


Cold Destiny

by FandomLifeTookMyHandAndSaidRUN, RickGrimesLover1010



Series: Cold Destiny [1]
Category: Rickyl - Fandom, The Walking Dead & Related Fandoms, The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Teenagers, Child Abuse, Daryl Dixon POV, Daryl Dixon/Rick Grimes Feels, Drug Abuse, Eventual Daryl Dixon/Rick Grimes, First Crush, First Love, First Meetings, I promise!, I'm Bad At Summaries, Love at First Sight, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Physical Abuse, Police Academy - Rick & Shane, Rick Grimes POV, Rickyl, Rickyl Writers' Group, Rickyl is endgame, Slow Burn Daryl Dixon/Rick Grimes, Tags May Change, Teenagers, This is a Rickyl story, Young Rickyl, it's very brief, out of character Top!Daryl in Chapter 11 with Jesus, out of character Top!Daryl in chapter 10, summaries are hard
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-16
Updated: 2017-01-04
Packaged: 2018-08-15 06:36:44
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 56,012
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8046022
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FandomLifeTookMyHandAndSaidRUN/pseuds/FandomLifeTookMyHandAndSaidRUN, https://archiveofourown.org/users/RickGrimesLover1010/pseuds/RickGrimesLover1010
Summary: A young Rick Grimes out for a fun night with friends, lays eyes on Daryl Dixon for the first time.  Irresistible, magnetic attraction is the driving force pushing Rick to meet the shaggy haired rugged young man. But is the feeling mutual?
 
"Maybe it's intuitionBut some things you just don't questionLike in your eyes, I see my future in an instantAnd there it goes,I think I found my best friendI know that it might soundMore than a little crazyBut I believeI knew I loved you before I met youI think I dreamed you into lifeI knew I loved you before I met youI have been waiting all my life"





	1. The First Obsession

**Author's Note:**

> -I wanna say a HUGE thanks for my amazing Beta (FandomLifeTookMyHandAndSaidRun) for helping me with this along with being an amazing Beta! We have been working on this for days now.
> 
> Definitely let me know what y'all think! This is my first attempt at an actual 'Series' !

Rick’s alarm rang out next to his ear and he jumped from the loudness of the damn thing. Reaching over, he turned it off and laid back against his pillow, groaning with tiredness. He jumped once again from the slamming of his door, watching Shane walk in. 

“Man, get up. We’re gon’ be late,” Shane hissed rubbing his head.

“I’m up.” He groaned again, swinging his legs off the bed and headed to the closet. 

“Hurry up, brother.” 

“I just got up! What’s the hurry Shane?” Rick growled pulling his black jeans and grabbed his black button up shirt.

“Got’a date, man,” Shane smirked, catching Rick’s full attention.

“Who is it today?” Rick chuckled softly, putting on his deodorant, and grabbing his book bag. 

Shane laughed quietly and followed Rick downstairs, then was stopped by Rick’s mother.

“Breakfast... You two, now.” 

“Oh, Mrs. Grimes, I already ate unfortunately.” 

“Mhm,” she smiled her motherly smile, like she knew better. 

Rick rolled his eyes looking at his best friend and took some of the bacon for himself, and then grabbed a couple waters for them both.

“Mom, we’re running late. Thank you though. Dad’ll appreciate this though.” He smiled lovingly then kissed his mom's cheek.

Shane did the same thing and headed out the door to his pickup truck. Rick threw his book bag in the back and climbed in the truck simultaneously to Shane.

“So, who is she?” He chuckled, putting his seatbelt on. 

“Been seeing this pretty lady for a minute now.” Shane smiled, backing out of the drive way.

“Who is she!?” 

“Women’s Athletic Director...” Shane mumbled, looking out of the corner of his eye. 

“Seriously?” 

“Ain’t messin’ with ya brother.”

“When has this been happening?”

“After school.”

“You’re with me after school.”

“Days I have football. I stay after... Girls on the track team think I’m watching them, but...”

“Wow. What’s your point score now?” Rick chuckled sticking his hand out of the window. 

“Ehh, more than you...” 

“I think it’s like 20 to 10...” 

“Can’t count yours... You ain’t even been passed 2nd base with most of them, brother.” 

“Not that you know of,” Rick countered, narrowing his eyes and smiled.

“Oh really? Who then?” 

“Ain’t telling.”

“Mhm. Sure. See...”

Rick scoffed into a laugh as Shane laughed as well. After they were parked they both got out, grabbed their bags and headed inside to meet up with a few other friends. 

“Mornin’ Shane!” Leon smiled.

“Yeah. I need your lunch money.” Shane growled, knowing that Rick was behind him shaking his head.

“How much?” 

“All of it?” Shane mocked. 

Rick curled his lip slightly and stopped Leon from giving Shane the money.

“He’s got money. Stand your ground, man. How you ever gon’ make it being a cop if you keep puttin’ your ass in the air for someone to take you?” 

“Been hopin’ I grow outta it.” Leon sighed then stuffed the money back in his pocket and stood there.

“Well, get goin’ if you ain’t givin’ me your money dude.” Shane scowled.

“Thank you, Grimes...” Leon whispered and walked away.

Rick grumpily rolled his eyes and shut his locker, hastily walked away. Knowing that Shane would follow.

“Rick...” Shane grunted, trying to catch up to him.

“Yeah?” Rick answered turning down a hallway.

“Just stop okay. Would ya’ just stop,” he pleaded.

Rick stopped in his tracks and looked at Shane with a blank expression. “What?”

“I’m sorry.” 

“Not me you need to be apologizing to.. And you know that.”

“Want me to go chase down that chode and apologize?”

“Chode, huh?”

“Didn’t stutter. Pretty sure that’s what I said,” Shane countered.

“Huh. If he is a chode... How would ya’ know, Shane? Have ya’ seen him naked?” 

“Shut up,” Shane gently smiled and started walking towards their homeroom.

“Have you?” Rick whispered as they sat down in their seats.

“No!” He lightly hollered in annoyance.

“Why’re you getting so defensive then?”

Shane squinted his eyes towards the older man and smiled. The one month older man, and smiled. “Have you seen him?” 

“Nope. Not sure I wanna...” Rick smiled but calmly spoke.

“Can anyone get a rise out’a you?” Shane laughed.

“Some can...” 

They both laughed and then the athletic director walked in.

“Quiet...” She sternly said looking at the two boys. 

As the morning announcements kept on going, they both kept eying one another making each other laugh silently. Of course the fact that Rick now knew who Shane was banging they couldn’t stop laughing. When the bell rang, they both stood up. 

“Mr. Walsh, I need to see you in my office...”

“Why? I ain’t no girl.. Got’a penis, m'am.” Shane countered, being his typical douchebag self.

“I’m fairly aware of what genitalia you have.” She narrowed her eyes towards him who was now swatting at Rick to shut him up. “And Mr. Grimes, your next class starts in 3 minutes. Best get a move on.”

“Uhh... What do I tell Mr. Ford?” Rick muttered, eyeing Shane with a smug smile. 

“Tell him that I needed Shane to help me with a few things down in the gym. Surely he won’t be missed from U.S History for one day..."

“Yes, M’am.” Rick smiled and nudged Shane. 

“See you after class. I’ll need the notes, man.”

“Mhm.” Rick hummed and walked out of the class, then tapped on the window making kissing faces against it. Then began to grope the window, making Shane bust out laughing and then he walked off.

~*~

As lunch time rolled around, Rick was out by the truck waiting for Shane so they could go get something to eat. 

“So...” Rick grinned.

“So...?” Shane rolled his eyes.

“How’d it... Go?”

“Went fine. Thanks for asking.”

“She want-”

“She wanted my... Johnson,“ he laughed.

“Dear god,” Rick groaned shaking his head, “Where we goin’ to eat?” 

“Thought ‘bout Taco Bell..” 

“Wouldn’t make it back in time...”

“Wan’ stop by that burger joint then?”

“Not really hungry. Maybe we could just get a slice of pizza from the gas station and a drink.”

“Alright. So, what’re you doing this weekend?”

“Uh... If dad’s not working... Then he’s probably going to want to keep on teaching me about guns and all that for the academy... You?” 

“Ehh, parents are outta town again. Meeting up with T-dog and his Asian friend tonight at the bowling alley.”

“Why do you call him T-dog? His name is Theodore..”

“And his last name is Douglas.. Hint the ‘T‘ and the ‘Dog‘ from his last name..” Shane laughed making fun of Rick.

“I’m not a idiot.” Rick sighed, as he pulled out his cell phone.

“You texting Chode?”

“No, Shane, I’m texting my mother. Telling her that I am going to the bowling alley tonight with a few friends...” 

“She’ll wan’ know with who... So tell her T-dog and the Asian kid.” He smirked, turning into the gas station.

“I know how to talk to my mother, Shane. And of course, I’ll tell her it’s Theo and Glenn.. The KOREAN kid...”

“I hate you sometimes,” Shane laughed.

“Whatever. Remember, one day the ass you hate will be the one having your back in the field...” Rick smiled.

“’bout that,” Shane muttered, getting out of the truck.

“You got your letter though, right?” 

“Yeah, yeah...”

“So, what’s the issue. Ya’ told me ya’ got in...”

“No, I did. I’m tryin’ to tell you ‘hat they gave me a call...”

“You too?” Rick cut him off as they walked in the gas station.

“About-”

“Starting-”

“Right after-”

“Graduation?” Rick finished, “Not leavin’ us much of a summer, huh.”

“Got’a admit. I’m kinda scared... Just cause we’re only 18...”

“We’ll be fine.” 

“Yeah.” 

~*~

That night, Rick and Shane pulled up joining Glenn and T-dog in the bowling alley. 

“Glenn...” Shane muttered as they were putting their bowling shoes on.

“Yeah?”

“Uhm, please tell me ‘hat you didn’t chose here tonight when the Greene’s are here...”

“I don’t... I... don’t know whatcha mean, Shane...” Rick slowly stepped up to monitor the conversation, already acting like a cop.

“You have a thing for the preacher’s daughter. That’s why we’re here.”

“She doesn’t even know who I am. So, we’re here to have fun, Shane. Let it go.” 

“Shane...” Rick muttered, as they went to get their bowling balls.

After a while all four guys were laughing and making fun of one another and Rick sat there watching their surroundings just because it was in his blood. After scanning the groups he noticed a relatively rugged kid. In that moment he was drawn to him like a magnet. The kid who sat there chewing on his thumb gazing off to the people around him. Long shaggy hair, muscular frame, biceps as big as a tree. The kid was gorgeous. 

And then, the rugged kid was now making eye contact with him. Rick gasped, not knowing what to do. He could divert his eyes to the game he was in. He could pretend to be watching another game. He could pretend to be looking for the bathroom. But he sat there, just staring right back at the other kid. He gulped as he watched intently as the kid got out of his seat and stalked over to him. 

“There a problem?” He growled low in his throat.

“Uhh, no. Not that I know of,” Rick stuttered, looking at him. “Name’s Rick... Grimes.”

“Rick... Grimes... Huh.” Daryl scowled, “If they ain’t a problem, stop staring at me. Got it?” He grumbled as he leaned down to Rick’s level, clearly threatening him.

“What’s your name?” Rick softly spoke.

“Make up one if ya’ wan’...” 

Rick sat there smiling gently and watched as the kid grew more uncomfortable, “Come on, just tell me... Ain’t gon’ kidnap ya’...”

“Dar... Daryl... Dixon...” 

“Dixon ya say? Brother of-”

“Merle. Yeah. The one and only. Now, can ya stop staring at me?”

“Are ya askin’ me or threatening me?” Rick countered, still smiling.

“Pick yer poison... Jus’ stop... Got it?”

“Why don’t ya’ join us. We’re about to start a new game.”

“Don’t bowl... Don’t wan’ intrude... And, I’s don’t want to be stared at...”

“If ya’ don’t want anything like that, they why’re you here?”

“Got dragged down here from that damn preacher and his family.”

“Oh, Hershel and Maggie.. And Beth... seems to be jealous.” 

“She’s a kid.”

“Aren’t we all?” 

“If I sit, will ya’ not bug the hell out’a me?”

“Can’t promise ya’ that.”

“And why not?”

“’Cause, I wan’ get to know you...” 

Daryl scoffed and looked towards the other kid then at the group of friends that were staring at them.

“Thought I wasn’t gon’ be stared at...” 

“Screw ‘hem. They’re not important,” Rick smiled gently and turned his attention back to Daryl, after narrowing his eyes to Shane, telling him to let them be.


	2. The Devoted Boy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The chase is on. Rick can’t let go, his pursuit of the young Dixon continues. Hidden truths are spilled, inciting an impassioned response and furthering Rick’s devotion to Daryl.

Daryl scoffed to himself, biting his thumb and looked back at Rick. “Would ya’ stop staring at me?” he growled.

“Would ya’ stop flatterin’ yourself? Who says I’m even lookin’ at you?”

“Stop ‘hat. I’s seen you outta’ the corner of my eye..”

“Ahh,” Rick smirked, finishing off his diet coke.

“What?”

“Do you always make it this hard for people to get to know you?”

Daryl scoffed, then looked back at Shane, T-Dog and Glenn bowling.

“I think...”

“Don’ really care whatcha’ think...”

“If ya’ didn’t, ya’ wouldn’t be arguing with me... Let alone, still sittin’ here.”

“Is you itchin’ to start’a fight?” Daryl hissed, turning his head to his smile.

“Hmm. Seems to me that your mouth is writin’ checks that your ass can’t cash,” Rick joked, setting the empty glass to the side and eyeing his friends.

“Oh? Seems ta me it’s the other way ‘roun,” Daryl joked back, then they both started laughing.

“I was serious ‘bout getting to know you, Daryl.”

“Why?” he asked, biting more on his thumb.

“Cause, you make me laugh and you’re interesting to me.”

“Ha! Ain’ nothing’ interesting ‘bout a _Dixon_.”

“I beg to differ...” Rick countered still smiling at the other kid.

“Why’re you’s always doin’ ‘hat..”

“Doin’ what?”

“’hat! Right there!”

Rick chuckled at the other kid who was clearly getting irritated.

“That’s called  _flirting_ , Daryl,” came a voice only familiar to him and Glenn.

“Didn’ ask fer yer opinion...” Daryl chided, rolling his eyes.

“No need to be an ass to the the girl.”

“No one asked ya’, Chinaman.”

“Dude, I’m Korean,” Glenn grunted in annoyance, “And for the record... He’s been flirting with you this whole time.”

Daryl sighed and looked towards the alleys so he could avoid Rick’s fiery eyes even though it was like Rick was burning them through the back of his head.

“Daddy’s takin’ Bethy home. Y’all wanna stay and bowl some more?” Maggie asked.

Rick looked at Shane as Shane looked to T-Dog, T-Dog looking at Glenn as Glenn looked at Daryl who looked at Maggie leaving the last for Rick to answer.

“Ain’ up to me! I’m just sitting here,” Rick spoke up smiling at their group.

“You’re driving...” T-dog said towards Shane.

“I don’t care. Parents’ are gone anyways.” Shane sighed pouring himself another drink and took a sip then spit it out, “What the fuck is that shit!”

They all started laughing at Shane, and looked at Rick.

“Shane, it’s diet coke. Ain’ gonna kill you.”

“You could’a warned me.”

As Rick and Shane began to bicker, Daryl leapt up out of his seat and started walking out front.

“Where-,” Rick asked then watched as Glenn pointed to the front door. Rick sighed, shaking his head at Shane who was showing his ass and walked out front.

As soon as he opened the door, he saw Daryl sitting there on the steps smoking a cigarette.

“Whyd’a leave?”

“Can’ stand ‘hat fightin’ shit,” Daryl said as nicotine filled his lungs.

“We wasn’ fightin’. And them things is gon’ kill you one day,” Rick smiled nudging Daryl’s arm.

Scoffing into a smile, Daryl eyed the good looking kid, “One day.. But not taday.”

“I don’t want there to be a one day...” rick mumbled and looked at the bright sky.

“Y’all may not have been fightin’ but y’all were bickering… ‘nd.. I don’ like ‘hat shit.”

“Wanna’ tell me why?”

“Not yer business.. Not important. And yer sure as hell ain’ important enough to me to try to know all m’ secrets.” daryl muttered and stood up as he walked down the steps towards the packed parking lot, not looking back, and even if he did he would have known that Rick was right on his tail.

After a while, Daryl turned around standing like he was about to be in a fight. “Why’re you following me!? Why’re you staring at me!?” he screamed at Rick while surrounded by nothing but parked cars and cars passing.

“Why does it matter so much to you? I’m not important enough, ‘member?” Rick countered, narrowing his eyes to Daryl.

“Whatever, man. I ain’ gotta stay ‘round fer ‘his,” he said, not moving his feet.

“Then go. No one’s stopping ya.”

“Fuck you!” Daryl spat as he bucked out his chest.

“Is that what you do? You let people close to you and when you start feeling vulnerable.. You close yourself up like’a spider being smushed.. Feel so scared that ya’ wanna crawl into a hole and die?” Rick calmly spoke, bucking up more.

“Go fuck yerself, Grimes. Ya don’ know one goddamn thing ‘bout me.”

“I’ve done it a few times by myself, don’ like it much. And I could if you’d let me!” he growled back low in his throat and pulled Daryl’s right arm so they could face one another again. But that was a mistake. Within seconds, Rick was on the ground holding his lip. As he opened his eyes, blood was filling his mouth and he looked at the kid who was towering over him, running his hands through his hair. “You fuckin’ punched me!”

“Don’ ever touch me ‘gain. Ya’ understand?” Daryl scowled and began to walk away, until he too found himself lying face down. “You bastard!” he yelled and felt Rick’s knee in his back and arms behind him.

“Are you done yet?” Rick asked, sort of amused.

“Wh-Where-What-Get off me!” Daryl screamed as he began to wiggle underneath Rick.

“Not til I know that you’re not gonna go all crazy and try to bash m’ head in...” Rick said as he held back his light laugh.

“Fine! I won’t. Let me go!” Daryl pleaded until he felt Rick raise up off him. As he stood they looked at one another.

“So...” Rick whispered, touching his busted lip.

“What...” Daryl growled into a soft laugh as he watched Rick wince at the lip.

“Ain’ funny.”

“It’s sort’a funny.”

Rick rolled his eyes and looked at Daryl whose eyes lingered longer than normal, “Yer daddy..”

“Yeah.”

“How long?”

He shrugged, “Don’ matter.”

“It does, actually,” Rick sighed leaning against a car.

“Since my Mama died and we lost the house,” Daryl coughed and pulled out another cigarette.

“You lost your house? Where are you staying now?”

“M’ daddy managed to get this house in the country. ‘ts a piece of shit, just like him, but what can ya do?”

“How did you-”

“Rick..” Daryl sighed, lighting his cigarette.

“My dad’s the Sheriff, Daryl. He can protect you and I-”

“All they’d do is call them people that come to people’s houses and he’ll pretend to be the father who is struggling and they’ll just leave and I’ll get it worse.. And not to mention, if I am taken away, he’d jus’ find me.”

“It’s not safe Daryl...” Rick whispered and watched Daryl more intently.

“Let ‘t go.”

“How do you expect me to let something like _this_ go?”

“’cause, there’s more than that if ya’ don’...” Daryl snarled, pointing to Rick’s lip that finally stopped bleeding.

“Daryl...” Rick sighed, “You could beat my ass all day if that means that you are safe…”

“Why’re you doin’ this?”

“Because, no one should have to be the punching bag of anyone. It’s not okay that your father is beating you! It’s not okay that one day... That one day.…”Rick scoffed, rubbing his head, “Would you just stop being a stubborn Dixon and realize that one day he’s goin’ to take it way too far and…”

“Already thought ‘bout ‘hat, Grimes. Wouldn’ be too bad if he did.. Least I’s see my mama again.”

“Oh my god! Do you hear yourself!?” Rick was now losing his cool, not even realizing that Shane had wandered outside, and come to stand behind him.

“Wanna dial it down there?” Shane muttered, looking at Rick and Daryl.

“Go inside, now!” Rick growled.

“No,” Shane pressed.

“He said go inside! Best be goin’ there, asshole.” Daryl lowly spoke, voice growling like a bear.

“Boy...” Shane warned.

“Ain’ no boy! Same age as you two fuckers! Now, go inside or do ya’ want a busted lip too.”

“Too?” Shane asked.

Rick turned around and faced Shane, “Go. Inside. _NOW_ !”

“Don’t even know why yer wasting yer time with-”

“Shut up!” Daryl tightened his fist, threatening to make a move toward Shane.

“Shane, please. Just.. go inside.” Rick was now pleading as he stood in-between the two guys.

“Fine. Let me know when you’re done saving your _girlfriend_ ,” he scoffed, turning on his heels and rubbing his head.

“Look, I’m gon’ go, Grimes.”

“No. Please. Just..”

“No, listen. I may be a Dixon and in these parts obviously ‘hat ain’t a good thing. But get one thing straight, I ain’ stupid. And I ain’ letting noone fight m’ battles or demons. Ya’ got ‘hat? If anything happens, or cops end up at m’ house, I will personally end up at yer front door and beat yer head in. I ain’t fuckin’ bout this shit! You think life’s so perfect. And if you wanted to get t’ know me ‘cause you were interested in me as more than a friend, ya’ shoulda’ started off with that. But now, there’s nothing more that will ever come from this!”

Standing there, Rick looked at Daryl who obviously was guarding himself, “Ya would’a talked to me if I would’a told ya’ from the start?”

“No.”

“Hmm. That’s what I thought.”

“Ugh! Has anyone ever told ya’ ‘hat yer annoying!” Daryl hollered.

“Sometimes,” Rick smiled and moved closer. “Please let me help you. I’m not going to be a cop for nothing Daryl. I can help you...”

“And when I need help, I’ll know who to call...” Daryl sighed and looked at Rick.

“Daryl...” Rick whispered as Daryl start walking away, “Please...”

“Let ‘t go, Grimes!” he hollered as he straddled his bike and pulled on his helmet.

Rick stalked to the bike and looked at Daryl who was beginning to start the bike.

“Here.”

“What’s this?” Daryl asked.

“My number, of course. Figured that you found out my intentions and so I couldn’t let ya go without it... And when you need me...”

“Hm.”

“Daryl, use it... Even if it’s not for the first option.”

“We’ll see. Got’a go,” he half smiled and let the bike roar to life underneath him.

“Be careful, please.” Rick yelled.

“Always,” he hollered back and sped off, leaving Rick in the parking lot.

Rick stood there watching the taillight of the motorcycle disappear in front of him and he shook his head and headed back inside to his friends.

 


	3. Ragged Healing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Daryl arrives home late, and finds himself on the receiving end of his father’s violent wrath. He manages to escape, and seeks out Rick for aid. But does he get to him in time?

Daryl pocketed Rick’s cell phone number in his front pocket as he sped down the lonely highway out of town. Chancing every light as it turned yellow, but he didn’t care because he  _ had _ to get home. He just knew deep down that Merle and his daddy were going to be up waiting for him. He wound the bike into every curve allowing it to flow all through his body and as he straightened up he glanced down at his watch that glowed in the dark.

_ Fuck! 10:55, _ he growled and sped the bike up even more until he almost missed the turn into the long road that lead to his house. 

He knew he was fucked. He had to be home by 10:30 at the latest, not even a second later. God, how much he hated living there. How much he hated his Mama for having to fall asleep while smoking and leaving him. He hated how Merle  _ never _ had his back. He hated that Merle and his daddy were always drunk and high as a fucking kite. He hated that he had to be the one that was always doing the illegal shit when they were too far gone from this world. 

He got off the bike in one smooth motion, taking his helmet off and shook his head to  _ fix _ his hair. He looked around and didn’t see any lights on. On the inside, he was screaming, thanking God that for once his douche bag brother and shitty father were asleep. As he walked up the front steps quietly, he jumped at the sight of the end of a lit cigarette.

“Yer late, boy,” Will hissed as he exhaled the nicotine, flicking the ashes. 

“I didn’t-”

“Did you get what I sent you for, boy?” 

“Dad, I... I scoped out all th’ places tha’ you sent me to, ‘nd there were peop’e there. Cops were out ‘cause it’s Friday and kids are stupid. I couldn’ get what you needed from the drug store or the liquor store...” Daryl sighed as he watched his father rise up off the rocking chair and approach him. 

“Did ya’ go to the scrap yard?” Will grumbled, tossing the butt into the yard as he stood in front of his terrified child. 

Daryl reluctant to answer, he just closed his eyes, casting off a silent prayer to God for him to just take him, while he smelled nothing but cigarettes and whiskey on his father’s breath. 

“God, boy! I send ya’ out fer one thing! One goddamn thing! ‘nd ya can’ even do ‘hat! I send ya’ to rob someone ‘nd ya’ tell me some bullshit lie! Ya’ tell me cops were around!? Well, sorry to break it to ya’ but yer a Dixon! Every Dixon has a goddamn record! So, you’s best start building ‘hat record!” Will hollered so loud that it shook Daryl from his spot and he raised his hand to Daryl’s face. He struck him hard, and Daryl flew over the wooden railing. 

Daryl knew better than to get up on his own, so he laid there. He laid there with blood pooling in his mouth, scared but pleading to God to just take him. Then the strong kick to his ribs came so fast that all he could do was cry out with each kick. 

“Get up!” Will yelled, and he spat at his son that lay there in the pile of leaves, “I fuckin’ said get up, you piece of shit!”

Daryl unwillingly raised himself slowly off the ground and as he was only getting to his knees, his father kicked him in the middle of his back right into the hardened dirt ground. 

_ God, if yer even there, please.. Please.. Just take m’ now… I cain’ do ‘his anymore… Why give m’a life to live like this! Why take my mama! Why let someone do this to their flesh ’nd blood! Please! Let m’ see the light! I said take m’! _ He screamed inside his head as tears fell down his face, and tried to crawl away from the scurrilous man that was his father.

“Where do ya’ think yer going!” Will screamed as he pulled Daryl to his knees right in front of him. 

Daryl shivered in fear with his eyes tightly closed as his father held his face up. 

“I raised ya’ better than ‘his!” his father shouted as his right fist connected to Daryl’s face. 

Daryl cried out in anger but hurt as well. He felt himself falling backwards from the blow but was then pulled back to the former position. Another blow, then another and another until he was damn near lifeless, choking on his own blood. As he cradled himself on the ground, his father gave him one more kick before heading inside.

 

~*~

 

Daryl raised himself on his left arm, spitting out as much blood as he could groaning in pain. Pain from breathing. Pain from the involuntary motions of his face to spit. Pain from his head. Pain. That’s all he felt, all he ever felt. He cursed to himself about his father, his brother, mother, and most of all, God. Years later, he still didn’t understand why the bastard never took him. Why he watched from above as he was beaten until he was lethargic. 

He shook his head realizing that he probably had a concussion due to his head feeling like a bowling ball. He grunted as he went to stand up, falling back on his face. He laid on his back staring at the now darkened sky and pulled his cellphone out, of course it was busted. So much for calling Rick. He took a couple deep breaths while holding on his side and pushed through the pain. As he stood up, he stumbled to the nearest tree to gain his balance. 

Staggering to his motorcycle he fished the keys out of his pocket not even caring that he didn’t have his helmet. He started the bike and it rumbled to life underneath his body as he felt pain soaring through his body. He growled and sped off hearing his father’s gun cocking and shooting. Crying out in pain as he leaned into the curves of the road towards King County, he sped up even more. Hoping to be pulled over, hoping that someone from King County would pull him over so they could take him to the Sheriff… Only because of the promise that Rick gave him and because he sure as hell didn’t know how long he could even drive for. But he kept pushing, not only himself but the bike as well. He knew where the Sheriff lived, didn’t need a GPS for that. Fuck, King County is as small as any backwoods hick town, no more than a gas station, post office, piggly wiggly, and mom and pop diner, could fit the whole of it inside Atlanta with room to spare. 

It was like a flash of light and he was now at  _ Sheriff Grimes _ ’ house. He knew something was wrong. He could barely see, his heart was racing and when he got off the bike he fell. The bike crumpled on top of him and he hollered out in pain. It wasn’t long until the front porch light was on, a older man with black hair, mustache and a gun was pointed towards him. 

“Dad!” is all he heard as his eyes closed involuntarily and the voices faded to indistinct echoes.

 

~*~

 

As he was coming to, he tried to sit up but laid back down rather quickly. He opened his eyes, realizing that only one was opened and the other was freezing cold.

“What-” he hoarsely spoke holding his head. 

“Don’t try to get up, sweetheart. You need to keep that frozen bag peas on that eye of yours,” Rick's’ mom spoke softly.

“Why do I have-”

“Your eye is black, Daryl. You can’t even open it.” Rick muttered as he moved around the couch so Daryl could see him.

“’m fine. I need t’ go.”

“We'll get you cleaned up, and make the couch up for you tonight. No arguing.  If you won't let me take you to the ER, then you're going to rest here. Where it's safe and quiet, and I can keep an eye on you. Busted ribs are serious business mister..." she spoke gently and dabbed the open cut above Daryl’s other eye. 

“I can’ stay here. I-”

“Look, son, as the Sheriff of King County, I need to make sure the townsfolk are safe. I don’t need something like this happening while I’m Sheriff,” Rick's dad sternly spoke.

“What about school? He can’t go looking like that,” Rick whispered to his mom, but loud enough for Daryl to grunt.

“He’s staying home from school...” She smiled sweetly at Daryl, who winced as she kept dabbing the blood off his face.

“Can I stay home?” Rick asked, as the opening was clear as day.

“No.”

“But, mom-”

“Richard... I said no arguing,” she said looking at her son who stood there next to Daryl.

“Thought you said that to him. Not me.”

“Why’re ya’ already throwin’ me under th’ bus?” Daryl grumbled out and took the bag of peas off his eye. 

“’Cause,” is all Rick said with a faint smile, focusing on Daryl's bloodshot and bruised eye.

“Stop starin’. I got ’his ’cause of ya...” he teased.

“Seriously?” Rick asked as his parents turned their attention from the boys.

“Well, no. But since ya’ can try ’nd use m’ as an excuse t’ get out’a school, then I get’a use ya’ too,” he smiled and they both chuckled a little bit.

“Rick, go get some sheets, a blanket and a couple of pillows for him. We need to make him somewhat comfortable,” Rick's mom said, eyeing them both with the exchange. 

“He can have my bed. I can sleep out here.”

“I’d rather have th’ couch, no offense. Pretty sure yer room probably smells like old fish sandwiches or something...” Daryl smirked, and Rick narrowed his eyes at him. 

“Go. You got school tomorrow and yer daddy’s gotta work in the morning.” 

“Fine.” Rick sighed, turning on his heels heading to the hallway closet to get what was requested.

“He’s not gon’a find me is he?” Daryl lowly spoke to Rick’s dad so Rick didn’t hear his panic.

“Son, even if he does... He’s going to have a helluva time getting passed them doors. I have guns up the wazoo in this house... Only to protect my family of course… And not to mention in the morning, I’m goin’ to have a couple deputies out there watching the house. Pretty sure everyone knows who  _ Will Dixon _ is and what he drives.” 

“Ya’ guys really don’ have t’ do ‘his, Mr. and Mrs. Grimes.”

“Evelyn. My name is Evelyn. And  _ Mr. Grimes _ is Samuel. Just Samuel...” 

“Or Sam... Or... Sheriff,” he spoke out as Rick walked back in.

“How do you guys know one another? Been meaning to ask that, just ‘cause of all the places you could have gone, you came here,” Evelyn smiled, as she began to make the couch up. 

“School, mom.”

“Oh, don’ go lying t’ yer mama, Rick...” Daryl smiled,  wincing from standing.

“I like him. He isn’t anything like Shane. Good influence there,” Samuel sternly said.

“Dad, Shane’s not that bad.”

“So, how do you two know one another?” she asked yet again, putting the pillows down, assisting Daryl to the couch.

“We just met actually.” Rick sighed, he now knew that they were interested in him as well. 

“Oh really?” she smiled and looked at the two kids again.

“At the bowling alley, mom.” 

“Is that why this happened, Daryl?” Samuel asked as he rested his very large hands on the back of the couch.

“Not exactly jus’ ‘hat, sir,” Daryl whispered, eyeing Rick to try to get him out of the awkward situation. 

“Mom, Dad, we should just let him rest,” Rick piped up eyeing Daryl back. 

“Alright, that’s fine. But we’re gonna have to talk about it tomorrow, son.”

“Yes, sir,” Daryl sighed. 

_ That was so odd that Rick knew exactly what I was saying. How did he know what I was saying? Of course I am not going to admit it, but damn! He is pretty hot standing there in his plaid pajama bottoms and tight grey t-shirt... Not to mention, they like me a helluva lot better than Shane already. Unless it’s just sympathy for me...  _

“Get some rest, sweetheart,” Evelyn smiled and leaned down kissing Daryl's forehead. 

“Yes, M’am,” is all Dary could mumble, feeling tears forming in the back of his eyes.

“10 minutes, Richard. Then bed,” she added as she and Samuel went to their room.

“Yes, mom.” He sighed waiting for the door to close, “Are you alright?”

“No. No, I am not alright. But thanks fer askin’,” Daryl muttered with his eyes closed, “Thank ya’ for everything.”

“Didn’t do anything, Daryl.” 

“Ya saved me.” 

“Be that as it may, Daryl... You saved yourself.”

“Don’ start ‘hat shit, Grimes,” Daryl grumbled, with his right eye peeking at him. 

“I ain’t doin’ nothing!” Rick smiled, sitting on his knees next to the couch. “Thank you.”

“Fer what?” Daryl asked furrowing his eyebrows. 

“Fer not continuing to beat my ass... Plus, how did ya even know where I live?”

“How’re ya’ ever gon’ make it bein’ a cop if ya’ are askin’ me ‘hat question, Grimes.”

“It’s a simple question with a relatively simple answer.” Rick countered, pulling the bag of thawing peas off of Daryl's face.

“’hat’s fine. Ya’ can take a picture of my new shiner,” Daryl laughed lightly, grimacing from the sharp pain of his ribs.

“5 minutes, Rick!” Evelyn hollered through her door. 

Both teenagers looked at one another, and Rick gently smiled at Daryl who kept moving his head on the couch.

“Gotta admit, this ain’t the comfiest couch, but it sure is a hell of a lot comfier than the ground I would’a been sleepin’ on..” 

“You can stay here as long as you want,” rick smiled as he placed the cold bag of vegetables back on Daryl's face again.

“Mmm. ‘hanks. You’s best be getting to bed,  _ Richard _ ‘fore yer momma comes on out here ‘gain.” 

“Yeah...” Rick sighed looking forward, rolling his eyes before standing up, “Good night, Daryl.”

“You too.”

“Ya know, ya can tell me good night. It ain’t gon’ hurt nothing.” 

“Bed, Richard!” Evelyn hollered even louder.

“Damn woman. Shut it! I was sleeping and instead of sleepin’ yourself you’re more interested in them boys’ talking!” Samuel growled out, and both Rick and Daryl looked at one another with a smirk.

“Do you want the lights on?” Rick asked quietly.

“No. If my daddy comes here.. I don’ wan’ him peeking through ‘nd seein’ me.” 

“Are you warm enough?” Rick asked trying to stop himself from smiling.

“’m fine, Rick. Stop stalling ‘nd go t’ bed,” Daryl chuckled as he gingerly pulled the blanket up over his arms more.

“Fine. Good night.” 

“Mhm,” Daryl whispered, nodding off to sleep before Rick could even get out of the living room.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 4 has been submitted to be beta'd. You're in for a treat, folks, because it's much much longer than these first three chapters. Let us know what you think, comments are what motivate writers!


	4. Voyage of Truth

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Daryl continues to rest and allow his wounds to heal while in the care of the Grimes family. He and Rick share about their pasts, further solidifying their growing connection.

The following morning, Rick kept hitting the snooze button on his alarm. By the fifth time it went off he turned it off completely. He swung his legs to the side of the bed and staggered over to his closet. He grabbed his blue jeans that hugged his hips just the right way and grabbed a black t-shirt from his dresser. As he stripped down, he quickly got re-dressed and smoothed his hair the best he could. He then put on his deodorant and body spray then grabbed his backpack.     
  
When he got downstairs he saw that Daryl wasn’t on the couch so he followed the smell of food to the kitchen. Walking in he smiled right at Daryl who sat in the corner seat next to the wall, smiling towards Rick's mom's back as she was still talking.    
  
“The weather is looking dreary today. I think it might rain,” she softly spoke as she put bread into the toaster and worked on Rick's lunch.   
  
Rick emerged quietly into the kitchen so he didn’t interrupt their conversation, or his mother's’ conversation.    
  
“Yeah, looks like it,” Daryl responded quietly,  watching her intently on making a turkey and cheese sandwich then grabbing a diet coke and water, putting it all in the lunchbox.  _  His parents never made his lunch _ , he thought to himself.   
  
“Sleep good?” Rick asked quietly as he sat next to Daryl, eyes meeting one another.   
  
“Mhm,” Daryl hummed directing his  _ one _ good eye back towards Mrs. Grimes.   
  
“And, since all the kids are going to be in school.. That’s a good thing, do you know why?” she smiled turning back towards the toaster to grab the finished toast.   
  
“No, ‘m sorry m’am. I don’ know why,” Daryl sighed, wincing in every word and breath as he talked.    
  
“Mom? Can we get Daryl something to eat. I don’t think he’s eaten since last night.” Rick asked eyeing the other kid who apologetically smiled.   
  
“Richard, you know that it’s rude to interrupt like that,” she huffed, shaking her head.   
  
“I have asked to be called Rick, mom. And no one really cares about the weather or the neighborhood.”   
  
“Rick!” his father warned, tucking his shirt in his pants as he walked into the kitchen.   
  
“Well, sorry, but it’s true, Dad. You know it’s true. You always read your paper when she talks about the same crap every day... And you pretend to listen but you actually nod and hum just to show that you are  _ listening _ to her,” Rick scoffed and used quotation marks in the air for ‘listening’, and looked at Daryl who leaned his head against the wall.    
  
Seeing the other kid like he was, he got up grabbing a cup of orange juice, toast and bacon. He brought everything back to the table for Daryl and sat down to eat his breakfast as well.    
  


“ _ Thank you, _ ” Daryl’s eyes said.   
  


Rick smiled back and nodded to Daryl, saying _‘You’re welcome_.’ Rick’s mother brought his father his cup of coffee as she sat down to eat with the family. His parents made small talk to one another ignoring the fact that Rick and Daryl could barely keep their eyes and eye off one another. They ate in silence glancing at one another often.   
  
After they finished breakfast, Rick took his and Daryl’s plates to the sink, rinsing them off and grabbed his lunch.   
  
“Shane here already?” Evelyn asked sweetly.   
  
“Catching a ride with someone else today, Mom,” Rick simply answered, nodding to Daryl who still sat in the corner.   
  
“Who? And why don’t you drive? Wouldn’t that be easier?” she asked, putting the dishes in the dishwasher.  
  
“T-dog, Mom. Shane isn’t coming to school today. And I don’t drive because they’re ain’t a point to drive a few miles to the school when my friends are already driving,” he sighed, and kissed his mother’s cheek and headed out the door.   
  
~*~  
  
As Rick went off to school and Mr. Grimes left shortly thereafter, Daryl made his way slowly into the living room to rest a bit more.  Mrs.Grimes came in right after him.   
  
“Sweetheart, I have some errands to run today. I want you to stay in Rick’s room so you can have some more privacy, and I had him lay some towels and some of his old clothes out for you. You can sleep in there and just rest that pretty little head of yours. I should be back rather soon. I have to pick something up for you.”  
  
“Thank you, m’am. And can I ask what it is exactly you’re getting me?” he smiled faintly at her as she grabbed her purse.  
  
“You’ll find out when I get back. Now go...” she smiled through her stern words, but before exiting the house she turned around, “Anything you want you can have. There’s water, sweet tea and diet coke in the fridge. Food is all over in the cabinets as well. Make yourself at home, Daryl.” And before he could contest it, she was already out of the house locking the front door.  
  
He sat there rather quietly just listening to the clock ticking. _Tick, tock, tick, tock, tick, tock_. After struggling to get off the couch, he groaned once he was on his feet. He still couldn’t believe that he was being left to roam through _Sheriff Grime’s house_ , especially with him being a Dixon. But even he knew that he was a lot different than Will or Merle Dixon. Maybe if he knew that then everyone else knew that too.   
  
He rolled his eyes and made it to the bathroom that was next to Rick’s room and saw the clothes, towel and washcloth sitting on the counter. He locked the door, turning the light and fan on, then turned the water on. Damn bathroom had cowboys on the wall like for a little kid. He chuckled to himself ‘cause this was obviously something he’d use to make fun of Rick... To his face...   
  
As he went to take his shirt off, he gasped in pain. The stabbing pain in his chest hurt the most for him. Not the black eye. Not the headache, but that he could barely move without wanting to bust out crying from the agonizing pain. When he managed to get the shirt off, he then undid his jeans letting them fall to his ankles before stepping out of them. Once he put all of his dirty clothes in a pile he got in the shower and just stood there allowing the hot water to wash over his abused body.   
  
~*~  
  
After his shower he got dressed and put his clothes in a bag taking them into Rick’s room and collapsed so hard on the bed that he didn’t even remember having a single thought before he was taken to _dreamland_. He was jolted half awake when he heard Mrs. Grime’s voice and something set down on the bedside table before leaving. He couldn’t make out exactly what she had said but managed to go back to sleep, peacefully… until the damn thing kept vibrating insistently.   
  
He rolled over forgetting about his broken ribs grabbing the phone that was still going off.   
  
_[774-202-1978]_ _  
_ _  
_ _‘It’s Rick. Mom got you a phone for emergencies then texted me your number. Thought I’d check in on you.’_ _  
_ _  
_ _‘Please tell me you’re still home. I don’t want to come home and hear that you went back to your dads.’_ _  
_ _  
_ _‘Daryl, please. This is important.. I need to know that you’re okay’_ _  
_ _  
_ _‘That’s it, I’m coming home. Fuck school!’_   
  
Daryl chuckled softly at the texts re-reading them over and over again until he was in a coughing mess. He rolled his eyes and texted back to Rick.  
  
 _[668-285-7712]_ _  
_ _  
_ _‘Hello, Richard. I’s fine. Took a shower. Layin’ in yer bed now. Was asleep actually. And this damn thing just kept going off. No need to come back home. And I went ahead and programmed your name in here’_ _  
_ _  
_ _[Rick:] Name’s Rick.. You know that. And woulda’ been nice to know. I thought somethang bad happened. I get out early today anyways. Programmed you too, by the way._ _  
_ _  
_ _[Daryl:] Ain’ that sweet you worrying ‘bouts me. No need. Go see Shane, see if he’s okay. I’s fine. Was about to roll back over and go back to sleep._ _  
_ _  
_ _[Rick:] Shane ain’t sick. He’s screwing the Athletic director. Needed ‘hat fix in I guess. Well, my beds’ comfier than that couch, right?_ _  
_ _  
_ _[Daryl:] It is. Focus on your work. I’s goin’ back to sleep, Richard._ _  
_ _  
_ _[Rick:]_ ** _Rick_** _. That’s my name._ _  
_ _  
_ _[Daryl:]  ZzZzZzZz_ _  
__  
__[Rick:] I’ll be home in a few hours._ _  
_ _  
_ _[Daryl:] Okay._  
  
  
Daryl put the phone back on the table and pulled the comforter more on him, nuzzling his head more into the pillow. He began to slip more into a deep slumber.   
  


  
~*~  
  
Rick arrived home, putting his lunchbox in the kitchen and ran up the stairs.  The door to his room is was shut, which meant that obviously Daryl was still asleep. He quietly opened the door, creeping inside then shutting it as softly as he could. He walked to his desk and put the backpack on the floor and looked at Daryl who was sleeping so peacefully. He sat at his desk and watched him sleep for a few minutes until he began to stir in the bed. As Daryl tossed and whimpered in pain, Rick had grabbed his homework and began to start on it quietly.   
  
“Hey,” Daryl rasped out.  
  
“Didn’t mean to wake you. I’m sorry.”  
  
“Ya’ didn’ wake me, _Richard_. I woke myself up.”  
  
“Rick,” he said and glanced over his shoulder at the other kid still lying in the bed.  
  
“Right. Rick.” Daryl smirked and pulled another pillow under his head, “How was school today?”  
  
“Same shit, different day. Whoever said Senior year was the greatest was a damn liar. I have more homework this year than I have had my entire life.”  
  
“Ahh. Whatcha working on?” Daryl sighed and watched as Rick turned in his chair handing him the math book, and piece of paper before sitting on the bed with him.   
  
“Calculus?” Daryl smiled shaking his head, “who’s yer teacher?”  
  
“Ms. Espinosa,” Rick answered, rolling his eyes.   
  
“Hm. I can help if ya’ wan’ me to...” Daryl sighed then looked up at Rick.  
  
“You know how to do all this?” Rick charmingly smiled from ear to ear.   
  
“Yep,” Daryl mockingly smirked.  
  
“Show me then,” he softly laughed.  
  
Daryl rolled his eyes and flipped the book to the back and found the page number and began to laugh uncontrollably at Rick’s reaction.   
  
“Here. You needed help on answer 57a? Answer is _it will take 11.3 years_.”  
  
“How’d you know that?!” Rick sarcastically inhaled into a laugh.  
  
“Magic,” Daryl laughed and held his side, “No seriously though. I ain’ got the slightest clue on how to do ‘his shit.”  
  
“Then how do you pass it?” Rick asked writing the answer down still laughing.   
  
“Maggie does my homework and texts me the answers to the tests.”  
  
“And why would such a _goody-two-shoes_ do something like that?” Rick asked as he began to work the problem out.  
  
“’Cause her little sister has a crush on me, or something like that. Told me to take her on a date.. And I did...”   
  
“How’d that go?” Rick smiled and moved on to the next problem.  
  
“Didn’.”  
  
“Then, how-”  
  
“’hat’s all she asked of me, ‘nd I did it. I’s a man of my word, Rick.” Daryl smiled while resituating himself to a more comfortable position on the bed.   
  
“Oh.” Rick smiled affectionately, “You like Beth?”  
  
“Nope,” he answered, looking the next odd answer up for Rick.  
  
“You like whatser’ face? Andrea?”  
  
“Nope. Not my type.”  
  
“Me neither.” Daryl laughed, “’nd the answer for Ch. 7; question 21 is that _x equals 2.5_.”  
  
“I need to show the work, Daryl.”  
  
“Says who?”  
  
“Ms. Espinosa?” Rick answered.   
  
“Doesn’t say on the paper, and you know that I am gay which is why I am not interested in Beth or any other pair of boobs in this town, right?”  
  
“I was waiting for you to tell me that because... Well, not many people know ‘bout me,” Rick whispered, almost as if he felt someone was listening through his door.  
  
“’nd what’s that?” Daryl asked.   
  
“I’m not completely... Ehh...”  
  
“What?” he asked, leaning his head back againt the pillows.   
  
“I’m bi-sexual,” Rick whispered.   
  
“Never coulda’ guessed,” Daryl joked and stretched out, “What time is it?”  
  
“Uhh, bout 5 I think. Why?”  
  
“No reason,” Daryl sighed and closed his eyes, until he felt his stomach growl and he peeked his eye to Rick who was laughing.  
  
“You could have just said that you were hungry.”   
  
“Yer mama didn’t tell you it was time fer dinner.”  
  
“Touche,” Rick smirked and put his book on the desk chair, “So, I think now is as good time as any since you’re in my clothes and bed to get to know one another, huh?”  
  
“You first,” Daryl pressed as he closed his eyes once again, trying not to focus on his stomach growling.  
  
“Whatcha want to know?”   
  
“Anything, I guess?” Daryl scoffed and nuzzled into both pillows.  
  
“I actually am graduating a year earlier. Turn 18 in the fall. You already know my lifestyle. Dad’s the Sheriff, Mom’s a stay at home mom. No siblings, well, Mom lost my brother when he was about 4, so I think I was like, 8 or so. His name was Jeffrey. They don’t really talk about it. Shane and I, we’ve been friends since we were in diapers. He’s my best friend.” Rick sighed as he leaned his back against the bed frame.   
  
“What happened to yer brother?” Daryl whispered as he peeked to Rick who was staring straight off.   
  
Rick sighed heavily as he closed his eyes.   
  
“Mom took me and Jeff to the store to get groceries like we did every week or so. Jeff wanted to stop and get something for Halloween or get a costume or something and we were heading out of King County to go the next town over... He undid his seatbelt in the carseat and I was playing with my army guys and wasn’t paying attention… It was raining, hard. Mom was a nervous reck. Yelling at us, telling us to be quiet because she couldn’t see or something... So anyways, he took it off to get his toy and all I remember was that Mom was screaming and we were rolling.. The car was just rolling and when we stopped...” Rick sighed, pressing the bridge of his nose trying not to cry, “when we stopped, Mom had been able to crawl out and there were so many people who were behind us because the traffic was crazy and they pulled me out... I had his hand... And… And when they got him out, he wasn’t responding to anything... Later on, I remember hearing the doctor telling my mom and dad that Jeff’s neck was broke from the impact... And he died instantly... And the cause was because his seatbelt... And if I would have been paying attention, he’d still be here.” He sighed and ran his hand through his hair shaking his head and looked at Daryl who had a tear falling down his cheek.   
  
“Rick, I am so sorry. I didn’ mean to bring that up.”  
  
As Rick went to answer he heard his mother yelling.  
  
“Dinner’s ready!”  
  
“Be right back,” Rick whispered, sniffling and went down stairs.  
  
~*~  
  
Rick reached the kitchen and saw two plates plus his parents at the table, they were already eating. He looked at them and stayed quiet. He was afraid of what the answer was going to be.  
  
“Rick, it’s time for dinner. Where’s Daryl?” she asked.  
  
“He’s upstairs.”  
  
“Well, did you tell him it was time to eat?”  
  
Rick stood there and sighed as he worked the words through his head.   
  
“Mom? Can we eat in my room? He’s having a hard time moving. I’ll bring the dishes down when we’re done,” he asked with pleading eyes.  
  
“Sure, but dishes need to be down here tonight and in the dishwasher.”  
  
“Of course. Thank you,” he smiled and kissed her head.   
  
He grabbed the plates of food and a couple of drinks with their silverware and took them upstairs. Walking in he placed the plates on his desk then closed his door. He gave one plate, drink and silverware to Daryl, and sat next to him in the bed. Together they ate in peace and kept glancing at one another. Rick had blatantly stared towards the end while watching Daryl suck his fingers that he used to help put food on the silverware.  
  
“What?” he asked, sucking his last finger.  
  
“Nothin’,” Rick answered and finished off his diet coke.  
  
“Yer starin’ again,” Daryl scoffed and handed Rick his plate.   
  
“Do you eat?” Rick asked, mentally kicking himself in his head.  
  
“Well, yeah?” he asked back confused at the question.  
  
“I meant, does your Daddy feed you?” Rick quietly asked.  
  
“I feed myself.”  
  
“What’s that mean?” Rick asked as he gathered their plates and silverware, stacking it all.   
  
“Take that downstairs before we get yelled at and I’ll answer every question that you get right on your math homework.” Daryl smirked playfully and pulled the cover back over himself, “By the way, thanks.”  
  
“Homeworks done. So you still gotta answer my questions. And for what?” he asked as he slowly got off the bed.  
  
“Helpin’ me and giving me these clothes to wear. Used yer soap by the way,” he gently laughed as he tried to get comfortable.  
  
“My pleasure,” Rick smiled and took their plates downstairs.  
  
After a few minutes, Rick had arrived back in his room, he saw Daryl lying there with his arms over his chest, peacefully breathing and eyes closed.  
  
“Ya fall asleep on me?”  
  
“Nah. Just enjoying this.”  
  
“Enjoying what?”  
  
“The peace and quiet. Wouldn’ be so bad where I live ‘cause we live in the middle of nowhere, but like... With Daddy and Merle, I can’t hear and or enjoy the bugs or nothing...”   
  
Rick frowned at the kid whose eyes were still gently closed. He walked to his closet cracking it open and changed into his pajama pants then walked to the bed, gently joining the other kid who peeked his eye open.   
  
“Time for bed?” Daryl asked, his voice heavy with need to sleep.  
  
“Nope. Not yet.”  
  
“Oh, yeah. Gotta help you with yer math... And I gotta answer questions,” Daryl sighed as he tried sitting up, but Rick stopped him.   
  
“Homework is done. Just lay there. No need for you to be puttin’ yerself in _more_ pain than what you already are.” Rick mumbled low as he pulled the blanket over them both and laid on his side, facing the beaten kid.   
  
“Hope you ain’t getting no ideas, Grimes.”  
  
“How many nicknames do you actually have for me?” he asked as he lightly snorted, “And nobody is getting no ideas from nowhere.”  
  
“20 questions. ‘hat’s it. ‘hat’s all you get, _Richard_ , got it?” Daryl grunted as he maneuvered back and forth until he finally managed to get into a position to look back at Rick.  
  
“20 questions. Got it.” he instantly said.  
  
“Whenever yer ready.”   
  
“How did you lose your mother?”  He regretted asking it as soon as Daryl’s eyes met his. All he could see was sadness, darkness and depression.   
  
“Wow. Ya don’ start off easy do you?” Daryl sighed before searching for the words, “By the time I was old enough to learn to ride a bike... I had some friends. Or thought they was friends... I’s had went to play with ‘hem and when I was on my way back there was smoke coming from m’ house...”  
  
“Oh god..” Rick sighed as he looked apologetic to the other kid.  
  
“Ya’ wan’ know or are ya’ gon’-”  
  
“Right, go ahead.” Rick frowned and allowed Daryl to continue to talk about it.  
  
“When I’s got to m’ house.. The cops, firemen, paramedics.. Merle and m’ daddy were standing ‘here. When I got ‘here, the house was engulfed in flames.. My mom wasn’ there. Later on, it was revealed that she was most likely drunk ‘nd passed out with a lit cigarette and ‘hats how she died.”  
  
Rick remained quiet and looked at Daryl with sorrow in his eyes, already feeling the tears forming, “I am so sorry.”  
  
“’ts alright. 19 more.”   
  
“When did your daddy start beating you?”  
  
“Shortly after. Tolds’ you we lost th’ house and he had managed to get this shitty house. Merle ‘nd him were scaveging fer drugs, money ‘nd shit to steal to get money fer drugs.”  
  
“How long?” Rick asked while repositioning himself.  
  
“Is that another question?”  
  
“Think of it as the same category..”   
  
“Lost mom at 9 years old... I’m 18 now...”   
  
“Oh my god...” Rick huffed, clearly showing his anger at how Daryl’s father could hurt him the way he has.  
  
“18 left.”  
  
“Why do you stay?”  
  
“Ain’t got nowhere left to go.. 17 left.”  
  
“’s he the reason why you miss so much school?”  
  
“How’d you know ‘bout ‘hat?”  
  
“Heard mom and pop talking downstairs when I went to take our plates-”  
  
“Fuck.”  
  
“Hey now, I still got 16 questions left and you still have to answer the one I just asked.”  
  
“Yes.”  
  
“Why does he beat you?”  
  
“He’s a drug addict and a alcoholic..”  
  
“Sounds like a excuse to me.”  
  
“Probably is... You got 15 left.”  
  
“What does he beat you with?” Rick asked.  
  
“His fists, belt, feet, head butts me. Sometimes, it’s a 2 by four. He’s thrown my bike on me. He’s hit me with his truck.. He’s taken twigs and the metal part of the belt to my back..”   
  
“Have you tried to stand up to him?”  
  
Daryl groaned audibly, dragging his hands through his hair and grunting in pain, “Of course I have. So did Merle. Merle tried to stop him from beating me to beat him ‘nd my Daddy just gets us both.”   
  
“Why haven’t you said anything to anyone?”  
  
“Richard, you’re beginning to piss me off.”   
  
“Answer that one and I’ll switch to totally different ones.”   
  
“I was in elementary school ‘nd got into a fight with a stupid punk ass bitch, ‘nd he tugged too hard on m’ shirt ‘nd it ripped. Everyone saw my scars on m’ back ‘nd I was instantly taken to the nurses office. She asked, I told her everything I’s told you... ‘nd let’s just say ‘hat I got it 1000 times worse when I got home.”  
  
“People that’re supposed to take care of you... Failed you... I am so sorry.”  
  
“Well, I’m safe right now.” Daryl smiled and rolled on his back looking at the ceiling.   
  
“Why do you smoke?” Rick softly asked as he looked at the other kid still.  
  
“Wanted a reason to be close to my mom again. Sounds stupid, I know.”   
  
“No, it sounds perfectly sane. I want to be a cop ‘cause I lost my grandfather. He was a cop. I want my father to be proud of myself. So, no, it sounds sane.”  
  
“14 left,” Daryl yawned heavily and cussed to himself.   
  
“What’s your middle name?”   
  
“Ain’ got one.”  
  
“Why not?” Rick asked.   
  
“13 left. And cause my Daddy ain’t see no point in naming trash. Momma’ gave me the name Daryl after her uncle.”  
  
“Maybe I should give you one?” he softly laughed as the moon shined through the window.  
  
“What would that be?” Daryl laughed through another yawn.   
  
“Hmm. Daryl-”  
  
“Already named ‘hat.”  
  
“Shut up, I know that. I’m thinking..”  
  
“What’s your middle name?”   
  
“Sawyer… Got it! Frederick. Daryl Frederick Dixon!” Rick smirked from ear to ear in the shadows of the moon.   
  
“Daryl Fredrick Dixon...” Daryl sighed testing it as it came out of his mouth.  
  
“Whatcha think?”   
  
“Sounds gay,” he laughed and they looked at one another, “Well, I guess it fits me… since I’m gay or whatever..”   
  
Rick smiled shaking his head and they laid there not talking for a while until Daryl began to mumble.   
  
“You still have like 10 questions..”   
  
“Try like 12”   
  
“Nah, 10. I used two of them.”   
  
“Oh? Okay. Well, How did you break it to your dad that you are gay?”  
  
Sleepily, Daryl laughed, “Got the shit beat out of me.”   
  
“I don’t think it’s that funny, to be honest, Daryl.”  
  
“Oh come on. I’m still here. I’m still alive.”  
  
“Yeah, what happens when it happens again?”  
  
Daryl sighed then rolled towards the wall, “Then I guess I’d be happy knowing that I got to share a warm bed with someone that is more interested in me than my past..”   
  
Rick laid facing Daryl’s back not saying anything and acted as if he was asleep. What the hell was he supposed to say to that? Of course while thinking for the words, he then realized that Daryl was sound asleep. Dead to the world. He smiled to himself, closing his eyes, slipping off to paradise himself.   
  
_As they both lay there sound asleep, neither of them realized that Rick was pressed behind the heated body that lay before him. His arms wrapped tightly around Daryl, making sure he couldn’t go anywhere. Neither noticed the hands intertwining one another. Neither stirred at the alluring touch of the other man. They laid there, content and sound asleep, not moving an inch unless it was to get closer to one another..._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, it can't be all sunshine and daisies all the time, can it? Chapters 5 and 6 are in the hands of FandomLifeTookMyHandAndSaidRUN. 
> 
> With graduation looming, and many changes upon the horizon, the turmoil will undoubtedly continue. What's going to happen with Will Dixon? Are Rick and Daryl going to continue to grow closer? Will Shane be the supportive friend, or will jealousy rage? Hm... Good questions. Let's see how it all pans out. Chapter 5 coming soon!


	5. The Broken Ice

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Daryl comes to a realization that his time with Rick is not quite what he expected it to be, and he has trouble adjusting to what the future has in store. But hope is not lost for our darling duo!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hellooooo! FandomLifeTookMyHandAndSaidRUN here, wow isn't that a mouthful... Eleni has handed the reins over to me for this chapter. It was a bit of a switch, me writing it up, and then I sent it off to her to "countrify" Daryl's dialog for me. Continuity is important, yes?
> 
> I do hope that you all have as much fun reading it, as I did writing it. Enjoy!

“Richard, honey?  I didn’t hear your alarm go off?  Did you boys forget to wake up?,” Mrs. Grimes called through the door, rapping her knuckle against it.  “It’s a school day, honey!  Time to rise and shine!  And tell Daryl I’ll make him up a lunch too, in case he’s feeling up to going.”

 

“He can hear you, Mom.  He’s in here too ya know,” Rick grumbled, and flopped to his back stretching his arms over his head.  He rolled back over onto his side and was met with the sandy blonde mop of Daryl’s messy bed head.  He sat up quickly, rubbing his eyes and looking around.  His book bag and homework lay out on his desk where he left it.  He looked back at the body shaped lump on the bed, and came to the realization that he and Daryl had shared the bed for the night.  And he was strangely okay with that.  He felt well rested, and it was nice sharing space with someone who seemed to enjoy his company.  He only hoped that Daryl felt the same way.

 

A moment later, Daryl rolled onto his back blinking blearily at Rick.  “I’m up, I swear.  I jus' need'a minute…”  Having spent the majority of the night in one position, his healing body was particularly sore and ached with every move.  

 

“Take your time,” he moved to the closet getting himself dressed for the day, and pulling out an outfit for Daryl.  “Here, get changed.  You feeling up to coming downstairs for breakfast?”

 

Daryl nodded as he rubbed his hands over his face and through his hair, combing it haphazardly with his fingers.  “Yeah, see if yer mom has any ibu… ibupro-, fuck… Whatever 'hat over the counter pain meds are.  If ’m going to school I need something to take the edge off…”

 

“I don’t know, can you even see out of your other eye yet?”

 

“I can’ stand being cooped up all day.  'nd ain’t safe for m' to be out.  If Merle or m' Dad saw me-”

 

“I’ll mention it to Dad, I didn’t get the chance to talk to him when he got in last so I don’t know where the case stands.”

 

“The case?  What case?  I didn’ press no charges!  Fuck!”

 

“Daryl, he beat you.  We witnessed the aftermath, and carried your unconscious body into the house. I don’t think you pressing charges was a requirement for him to be arrested.  My Dad wants him off the streets-”

 

“If he thinks I pressed charges, I can’ never go home.  He’ll kill me!”

 

Rick leaned back against his desk, crossing his arms over his chest, “Why would you go back home?  After what he did to you?”

 

“Told ya before, ain’t got no place else to go.”

 

“Daryl, there are government programs that can help victims of violence and abuse to get escape their aggressors and find new homes.”

 

“Ain’t interested in being a part of ‘the system,’ and I sure as hell ain’t looking fer no goddamned handout.” His eyes, well the one good eye Rick could see, blazed with a fury Rick had yet to witness. Sure, he had seen Daryl angry before, and the swollen split lip was proof of what he was capable of, but there was an edge to this sudden emotion that he couldn't quite figure out.

 

So Rick chose to not press the issue further until they knew more. “I'll get an update from Dad, and then we can explore your options.”

 

Daryl was breathing heavily and agitated, Rick didn't want him meeting the day with that weighing him down. 

 

“Here,” he laid out the tshirt and jeans on the bed. “You're welcome to all that I have. If this doesn't fit or isn't comfortable, you can help yourself to my bureau and closet.” Daryl nodded and sat himself up on the edge of the bed stiffly.

 

“Thank you. Really… I's sorry I snapped at ya.”

 

Rick sat down next to him, “I shouldn't have pushed. You're in pain, you just woke up-”

 

“Nah, been up for awhile. Jus' didn' want to move. Yer bed is comfy,” his cheeks tinged with a subtle blush.

 

“Definitely more comfortable with someone to share it with,” And he gently leaned toward him, tapping his shoulder to Daryl’s. “Was nice. Just… if my parents ask, I slept in the floor.”

 

Daryl smirked, but Rick caught the worried look that passed over Daryl's eyes.  

 

“I'll let mom know yer joinin’ us for breakfast,” Rick winked at him, and pulled the door closed behind him.

 

 

* * *

 

 

“Where's he gonna go? What can he do? He's too old for foster care, ain't never had a job. He's got no credit, and I don't even know if he's graduating…”  Rick was at the edge of his seat, in a state of nervousness pleading for Daryl before the boy joined them downstairs for breakfast.

 

“Rick, I am not discounting what you are saying, but in the eyes of the law, Daryl is an adult.  That means he gets to make his own decisions, and make his own life.  We can not make him do anything other than provide a safe place for the time being.  But I will not abuse my position, and pull strings, because that is not fair to others.”

 

“That’s a dick move, Dad.  Even for you-”

 

“ _RICHARD SAWYER GRIMES_ , Why I should wash your mouth out with soap!  What has gotten into you this morning.  For shame!  You do not disrespect your father like that, not when we have opened our home and our hearts for that boy…”

 

“Yeah, well, he’s probably not helping him because he’s a _DIXON!_ ”

 

“That’s it,”  Samuel threw his napkin down on the table and stood up quickly, shoving his chair back hard.  “You, me, garage, NOW.”

 

Rick’s eyes grew wide, he knew he was in for it now.  He followed his father sullenly as the man stomped into the garage and slammed the door behind him.  With a voice of calm but filled with vitriol, the man all but spat in Rick’s face.  “If I were a lesser man, I would tan yer hide right here, right now.  But I will not be lowered to the likes of Will Dixon.  As your mother said, we have opened our home to Daryl.  We have provided him with a cell phone.  We have fed him, tended to his wounds, provided what little medical care that _HE_ would allow.  That is a hell of a lot more than I would offer any random person off the street.  I will not let you lower Daryl’s station in life because he shares the unfortunate last name with his father.  That boy deserves respect, safety, and stability in his life.  And he’s probably getting it here for the very first time in his life.”

 

Rick stood there, hand shoved in his pockets, staring down at his feet.  His Dad was right, they had done more for Daryl.  While in his eyes, the boy deserved more, they were at least providing the building blocks for a more solid future.

 

“Now you are going to school today.  And you’re coming home afterwards.  For your poor choice of words and attitude, you will not be leaving this house for anything other than school or errands for your mother between now and when you leave for the Academy.  It’s 3 weeks away, don’t go fuckin’ it up because you decided to acted like a boy instead of the man that I know you to be.”

 

Rick nodded, “Yes, sir.”

 

“You got anything else you want to add to that?”

 

“Yes, sir.  I’m sorry.  I just…”

 

“I get it, Rick. I do.  We’ll do what we can for Daryl, within reason.  He’s an adult. But I’ll ask around and see if I can help get him and a place.  I can’t force him to do anything.”

 

“Thank you.”

 

“Now you go apologize to your mother and give her some sugar.  She don’t deserve the sass you been givin’ her lately.”

 

“Yes, sir.”

 

“Dismissed.”

 

Rick looked up at his Dad with a smirk, “What?”

 

“What?  You might as well get used to it.  Yer gonna be taking orders and following the hierarchy if yer to be a deputy someday.”  Rick dropped his head as his face fell into a sheepish grin, and Sam wound his arm around Rick’s shoulders walking him back into the house, giving his hair a thorough ruffling before taking his place back at the table.

 

Daryl’s eyes, well his one good eye anyway, were wide watching Rick and Samuel come in from the garage.  And he looked at Evelyn, who was pointedly avoiding Rick, and back at Samuel.

 

“Momma?” Rick whispered as he settled into the seat next to her.  

 

Evelyn shook her head, her lips pressed into a thin line, and her eyes watery with tears.

 

“Mom, please?  I’m sorry.  I was wrong…  I’ve been an ass-, I mean.  I’ve been a jerk lately, and I’m sorry.”

 

Evelyn scooped some more scrambled eggs onto Daryl’s plate, along with a piece of toast and more bacon.  She stood up from her seat, and went to stand behind Daryl.  The two of them looked at Rick.

 

“Richard… I accept your apology, but your words were still hurtful.  Until you have children of your own, you’ve no idea what it’s like to see a hurt child.  You’ve no idea what it’s like to lose a child.  Seeing Daryl like this… Jeffrey was taken from us too soon, and you… you’re leaving of your own accord.  And I am so damn proud of you, son.  But just remember that you’ve been in this home for 18 years, and the thought of you not being here puts a fierce ache in this woman’s heart.”  Her hands had settled down onto Daryl’s shoulders, and the boy continued to chew slowly, cheeks tinged with embarrassment at the family dynamics swirling around him.  

 

Rick hopped up from his seat, and wound his arms around his mom.  Kissing her cheek and laying his head against her shoulder as a young child might do.  “You are the best mom, I swear.”

 

As he looked down, he saw Daryl push his plate away from him.  That firm set of his shoulders was back, the boy radiating fear and uncertainty.

 

“Alright now, son. Time for school.  Daryl will not be joining you today, I don’t think he’s well enough yet to go.”  Evelyn reached up to smooth his shirt, and kissed him on the cheek.  

 

“Okay.  Thanks, mom.  Can you guys talk to Daryl about what the plan is next?  I think that may help him know how to plan out the next few days and weeks.”

 

“Yes, Rick, we will.  Go on to school now.”  Samuel folded the newspaper he wasn’t reading, and set it back down on the table.

 

Daryl’s eyes met Rick’s, the uncertainty that showed upon his face was evident.  “I’ll text you later, promise.”  He knew he had some explaining to do, between Daryl certainly bearing witness to Samuel’s loud tirade from the garage, and hearing the exchange between him and Evelyn.

 

“M’kay, go learn something, or… something,” he managed a half smile at least.

 

 

* * *

 

 

“Alright, now Daryl I’m sure you have some questions and we’ll do our best to answer them.  But I just wanted to let you know for the time being you are welcome to stay here.  I see how gingerly you move about, it’s apparent that you will need more time to recuperate.  I don’t want you going to school for at least a week, I’ll clear it with the principal and have your teachers send homework home.  Evelyn will go out this week and get you some of your own clothes.  If you wish to accompany her, that is fine but let me know so we can assign a deputy to follow.  We’ve not been able to locate your Dad, and Merle was hauled in last night for public intoxication.”

 

Daryl had slumped down in his chair.  It twisted his stomach, that his Dad was still out there.  That meant he wasn’t safe.  He knew in his heart that he couldn’t go back home, his father would certainly kill him if he did.

 

“'hat don’ surprise me none, ‘bout Merle….”

 

Samuel sat back in his chair, “Anything you want to ask me?”

 

Daryl hated being put on the spot, but curiosity got the best of him.  “Where’s Rick going in three weeks?  I thought college shit didn' start til like August.”

 

“He and Shane got early admittance to the Police Academy.  It’s an honor to be called up ahead and put on the fastrack.  The school year is almost over, he’ll have two weeks and then he’ll be off to Atlanta for his schooling.”

 

Off to Atlanta, which was still over an hour’s drive away.  But Rick had promised he’d protect Daryl.  How would that happen if he was so far away?  A lot could happen in an hour if he was needed.  And the Grimes’ wouldn’t be putting up with Daryl for long, they would eventually have to leave.  Where would he go, what would he do?

 

“You alright, son?  Yer looking a bit peaked,”  Samuel observed.

 

“Yeah, m’okay.  Just… I dunno, bit tired still.  I guess…”

 

Samuel didn’t believe him, of course, but not in a manner that was negative.  

 

“Daryl, I’m not trying to push you out, but I don’t think it’s safe for you to go home.  Ever.  Now I can pull some strings and get you lined up for a few job interviews once that swelling of your eye has gone down some.  But you’ll not be fit to work until those ribs heal-”

 

“Broken ribs ain’ ever slowed me down-”

 

“Daryl… If you were my son, I would not allow you out of this house until you were fit and able.  But you’re an adult, so I can’t tell you what to do unless it involves the law.  You should not have to work or go to school when you clearly can’t stand for long, and the act of eating a meal wipes you out.”

 

“But-”

 

“This ain’t nothing special, alright?  Yer a decent kid and you dealt a bad hand.  Folks won’t hire ya if they don’t think you can do the job, same as any employer whether or not I recommend ya.”

 

“I’ll pay ya back, fer the phone.  Fer everything, I's promise.”

 

“You won’t.  Pay it forward someday, when you can.”

 

Daryl nodded, and Samuel nodded back once more before getting up from his seat.  “I’m off to work this morning, Evie will be going out later.  You two keep me posted, and we’ll talk more when I get home tonight.  Get some rest, son.”

 

After Samuel left, Daryl excused himself from the table and slunk back to Rick’s room.  He laid down on the bed pulling the blanket up over his head.  He heard Mrs. Grimes soft knock on the door a short while later, but he pretended to be asleep when she entered.  The door clicked softly shut a moment later, but he didn’t miss the post-it she stuck to it.  “Gone to get your clothes, back in one hour.  -E”

 

A short while later, his phone in his pocket buzzed.  

 

_Rick:  Hey_

 

_Daryl:  Hey_

 

_Rick:  My dad wasn’t too pushy, was he?_

 

_Daryl:  No_

 

_Rick:  Okay.  You guys got a plan?_

 

_Daryl:  No_

 

_Rick:  You okay?_

 

_Rick:  Daryl?_

 

_Rick:  Daryl, please answer me?_

 

_Rick:  Fuck school, I’m coming home._

 

_Daryl:  Don’ get yer panties in a wad_

 

_Rick:  I don’t wear panties_

 

_Daryl:  Then stop fussin’ like a girl._

 

_Rick:  I’m not.  I’m just worried about you._

 

_Daryl:  Don’t need to be_

 

_Rick:  Well I am anyway.  Are you mad at me or something?_

 

_Rick:  I’ll take that a yes then?_

 

_Rick:  Alright, well it was nice sharing the bed with you last night_

 

_Daryl:  ’m trying to sleep now, Richard_

 

_Rick:  Fine.  But I’m checking in again later._

 

_Rick:  Okay I’ll let you sleep now_

 

_Daryl:  Stop starin’ at the phone waiting for more texts, ’m sleeping.  Go away._

 

Evelyn came home an hour after she left, as promised.  She had an armload of new clothes for him that she tossed in the wash.  

 

“Just a week’s worth of clothes, my dear.  And a nice winter coat that I picked up at the thrift store.  They’re saying we’re due for a cold winter this year.”  Daryl nodded politely and said a word or two here and there as she fussed around him and the house.  Dusting, and vacuuming, and getting dinner started in the crock pot.  

 

“Richard will be home soon, and I’ll be out of your hair, I promise!”  He gave her a weak smile before laying back down on the couch, blanket pulled up to his chin while he watched some violent and expletive laden movie about two Irish brothers.

 

A nap didn’t seem to be forthcoming, after the movie was over, so he laid there with his eyes shut as his mind whirled.  _Dad is still out there… Merle hauled in for drunkenness… Rick’s leaving in a few weeks… Promised to protect m'… Don’ need no protection… But he promised… How can he help if he’s so far away…  Never felt so safe 'nd secure as I did last night in that bed with him… I don’ need him… I can fend fer myself… Shit I's done it before…  don’ need him…  I's don’t._  


 

 

* * *

 

 

“Daryl… _Daryl_ …. _DARYL_ …” Rick shook the shoulder of the boy whimpering in his sleep on the couch, a sharp intake of breath and suddenly Daryl’s fist met Rick’s face, and he was thrown to the ground.

 

“Ah, goddamit!” Rick groaned from the floor.  

 

“Fuuuuu-” Daryl cried out at the sudden movement, clutching at his ribs his eyes squeezed shut holding back tears of pain.  Rick stayed in place on the floor, a hand over his cheek, and he just watched as Daryl rubbed the heel of his palm against his eyes and groaned out a few times before his breathing settled down.

 

“I’m sorry, Daryl.  I didn’t-”

 

“Not yer fault, was havin’ a nightmare is all.”

 

“That happen often?”  Rick took a chance and joined Daryl on the couch, folding the blanket up and tossing it on the back of the couch.

 

Daryl shook his head, “'t’s been awhile.”

 

“Wanna talk ‘bout it?”

 

“Nope.”

 

“Wanna talk ‘bout what was said this morning?”

 

“Nope.”

 

“Daryl…”

 

“Stop starin’ at me.  M’fine.”

 

“Something is bothering you though…”

 

“It’s just…” he rubbed his hands over his face, and leaned back.  “M' Dad is still out there.  He’s gonna hunt me down eventually.  You said you’d keep me safe, 'nd here you are leaving in a few weeks.  It’s just… It’s dumb.”

 

“It’s… dumb?”

 

Daryl didn’t respond, he just hung his head, his arm slung over his abdomen holding his tender ribs.  Rick sighed, “Go upstairs, I’ll get you some ibuprofen and we’ll talk.”

 

Daryl didn’t argue, and went up.  Rick followed, grabbing a couple of sodas, and some sandwiches that Evelyn had made up extra for Daryl.

 

He put the plate in front of Daryl, popped two ibuprofen into his hand, and handed them to Daryl.  “Take these, eat some food, and we’ll chat.”

 

“Ain’ hungry.”

 

“Daryl, you need to eat, your body needs fuel to rebuild-”

 

Daryl glared at Rick, silencing him.

 

“God yer grouchy today…” Rick muttered to himself.  

 

After the food was eaten, Rick sat down at the chair at his desk, opposite Daryl’s position on the edge of the bed.  

 

“I am leaving in three weeks for the Academy, and I meant it when I said I’d do what I could to protect you.  Same as my Dad.  All you gotta do is ask for help when you  need it.  Last name don’t matter, we all know you’re nothing like the rest of your family.”

 

“Ain’ nothing special.”

 

“No see… that’s where yer wrong,” Rick pinched the bridge of his nose, irritated that Daryl had such a low opinion of himself and that every conversation seemed to be a battle.  He wheeled the chair closer, leaning forward on his knees so he was eye level with Daryl on the bed.  

 

“You may not think you’re anything special, I sure as hell don’t think I’m all that special.  But… yer special to me.”

 

Daryl turned his head away, but he was still listening to Rick.

 

“I want to make the most of the next few weeks, because... even in this incredibly short time that I’ve known you, I don’t want to think about the time that is going to be spent apart.”

 

Daryl frowned, “Me neither.”

 

“I really like you, Daryl.”

 

“Me too…”

 

“No, like… I really like you… Like in a gay for you, way.”

 

Daryl snorted, “My God, Rick.  Do ya' hear yerself talk?”

 

Rick blushed a deep crimson, “I meant… wow, this just got real awkward real fast…”

 

Daryl chuckled, “Ow, laughin’ hurts.  But I know something 'hat is more fun, but don’ hurt damn near as much… unless ya' want it to?”

 

“Huh?” Rick cocked his head to the side, his face the look of pure confusion.

 

“Come a little closer…”

 

Rick scooted his chair over more.

 

“Closer…” Daryl whispered.

 

His knees were between Daryl’s spread legs.  Daryl crooked a finger, motioning for Rick to lean into his space.  Their noses nearly touching, Daryl reached out and took a fistful of Rick’s shirt.  Rick gasped, thinking Daryl was going haul off and hit him again.  But a gentle tug pulled him closer, and he went wide eyed as Daryl’s lips pressed against his.  Rick’s hands slid off his lap, and onto Daryl’s thighs as Daryl deepened the kiss.  Their tongues danced together, and Rick all but melted against Daryl, yet remained mindful of the boy’s injuries.  He winced when Daryl sucked his injured lower lip into his mouth, and Daryl broke the kiss.  

 

“Shit, m’sorry man… I's forgot-”

 

“Shh,” Rick put a finger to Daryl’s lips. “That was… That was worth it.”

 

“Yeah?” Daryl asked.

 

“Mhm, hells yeah,” Rick grinned.

 

 

 

* * *

 

 

“Richard, Daryl, it’s dinner time!”

 

“It’s Rick, woman.  Good God…” Rick muttered to himself as he poured over his homework, finishing up the Calculus problem he was working on.  

 

“But Richard sounds so… distinguished,” Daryl teased.  He lay on his back, on the bed, playing Candy Crush on his phone.

 

“Well, I prefer Rick.”

 

“Some prefer Dick,” Daryl deadpanned.

 

Rick stopped in his tracks processing what Daryl said for a moment, 

 

“Hm, I see what you did there.  Yes.  Richard is better than Dick.  I’ll admit that.  Thank goodness my mother has the good sense to call me Richard or Rick, and didn’t call me Dick for short.”

 

“So ya' don’ like dick?” Daryl teased, putting his phone down and devoting more attention to watching Rick get flustered.

 

“I… I may have one. I know how to use one.  But I’ve never had the opportunity to… have the whole experience with another, if you know what I mean?”

 

“So, yer a virgin then?”

 

“Yes.  You?”

 

“No,” he shook his head.  “But never been with anyone I's cared 'bout.”

 

“Do I want to know what you mean by that?”

 

Daryl’s eyes darkened, and Rick knew that to mean the subject was off limits for now.  But it didn’t stop Rick from wondering just how far Will Dixon had pushed his son, what insidious things had to have happened under his watch, and just how much Daryl has had to contend with over the years.

 

“ _RICHARD! DINNER!_ ” Evelyn hollered one last time from the bottom of the stairs.

 

“ _Richard_ , we best get's a move on or yer mom is gonna have an aneurysm…”

Rick opened the door and gestured for Daryl to pass through.  As he did, Rick reached out touching Daryl’s elbow, the boy stopped in his tracks and looked at Rick, smile spreading across his face.  Rick leaned in, kissing him fully on the mouth, “I’m gonna like doing this.  A lot.”

“Me too,” Daryl blushed.  “Me too…”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 6 is in the works! And we've mapped out the rest of the Part 1 of this series. Lots of exciting stuff coming up. Stay tuned!


	6. Dangerous Man

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's FLTMHASR again (I had to shorten it, really that name is hella long...). This was another fun chapter to write, it may have forced Eleni to laugh a little too hard and almost wake up her family. Hopefully you get a chuckle or two out of it. Enjoy!
> 
>  
> 
> An end of year get-together leads to some interesting developments for our beloved fellas.

“I’m just sayin’, we’ve hardly seen ya since Daryl practically moved in, is all…  Oughtta have one last shindig before we head out and have to get all serious.”

 

“I have to agree with Shane on this one.  You know where we could have it?  Old man Brown passed away a few months back, and his place is empty while his family is duking it out over the estate and probate or whatever that last will and testament stuff is about.  Haven’t seen anyone there in ages. There’s the barn, the pond out back, it’s kinda private…”  Maggie winked salaciously, and turned to Glenn giggling.

 

“I have to say, Maggie has some fantastic ideas.  Our last act as obnoxious teenagers before we join the real world?”  He put his fist out in “all for one, and one for all” fashion.  All he received in response were snickers.  “I’ll bring the pizza?”  That earned him a few cheers and a pat on the back.

 

“I’ll get the beer,” Shane offered.

 

“Dude, don’t get caught!” Rick warned, “You could lose your scholarship.”

 

“Relax man, Dad’s off on another business trip.  He keeps the cooler well stocked, won’t miss a six pack… or three.”  He grinned sheepishly at Rick, running his hand through his hair.  

 

“Beer, yes!” Glenn responded enthusiastically with a fist pumping the air.

 

“Alright, let’s keep it just us then, don’t need the cops ruining our last night of fun.”

 

“Daryl joinin’ us?” Shane asked, taking a sip of his soda and pretending to be nonchalant.

 

“Of course he is, that’s a silly question,” Rick responded.  “Why wouldn’t Daryl be there?  He’s my… he’s my friend too, ya know.  Why is that such an issue for you?”

 

“You wanna take Daryl as yer wing man, be my guest.”

 

Rick rolled his eyes at Shane,  “I don’t need you making any smart ass comments, especially to his face.  His bruises are all healing but he doesn’t need to be told he looks like a yellow man.”

 

“Yeah, cuz in case you didn’t know, that’s racist,” Glenn added.

 

“Didn’t ask you, Chinaman,” Shane retorted with a growl.

 

“For the last time, I’m KOREAN! Do you people not listen?”  Glenn huffed and turned away.

 

“Really, Shane?  Was that necessary?”

 

“Probably not.  Whatever.  So Farmer Brown’s barn then?  We’ll meet there say… 7?”  Shane received nods all around, so everyone went their separate ways to prepare.

 

 

* * *

 

 

“Ain’ goin’,” Daryl huffed.  He sat slumped down in Rick’s desk chair.  His injuries had healed over the past couple of weeks.  He managed to get through graduation without too much difficulty, and was quickly earning hermit status by rarely leaving the Grimes residence for much of anything these days.  Will Dixon was still on the lam, and per Mr. Grimes, Merle didn’t seem to know where the man was either, nor did he seem too concerned.  Daryl had caught sight of Merle at graduation.  He was at the back of the crowd, and raised a hand to wave to him as Daryl had descended the stage with his diploma in hand.  Daryl had hesitated upon seeing Merle, his heart freezing in his chest, but the fact that Merle was smiling at him and not making a scene led him to believe he was sober.  And he was unable to hide his own smile that his big brother was there to see on one of the biggest nights of his life.  Merle may have been a class A douchebag a majority of the time, but Daryl still had a soft spot for his big brother.  

 

“Dar… You’ve barely been out.  And you used to spend so much time outdoors.  You told me yourself how you’d go huntin’ and hikin’ and-”

 

“That weren’t fer fun, Rick.  'hat was ta get away from m' Dad.”

 

“But you liked being outside, right? Come on, I want one last night of fun before Academy.  And I’d really like you to be there.”  He intertwined his fingers with Daryl’s, pulling the man’s hand to his mouth to kiss it.  “Please?” he begged, batting his eyelashes at Daryl and pushing out his lower lip in a pout.

 

“Yer a goddamn pain in m' ass, y' know 'hat?”

 

“Well, we haven’t quite gotten that far yet, but I’m still open for tryin'…” He leaned up and kissed Daryl in that tender spot between his neck and ear causing the man to shiver involuntarily.

 

“We’ll get there eventually man, just chill the fuck out.”

 

“So does that mean you’ll come out with me?”

 

“Come?”  Daryl snickered, “Come on, ya' walked into 'hat one.”

 

“You can come on me if-”

 

“Alright, enough of 'hat.  Yes, I’ll come ta the stupid party with ya'.”

 

“It’s not stupid, it’s a rite of passage, the party to end all parties, the-”

 

“Rick, ya' are so lame.  Ya' talk like it’s 'his grand event.  It’s pizza 'nd beer at a fuckin’ swimmin’ hole with yer buddies.”

 

“It’s all part of the life experience, Daryl.”

 

“I 'hink ya' already been drinking?  Have ya' been sniffin’ yer momma’s bleach?”

 

Rick huffed, and sat back down on his futon.  His parents, none the wiser, had purchased a futon for Rick’s bedroom with the assumption that both boys deserved their own bed, ‘and there was no good reason for Richard to be sleeping on the floor.’  They didn’t know that futon had yet to be used for sleeping.  He and Daryl shared the bed each night. 

 

“So, ya' all packed yet?”  Daryl asked, bringing his thumb to his mouth to nip at his cuticle.

 

“No…”

 

“You leave in two days man…  'nd ya' ain’t like me, everythin’ I own can fit in a backpack.”

 

“What about you though, you ready to move into Dale’s?”

 

Daryl shrugged, “Said the place will be available in a few weeks.  'nd he’s givin’ me a job.  Don’t need to mooch off yer parents no more.”

 

“You know Mom is going to have a hard time when you leave.”

 

“Ain’t like I’m going far.  It’s just an apartment over the store, and he and Irma are the next street over if anything goes wrong.”  Samuel had set up a job interview for Daryl with Dale Horvath.  Dale and his wife Irma owned the local hardware store.  Irma ran the cash register, and Dale tinkered with small engine repairs, and small handyman projects.  Business was booming and he could use an extra set of hands around the store.  Samuel had gone with Daryl and sat with him through the interview, knowing that Daryl had been nervous but never would have openly admitted it.  Dale was charmed by his soft spoken voice and gentle nature, but Samuel ensured Dale that Daryl would come out of his shell eventually, as he had done at the Grimes’ home, and he’d soon be reminding Daryl to ‘watch his language,’ and ‘for the love of God, pick up yer damn cigarette butts.’  Dale had chuckled, and Daryl had blushed at the prideful look on Samuel’s face despite it all.  He knew Daryl was expecting to have been turned down, given the Dixon name and the negative connotations associated with it, but Daryl held his own and Dale chose to make his judgment calls based on his own experiences and not those of others.

 

“Well, be prepared for tears.  She’s a crier.”

 

Daryl picked at the seam of his jeans, “You sure you… You sure this… this is what you want?  Leavin’?”

 

“Hm?”

 

“Nothing, it’s dumb.”

 

“Nothing is dumb, Daryl.  Just talk to me.”

 

“If I could beg ya' to stay, I would.  I's just… have a real hard time knowin' how I’s gonna get through the days withou' ya' here.  I just wish you could live here at home and go to the Academy.  Like commute, er somethin’.”

 

“If it were any city but Atlanta, I would.  I swear it.”

 

Daryl’s chin trembled, “I's really wish you could do it anyway…” he whispered, dipping his head to hide the tears in his eyes.

 

“Hey, I’m always here for you.  Just a phone call away, you know that.  We talked about this.  And Dad still has his people looking for your Dad.  We’re going to find him, and you won’t have to look over your shoulder all the time.”

 

Daryl nodded, running a hand under his nose and sniffling softly.  Rick laid down on the bed next to Daryl, and held his arms open.  “Come here, just lay with me a little while…”  Daryl obliged, curling up next to Rick laying his head over Rick’s heart, listening to the steady thrum.  It never failed to calm him.

 

 

* * *

 

 

The day of the party, Daryl actually woke up in a good mood for once.  He hadn’t needed anything for his pains, and was joking with Rick’s parents and teasing Rick, _Richard_ , in a way that just warmed Rick to his very soul.  This was the Daryl that he loved, and the Daryl he wanted to see every day.  It was the Daryl that he was going to miss the most while he was away at school.  He sat at the table, leaning his elbow on the table, chin propped in his hand just watching Daryl with a goofy grin on his face.  Daryl glanced at him a few times during his chatter with Mr. Grimes, and when the conversation broke and the Grimes’ left the room, Daryl turned to Rick and glared, 

 

“Have I got's somethin' hangin’ outta my nose?  Cuz yer starin’ and it’s pretty obvious.”

 

“Hm,” Rick smiled wider, if that were even possible.  “I love you,” he mouthed.  “I’m sorry, I can’t help it,” these words sounding out audibly.  Daryl froze in place at Rick’s confession.

 

“And I don’t need you to say the words back to me Daryl, unless you feel it and you want to,” he whispered. “I just had to tell you.”

 

“Yer a dork, ya' know that?” Daryl shook his head, feeling fear and annoyance, and unsure of how to respond to Rick.  He didn’t want to ignore what Rick had said, but glossing over it was the best he could do as the notion of love was a new and overwhelming experience for him.

 

 

* * *

 

 

Rick drove the truck down the long winding country roads to Farmer Brown’s estate, the tires kicking up rocks and dust as they wound their way down the dirt path.  Rick reached over taking Daryl’s hand in his own, intertwining their fingers and rubbing his thumb over Daryl’s knuckles.  He loved to do that, to feel the warmth of Daryl’s skin against his own.  He had longed to make their relationship public, to come out to his parents and Shane, but Daryl had asked that it be kept quiet, for now.  With it being the South, folks were not accepting of much that extended beyond traditional heterosexual relationships.  And Daryl didn’t want to risk being seen by his father or one of his ‘associates’ and put Rick at additional risk.  Rick was understanding, to a point, but he still snuck these moments in private to feel connected to his love.

 

Daryl turned and smiled at him before his eyes went back to the road in front of them.  They pulled up behind the barn, and saw Shane’s truck, Glenn’s hatchback, and a vehicle that Rick couldn’t place.  Daryl sat up in his seat, pulling his hand from Rick’s, glaring at the unknown vehicle.  The driver was inside, smoking a cigarette, and Rick caught Daryl swearing under his breath.  

 

“Everything okay?” Rick asked, as he opened his door and slid off the seat.

 

“Yeah, think so…  'hat’s Merle…” got out of the truck, and warily made his way over to the car.  Merle rolled down the window, blowing out his smoke and taking a swig of some off brand whiskey.  “Baby bro!  How the hell are ya?  Ain’t seen ya since… it’s been too long,”  Merle popped up the door and took a step out.

 

“What’re you doin’ here, Merle?”

 

“What?  A man can’t visit with his baby brother?  Been told to stay away from ya by your pal there’s Daddy,” Merle gestured to Rick, who stood protectively close by but far enough away to allow Daryl this conversation in private.

 

“Yeah, well… when a person collapses on their doorstep bleeding and with broken bones, then tend to frown on the assholes that done it.”

 

Merle squinted at Daryl as if he didn’t hear or couldn’t understand what he was saying, “I ain’t done nothin’, but whatever.  You comin’ back home, or-”

 

Daryl shook his head, his hands stuffed deep in his pockets.  “Mm-mm, ain’t plannin’ on it.”

 

“Figured as much.  Daddy ain’t gonna be too happy when he hears that, but I thought I’d bring you an old friend,”  Merle reached into the backseat of the car, and pulled out Daryl’s crossbow.  “Just… don’t tell the old man I brought it to ya.”

 

“You know he’s a wanted man, right?”

 

“Yeah, but when has that ever stopped him from doing what he wants?”  Merle chuckled, taking a long drag from his cigarette.  Daryl stood there, his beloved crossbow in hand, staring at Merle in confusion.  

 

“Do you even know… what he did?” he asked.

 

“Dad?  Cops picked up on his drug trade ‘m guessin’, why?”

 

Daryl realized then that Merle didn’t know what had happened that night.  Merle didn’t know that Will had beaten Daryl nearly senseless, and that that was the reason why Daryl hadn’t been back home.  He only assumed that Daryl was off living somewhere else on account of being now 18 years old and a high school graduate.  

 

“No reason…” Daryl muttered, digging the toe of his boot into the dirt.  “Thanks fer… m’crossbow.  Been missin’ it.”

 

“M’pleasure,”  Merle responded, taking another swig from his bottle.  “So, y’all havin’ a little party here er what?”  He took a few steps over to the cooler sitting on the tailgate of Shane’s truck, and helped himself to a beer.  

 

“Not yer kind of party, Merle.  Folks going off to college and shit, one last shindig.”

 

“Golly,” Merle chortled, popping the tab and sucking down nearly half the can in one long swallow.  “Ain’t that swell?” The mocking tone not to be missed.  By now, Glenn, Maggie, and Shane all stood a ways away watching the conversation go down.  

 

“What’s the deal with this car, dude.  Ain’t yers is it?”

 

“Don’t ask, and I won’t tell,” Merle smiled.  “Which reminds me, I really shouldn’t leave it out in the open like this.  Would be a shame if a bird flew over an’ shit on it er something.”  

 

Merle looked up and down the roadway, and back at the car with a smile.  He dropped back into the seat and pulled the door closed.  He rolled down the windows, and started singing along with some trash 80’s hair band music, and pulled on his seat belt.  

 

“Now I’d hate to be caught drinkin’ an’ drivin’.  So Darylina, here… hold my beer.”  

 

He held the can out the window, and Daryl took it, frowning back at his brother.  Merle revved the engine, stuck a cigarette between his lips, and backed out of the spot.  He pulled out onto the roadway, and Daryl stood watching him as he drove down the road a ways, turned around, and stopped.

 

“What’s he doin’?” Rick asked, appearing at Daryl’s side.  

 

“Fuck if I know,” Daryl responded.  Merle revved the engine fast and hard, then he hit the gas, pedal to the metal.  Rocks and dust from the roadway went flying.  He drove off the road way into the culvert, picking up speed as he went mounting the rise to an adjacent street launching the vehicle into the air and straight into the side of the barn.

 

“Jesus fuckin’ christ!” Daryl took off at a run toward the side of the barn with the vehicle half hanging out.  From inside the barn came Merle’s high pitched cackle.  The crazy mother fucker was inside laughing his fool head off.

 

“Merle?  _MERLE_?  Y’alright in there?  What the ever lovin’ fuck man?”

 

Moments later Glenn, Maggie, and Shane showed up, dripping from having run up from the pond.  

 

“Is that…. Is that Merle?” asked Shane.  Rick nodded, shrugging his shoulders not able to offer any further explanation as to why the man decided to drive the car and launch it into the side of the barn.  Merle emerged from the barn, whiskey bottle in hand and ambled over to Daryl, taking the beer from his hand.  He sucked down the rest of it and threw the bottle back at the barn, smashing it into pieces.

 

“Um, what was 'hat 'bout?” Daryl asked.

 

Merle chuckled again, “Had to hide the vehicle.  Ain’t mine.  As usual things did not go quite accordin’ to my genius plan.  But I did learn somethin’, mind you.  Seat belts and airbags, they are your friends.  You see a cut or bruise on me?  No?  There you have it.”

 

Merle gave them a curt nod, and then sucking his teeth he grinned back at Daryl, “I’ll tell pops you said hi.  Catch you later lil’ bro, I’s got somewheres else to be.”  And away the man walked, down the dirt country road taking the occasional swig of his whiskey bottle.

 

Darly and Rick, and Shane, Maggie, and Glenn stood there dumbfounded, staring after the strange man.

 

“Huh, so that was your brother then?” Glenn asked.

 

Daryl just nodded, “yeah… He uh… He does drugs…”

 

“Interesting…” Glenn shrugged, “Well, remind me not to pick up that habit.  There’s pizza and beer at Shane’s truck.  I’m about to go make a rope swing my bitch.”  Glenn walked off, his hand in Maggie’s, and the two all but ran full sprint down into the pond.  There were large rocks and a hillside, and a rope swing hanging over a thick limb that stuck out over the pond.  Glenn swam to the other side, climbed the rock, and launched himself out over the water letting go and landing with a big splash.

 

“We’re havin’ a bit of a contest, see who can swing out the furthest.  You two come on down, check it out.”

 

“Sure thing, man.  Lemme just grab a bite to eat first, starvin’.”

 

“'hought ya' weren' supposed to swim for 30 minutes after eatin' a meal?” Daryl teased.

 

“I’m sure I can keep myself entertained for 30 minutes after a piece of pizza,” Rick shot back with a grin.  Shane looked between the two with a frown, rolled his eyes and walked back on down the hill to the pond.  The guys grabbed their pizza and a beer each, and Daryl hopped up on the tailgate of Rick’s truck.  They both scarfed their food down quick, and Rick, unable to keep his hands to himself, stood between Daryl’s knees.  

 

“Someone might see,” Daryl frowned.

 

“Mm-mm, Shane’s truck is in the way.  They can’t see us from here.”

 

“Oh…”

 

Rick ran his hands up Daryl’s thighs, his thumbs pressing into the flesh of the inner thighs making Daryl twitch. His hands continued up over his hips, thumbs pressing into the delicious ‘v’ of his abdomen, thumbs hooking into his belt loops and he pulled Daryl forward, their groins nearly touching.  Daryl gasped involuntarily, and Rick looked at him, eyes blazing with want and need.  With one hand on Daryl’s hip, he sent the other up under Daryl’s shirt, rubbing over the flesh of his back before setting up on his chest, rolling a nipple between his thumb and finger.  Daryl swallowed hard and hung his head, “Fuck man…”

 

Rick dipped his head, meeting Daryl’s lips with his own.  Wet hungry kisses, their tongues warring and dancing together, Daryl’s hands in Rick’s hair at the nape of his neck.  Fisting the hair and pulling it to that delicious point that consisted of pleasure and pain.  They pulled apart gasping, their foreheads pressed together.  Rick looked down at the tent in Daryl’s pants and grinned, looking back at Daryl, he couldn’t stop the words,

 

“I think you have a problem.  I think that’s something I could help you with?”

 

Daryl chuckled and blushed crimson, “Ain’t the only one, Grimes…” he growled, gruff and deep, in a way that turned on Rick in ways he had never felt before.  

 

“Oh my god… Daryl… I-”

 

“I know…” Daryl nodded.  “But… not here.”

 

“I got… I got protection,” Rick looked up at Daryl, his face full of innocence and hope and lust.

 

“'Course ya' do, always the boy scout ain’t ya,” Daryl smiled.  “But we’ll need more 'han 'hat.  For this to happen, we need lube.”

 

Rick’s face fell into disappointment, and he looked down at the sad state of his own tented jeans.  “Dammit…”

 

“Shane’s a bit of a man-whore though, ain’t he?”  asked Daryl.

 

Rick looked back up at Daryl, confused.  

 

“Ain’t looking to use his gear, but what do ya' bet he’s got a little somethin’ somethin’ stashed in his glove box?”

 

“Daryl Dixon, yer a goddamn genius,” he grabbed Daryl’s face and pulled him in for a firm kiss, and then ran to the passenger side of Shane’s truck, quietly opening the door hoping not to draw any attention their way.  Grinning when he found what he needed, he ran back to Daryl showing him the prize.

 

“Strawberry flavored, not 'hat we need flavor, per se… but… this’ll work, right?”

 

“Strawberry?  Kinky!” Daryl shook his head, “Come on, they ain’t gonna wait on us all day.”  

 

Together they hustled into the large barn. The sun shown down in slants of light between the aged boards, dust dancing in the light as it was kicked up by their movements across the floor, up the ladder into the hay loft.  Daryl grabbed a couple horse blankets on the way up, and laid them out on a pile of hay.  Rick set the lube down, reached for his belt buckle simultaneously kicking off his boots.  Daryl did the same, his erection bobbing freely as his pants dropped to the floor.  Rick gaped, and did a funky one foot hop as he wrestled off his pants, “yer… yer not wearing underwear?”

 

“Mm-mm, just get’s in the way of stuff… thangs…”

 

“You don’t chafe?”  Rick asked, as he wiggled himself out of his pants completely.

 

“Uh… no.  And this ain’t exactly sexy talk, we doin’ this or what?”

 

“Sorry,” Rick blushed, pulling his shirt over his head.  “So, how we doin’ this?”

 

“Insert A into B, and-”

 

“No, I get how that works… Who’s… top? Who’s bottom?”

 

“What’s yer pleasure?”

 

“Um…” Rick blushed crimson.

 

“Okay, you top,” Daryl reached for the lube, and laid himself down on the blanket.  

 

“Wait, am I supposed to do that? Or-”

 

“Ain’t no rules ‘bout it, Rick,” Daryl smirked, “Do what you want.  If you wanna touch me, then touch me.”

 

“Yeah…” Rick settled down between Daryl’s legs, tossing the condom packet to the side of them.  Daryl sat up and pulled Rick in, kissing him hard and dirty.  He reached a hand out to Rick’s, and pulled it closer wrapping it around his cock, and with little encouragement Rick slowly began to pump his fist up and down.  Daryl groaned against his lips, falling back against the blanket.  Reaching for the lube, he took Rick’s other hand and poured some lube on the fingers.  

 

“One finger at a time.  Like a massage, when it loosens ya' can add more.  Three’s the ticket, then we’re ready,” he whispered.

 

“Okay,” Rick nodded his head enthusiastically.  With Daryl’s cock filling one hand, he reached down with the other and rubbed over Daryl’s entrance.  He watched Daryl the entire time, the way he threw his head back, how his eyelids fluttered, the stuttering rise and fall of his chest as he gasped and moaned.  He reveled in the feel of that tight pucker slowly relaxing for him.  What a sight, to see Daryl splayed out and unencumbered waiting for him.  When he nodded his assent that he was ready, Rick donned the condom and reached for the lube.  With already slick fingers, the bottle shot out of his hands and into the air, nearly smacking him square in the forehead as it came back down.

 

“Sorry,” he chuckled, “bit nervous.”  Applying a liberal amount to himself, he looked to Daryl once again for guidance.  

 

“Line it up, slow and easy, jus' like the fingers…”

 

Rick nodded again, moving into position.  With slow even thrusts, he gained entrance.  Each thrust going a little further until he was fully sheathed.  Rick shuddered above Daryl, nearly overstimulated by the sensation of filling him.  But Daryl saw him struggle to maintain composure, and reaching up he ran a hand down Rick’s cheek.  

“Move with me,” his voice a low growl, and Rick locked eyes with him.  They moved together, Daryl rocking his hips to meet Rick’s with every thrust.  He watched as sweat began to form on Rick’s brow, and as one drip began to fall down his cheek, he leaned up and licked it.  Rick gasped and thrust harder, and Daryl bit his cheek to keep from crying out.  He put a finger to Rick’s lips, and with his free hand, he grasped his cock and pumped in time with Rick’s motions.  Smooth liquid motions gave way to stuttered frantic pumping, and with a groan Rick came.  Daryl followed soon after, his fist giving way to his completion.  Rick collapsed to the side of him, sweaty and panting, his face in a wide toothy grin.

 

“Oh my God, Daryl… that was…”

 

“'hat was somethin' alright,” Daryl agreed, smiling back at him, and wiping off the come from his body.

 

“Is it always like that?” he asked.

 

“Rushed?  'nd while trespassing in someone’s barn?  No…”

 

“No, I mean… the…  there’s a name for it. I can’t think of it right now.  The euphoria?”

 

“If yer tryin' ta say it felt good, 'nd the earth moved for you, then yeah… 'hat’s kinda the point.”

 

“Was it good for you?”

 

“You saw… ‘course it was.”

 

Rick chuckled as he pulled off the condom and tossed it aside.

 

“Next time though, we’ll plan ahead.  Take our time, whole nine yards.”

 

“Chocolate covered strawberries and champagne?”

 

“No, you twat,” Daryl laughed throwing his shirt at Rick.  “'his was good, but trust me… next time will be better.”

“Alright…. Should probably get back out there before someone comes lookin’.”

 

“You go, I’ll clean up.  Be down in a jiffy.”

 

Rick headed down the ladder and out the barn door, and down the path to the pond.  Glenn was taking another swing out over the pond, landing in what looked to be a belly flop.  Rick cringed,  “Oooh, that’s gotta hurt!” he chuckled to himself.

 

“Hey,” Shane called out, “Where’s Daryl?”

 

Rick looked back up at the barn and back at Shane with a smile, “Don’t worry, he’s… comin’.”  He shucked off his shirt and pants, and ran into the pond with just his boxers. On.

 

“Do I smell strawberries?” Shane asked, as he followed Rick into the water.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Inspiration for Merle's driving was taken from this image:
> 
> http://funigy.com/img/0216/i-bet-you-cant-jump-the-barn-hold-my-beer.jpg
> 
> Up next, a hard goodbye... Rick leaves for the Academy, and Daryl struggles to keep it together. It's not going to be a pretty chapter. :(
> 
> So tell us, how are you guys enjoying this story so far?


	7. Lover in the Storm

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Daryl and Rick share one last night together before he leaves for the Academy.

Evelyn Grimes stood in her kitchen watching the pots simmering on the stove top, filling the home with delicious smells.  She had gone out of her way to create Rick’s favorite meal for his last night at home before leaving for the Academy, lemon pepper catfish, smashed taters, and french style green beans.  In the oven, a peach cobbler was baking.  She couldn’t help the tears that escaped her eyes, on this, her only son’s last night at home.  She knew he would be home on some weekends to visit, and holidays, but having seen him grow up so quickly before her eyes, he was leaving her little boy… but he would be coming back a man.  

 

At the sound of the front door opening and closing, she ran her fingers beneath her eyes, wiping her hands on her apron and plastering on her best brave smile.  She could hear the chatter of her two boys, Rick and Daryl coming in from wherever they had run off to that afternoon.  Rick had mentioned needing various items to finish off his packing, but really she knew the two of them were just having their last bit of summer fun before Rick left the next day, and Daryl started his new job with Dale at Horvath Hardware.

 

“Mom?” Rick called, as he shucked off his shoes near the front door.

 

“Yes, honey?”

 

“Are you cooking my catfish?”

 

He came around the corner into the kitchen with Daryl right behind him.  Rick’s mouth going wide with a grin at the sight of Evelyn’s masterful cooking.  

 

“Darn tootin’!  I can’t send my boy off to the Academy without givin’ him the best of his momma’s cookin’!”

 

“And… do I smell-”

 

“You betcha, peach cobbler too.  With vanilla ice cream to dollop on top!”

 

“Yer the best, Momma!”  Rick kissed her on the cheek and reached into the refrigerator grabbing two sodas.  Daryl blushed at the display of affection, he still find out hard to get used to, having come from a home where there was no affection, no love.

 

“Gonna go finish packin’, you’ll call when dinner is ready?”

 

“Twenty minutes, Richard, give or take.”

 

Rick pushed Daryl back through the doorway and they tumbled up the stairs to Rick’s room.  Daryl went in and sat on Rick’s bed, Rick shutting the door behind him.  Rick’s room was in a fair amount of disarray, he had a large duffle bag and a few crates of various items in the corner near his door.  His bureau having been ravaged for all his good clothes, the drawers left open and the contents askew.  The closet was nearly half empty, but all Daryl saw were bare spots vacated by Rick.  He felt empty already, and Rick was still here.  He brought his thumb to his mouth, chewing on the cuticle, not watching as Rick packed away the last of his toiletries.  

 

Rick appeared in front of him, a warm hand on his wrist gently pushing his hand from his mouth.  He kneeled down in front of Daryl, shuffling forward between his legs, and looked into those blue eyes he loved so much.   

 

“You have no idea how much I’m gonna miss you, Daryl Dixon,” he sighed, kissing Daryl’s hand that he had just been gnawing on moments earlier.  He pushed the hair off Daryl’s face so he could see those brilliant denim blue eyes.  They were one of Daryl’s best features, and by far Rick’s favorite. Followed second by Daryl’s lips, which he kissed so delicately and reverently.  “I’m gonna miss kissin’ you anytime I want.  And I’m not looking forward to go to bed alone…”

 

Daryl leaned his forehead against Rick’s, and squeezed his eyes shut.  “I don’ know how I’s goin’ to face the day without ya’ here.  God ‘m so damn weak…”

 

“Yer not, Daryl.  You’re one of the strongest people I know, and I know that is incredibly cliche, but it’s true.”

 

“Jus’ gonna pick up as many hours as I can at Dale’s, make the days pass a bit faster until I see ya’ again.”

 

“Just don’t burn yourself out, gonna need to save some of that energy for when we see each other again,” Rick sighed, kissing Daryl again but with more passion.  Daryl groaned against his lips, and scoffed, “Careful, Richard.  Yer momma is gonna be callin’ us fer dinner soon.”

 

Rick sighed, and sat back on his heels.  “And just like that, mood killed…” he was teasing of course, but he didn’t miss the dash of hurt in Daryl’s eyes.  “I’m always, ALWAYS in the mood for you Daryl.  And yer right, she-”

 

“Daryl, Richard… come on down for dinner, boys!” Evelyn hollered from the bottom of the stairs. Daryl smiled in response, and tipped his head toward the door.  

 

“Alright, come on then… let’s go eat my last meal.”

 

“Poor choice of words, man,” Daryl grumbled, as he walked past Rick out of the room and down the stairs.

 

 

* * *

 

Daryl flopped down in his seat quite unenthusiastically avoiding eye contact with Rick.  Rick sat down across the table from Daryl, schooling his own face so as to not draw attention from his parents.  Daryl was prone to moodiness and they never questioned it.  But Rick was a different story.  He wanted this dinner to be positive, as he knew his mom was sad that he was leaving for school.  And his dad, the same, even if he was excited that Rick was following in his footsteps.  Samuel sat at the head of the table, and Evelyn took her seat at the opposite end after placing all the dishes of food on the table.  She smiled at Rick and handed him the plate of catfish to get the food moving along.  He passed to his Dad, who passed to Daryl.  Samuel and Evelyn made comments on their day, the usual idle chit chat that graced the dinner table at night.  And they settled on more specific topics including Rick and the Academy.

 

“You all packed and ready to go, son?” asked Samuel, helping himself to more mashed potatoes.

 

Rick nodded, “Mm-hm, Shane’s gonna pick me up tomorrow and we’ll load everything in his truck.”

 

“You sure you don’t want to ride in with Mom and me?” he teased lightly.

 

“Dad,” Rick whined.  “I told you guys, me and Shane are riding in together.  We’ll get registered and into our dorm rooms.  You guys can help us unpack if you want, we’ll tour the campus, and then we can go to lunch in the city.”

 

Samuel put his hands up in mock surrender, “You know your momma has no qualms about holding your hand, son.  Help you be brave.”

 

“Now I love my momma, but no cop worth a lick is goin’ to be thinkin’ ‘bout holdin’ his momma’s hand while he’s makin’ arrests, or stoppin’ a bank robbery, or… whatever.”

 

“Samuel,” Evelyn warned.  “So, Daryl… Tomorrow’s a big day for you too, right, sweetheart?  I saw Mr. Horvath in town today, and he’s absolutely tickled that you’re going to be helping him out.  He’s got a whole list of items tha’ need tendin’ to, perfect for you to get started on.”

 

“Yes, m’am,” Daryl replied quietly.  “He’s got me startin’ part-time, but says he’ll bump me to full-time once he knows I can handle what he throws at me.”

 

“I’m sure you’ll do just fine, honey.  Now if you need anything while we’re out, you got mine and Samuel’s phone numbers.  Don’t you hesitate to call or text.  Think about what you’d like to have for dinner tomorrow, we’ll cook you up somethin’ special to celebrate your first day.”

 

“But… tomorrow is Rick’s special day,” Daryl’s hands abandoned his silverware on his plate of half eaten food.  “‘nd you’ll be gone most of the day.  Ain’t no bother, ’m fine with leftovers.”

 

“Nonsense, just tell me what you like and I’ll be sure to make it.”

 

Daryl thought about all the things he had eaten since coming to the Grimes’ home.  It sure as hell beat the cold cheese sandwiches, the wood fire cooked squirrel and possum, and three day old pizza that he had to eat at home.  Evelyn always had a hot meal prepared for dinner every night.  His lunches were always wholesome sandwiches loaded with meats and cheese and fresh vegetables.  Breakfast, she never served cold cereal.  No, it was pancakes and bacon, sausage and eggs, the kinds of foods that would ‘stick to your ribs’ so you wouldn’t go hungry before lunch time.  There was not a meal that she had served him that he didn’t relish.  It was overwhelming all the choices, and his head swam.  And now all three of them were staring at him, awaiting a response.  He loathed being put on the spot like that.  Sweat began to form on his brow, and his hands began to tremble.  He closed his eyes a moment, and then looking directly at Evelyn, “May I be excused?  I… I’m not feelin’ so well all the sudden.”

 

“Oh certainly, you need me to get you anythin’, honey?  Are you gettin’ one of them headaches?”

 

Daryl got up and pushed his chair in, “I think so.  ’m just… I’m goin’ to go lay down for a bit.”

 

Rick’s eyes followed Daryl as he left the room.  “Well, I hope the boy is okay,” Evelyn said softly as she picked up Daryl’s plate and went to cover it with some plastic wrap.  

 

“I’m sure he’s fine, Evelyn,” Samuel commented.  “Perhaps he’s just a bit nervous about his first day on the job tomorrow.  How ‘bout you, RIck?  Any… apprehension?  Got any questions for me?  What to expect and whatnot?”

 

Rick had sat back in his seat having abandoned what was left on his place, concerned for Daryl.  “No, sir.  I think… Well, things are different these days than when you went to the Academy.  I’ve read the guide book, the website, and the welcome packet like a dozen times.  I’m good to go.”

 

“Alright, then,” he smiled.  Evelyn cleared the plates and brought her men their warm peach cobbler topped with a rich vanilla ice cream.  Rick hummed happily as he took his first mouthful.  He wished Daryl was there to enjoy it with him, he knew Daryl had a penchant for sweets, and his momma’s cobbler was some of the best in the county.

 

After dessert was finished, Samuel sat back in his chair rubbing his stomach and looking quite content.  Evelyn began cleaning up the meal, and they both watched as she fluttered about the kitchen.  “Will you excuse us, Evie?  Rick and I are going to go have some guy talk in the garage.”

 

“Of course, sweetheart!”  She gave Sam a knowing look, and bent down to give Rick a kiss on the cheek.  “I’ll go bring a plate up to Dar-”

 

“No,” Rick jumped.  “It’s okay, Mom.  I’ll bring his plate up after I talk with Dad.  Let’s give him a little while to rest.  I’m sure I wore him out dragging him all over this afternoon.”

 

“Sure thing, sweetie,”  she gave him a side hug, and went back to tending to the kitchen.  Rick followed Samuel into the garage. 

 

“Sit down, son.  We gotta talk,” Sam said.  Rick took a seat on a stool by the work bench, while Samuel leaned back against the shelving opposite him, with his arms folded over his chest.  He squinted his eyes and pursed his lips a moment, while staring at Rick.

 

“Dad?” Rick asked after a few moments.  “You got somethin’ to say to me?”

 

“Was just puttin’ my thoughts in order is all…  Was just thinkin’ about you, when you were a towheaded toddler.  You were such a stubborn lil’ thing.  Always wantin’ to do things yer way, on yer own time, not needin’ no help from anybody.  And then you grew up to be a smarty-pants ‘all-knowing’ teenager,” he included his fingers for air quotes.  “And now… here you are.  A high school graduate.  My own son, a grown man, going off to further his education and become a valuable member of our local law enforcement.”

 

Rick blushed a little, and ran his hands over his thighs a few times, realizing they had begun to sweat.  The last time they had been in the garage, Samuel had ripped into him about his behavior.  And here he was singing his praises.

 

“But I got a question for you.  Why this?”

 

“Well… it’s my life, and I’ll do what I want with it.”

 

Samuel chuckled at Rick’s statement, “I used to be a lot like you.  I remember turnin’ 18.  Becoming an adult.  Thinkin’ I was… bulletproof.  The whole world was out there just waitin’ for me, and I was goin’ to conquer it one step at a time.  There were good days and bad days, and hard lessons learned.”

 

Rick had to fight the urge to roll his eyes, almost certain this was going to be another one of those parental tirades where they try to impart their wisdom on the younger generation.

 

“Just humor your old man, Richard.  Here’s a few simple rules that my Daddy told me, and they helped me in more ways than you can imagine.” Samuel smiled at Rick, a gentle smile tinged with… sadness?  Experience?  It was enough to keep Rick’s rapt attention.

 

“One,” he held up a finger.  “Stand tall when you stumble.  Because it’s bound to happen.  Two.  Stand proud when you’ve been humbled.  Why?  That leads me to Three.  The lessons you learn in life will not be the ones you plan.  But I promise you, that every step up that mountain of life will be more than worth countin’.”  He paused a moment letting it sink in.  “And when you walk through the valley, make you walk like a man.” 

 

Rick sat transfixed listening to every word.  “I know I’ve said it already, but I’m proud of you, son.  Getting that early admission to the Academy, keepin’ your grades up and working doubly hard to graduate early, that’s not something just anybody can do.  You keep that same mind set through Academy, and the world will be at your feet.”

 

Samuel took the few steps toward his son, and stuck his hand out.  Rick gripped it tight with a smile spreading across his face, and Samuel pulled him in for a long tight hug.  “Yer momma and I are gonna miss you somethin’ fierce.  You come home as often as you like, we’d rather have a homesick boy to coddle than not see you until Christmas.”

 

“What was all that talk about being a man for then?” teased Rick, as Samuel walked him back inside with his arm around him.  “Someday you’re going to be a father, Rick.  Many years from now, AFTER Academy, and AFTER you’ve found secure and gainful employment.  And then, you will understand how one minute we expect the world of you, and the next we want nothing more than to keep you in our loving arms for eternity.  A parent’s time with their child is woefully short.”

 

Samuel gave Rick a pat on the back before grabbing the newspaper from the table and retiring to his recliner in the den.  Evelyn pulled Daryl’s plate from the microwave, and set it on a tray along with a couple ibuprofen and a bottle of water.  

 

“I’ll bring it up to him, Mom,” Rick offered, holding his hands out for the tray.  

 

“Don’t you boys stay up too late tonight, y’both have a big day tomorrow.”

 

“Yes, ma’am,” Rick answered with a smile, taking the tray and heading upstairs.  The door to his room was thankfully left ajar, so he didn’t have to fight with the knob and balancing the tray.  Daryl was sitting in his desk chair, leaning forward with his elbows on his knees, head hung.  He didn’t move when Rick came in and put the tray on the desk next to him, or when Rick sat down on the bed nearby.  

 

Rick waited quietly, hoping the boy would acknowledge he was there, or at least make some sort of movement indicating he was there with him.

 

“Dar… what's going on?” Rick asked, unable to wait any longer.

 

Daryl shook his head and sniffled. Rick got down on his knees and inched forward until he was in Daryl’s space.  With two hands gently cupping his face, he leaned in placing tender kisses along Daryl's jaw, ghosting over his lips teasing a response out of him.  With a whine, Daryl pulled back upright and pulled Rick into a big hug, burying his face in his neck.  And Rick held him while he trembled, and didn't question the growing wet spot on his shoulder. His own eyes burned knowing how much he already missed Daryl, and having provided Daryl with the first stability of his life, he could only imagine how much harder this must be on him.

 

In an attempt to assuage some of the pain, he spoke softly to him.  “We got FaceTime on our phones, so we'll get to see each other.  And texting. I mean, during the day maybe hard with classes and stuff but at night I can probably talk.  It's not the same, I know, but… I'll be back for long weekends and stuff.”

 

Daryl was limp in Rick’s arms, his hands fisted into the back of Rick's shirt.  

 

“My parents are happy to have you here, you’ll be a great distraction for them…” he offered.

 

“Ain't gonna be here long.”

 

“Dad already said you could stay, you ain't gotta take Dale's apartment.  With yer Dad still out there, you might be better off-”

 

 

“Can we not talk ‘bout him!  I don' want our last night being a rehash of all the shit I don' want to think about.”

 

Rick sat back on his heels, “alright, why don't you eat and then we can go watch a movie downstairs or something.”

 

Daryl picked at his plate while Rick brought his things downstairs and set them by the door.  Daryl soon followed bringing his dishes back to the kitchen.  Taking Rick’s hand in his own, he led them into the living room and picked a movie out of the vast array of DVD’s that Rick had accumulated.  He popped it in the player, and sat down next to Rick on the couch, “Let’s just have us a regular night.  ‘hat’s about all I can handle right now.”  They sat shoulder to shoulder, knee to knee on the couch.  As the movie played, Rick slung his arm over Daryl’s shoulder, and he curled himself into Rick's body.  And they held each other close straight through the credits and until the welcome screen popped back up on the tv.

 

The house was dark indicating his parents had gone off to bed at some point, it was just the two of them sitting in the dark.  Daryl turned his face up to Rick's, his blue eyes pleading for something that Rick couldn't quite name.  But as Daryl’s lips parted, Rick kissed him.  His hands running through the tangle of Daryl's hair as the boy moved to straddle his lap.  Hands wandered, and hips collided in delicious friction.  Shirts were removed, and Daryl bent down taking Rick's nipple between his teeth, nipping and sucking at the sensitive node as Rick hissed and ground his hips upward.

 

Rick's hands ran over the broad expanse of Daryl's shoulders, and down his back, grazing over the scars that lay there and dipping down into the back of Daryl's pants.  He moved to cup Daryl's ass with his hands, spreading the cheeks apart and letting his fingers wander to the sensitive pucker.  Daryl gasped at the feel of the pressure, and ground down against Rick's fingers, welcoming the stinging stretch.  Their hips rocked together, erection rubbing against erection, breaths coming in hot panting gasps.

 

“Upstairs, now… I can't see explaining come stains on my parents leather couch,” Rick whispered.  Daryl dismounted, and gripping Rick's hand, dragged him up the stairs to Rick's room.  The door shut behind him, and Rick was never so great full in his life for his parents bedroom being downstairs on the other side of the house.

 

“We still need to keep quiet,” he whispered, as Daryl attacked his face, and began tugging at the button of Rick's jeans.  Unzipped, he shoved them down Rick's legs, pushing him back onto the bed kicking off his own pants.   His erection standing out tall and proud, straddling Rick's hips once more, he kissed and sucked at Rick's neck, nibbling on his ear lobe and panting into his ear as Rick's fingers resumed their exploration of Daryl's backside.  With a free hand he fumbled through the drawer of his bedside table, pulling out a small bottle of lube and set to preparing Daryl properly.  Daryl keened and whined softly above him, pushing himself back against Rick's fingers. 

 

He kissed Rick’s mouth, their tongues gliding against each other and when Daryl could take no more, he grabbed the condom packet himself, sheathed Rick and poised himself above him.  With some maneuvering, he sat astride Rick lowering himself onto his cock.  After a few timid moves of his hips, he found a position and speed that worked for them both, and together their bodies moved in unison.  Rick sat up to run his arms around Daryl, kissing across his chest and nuzzling into the sparse hair.  Sweat began to drip off of Daryl with his efforts, and Rick pushed the damp bangs from Daryl's forehead.

 

“You're my love, Daryl,” he gasped, reaching between them to run his fist up and down Daryl's cock.

 

“‘nd you're mine.  Always,” he responded, dipping to kiss Rick's lips, grunting with every thrust from Rick below him.  The familiar pleasure coiling low in his belly filling him with delicious heat, and in a burst of light he came.  Rick followed several thrusts later, and they clung to each other once more as they came back down.   

 

Rick laid Daryl down and withdrew from him, removing the condom and tossing it aside, their arms and legs mingled as they lay facing each other. They stared into each other’s eyes, Rick kissing the scarred knuckles of Daryl’s hands, and Daryl combing his fingers through the curls at the nape of Rick’s neck.

 

“’m gonna miss you,” he swallowed hard, his eyebrows furrowing into a frown.  “I miss everything ‘bout you…”

 

“Dar, I’m still right here,”  Rick responded, pulling him closer.  “I’m still here…”  Daryl cuddled into Rick’s body, his head on Rick’s chest listening to the steady beat.  He soon drifted off to sleep.  Hours later, Rick lay there still awake.  Unable to sleep, partly due to excitement about his future, and partly his worry about Daryl.  The clinging, the tears, this was quite unlike his usual demeanor, and Rick had to wonder how well he’d do without him there.  After Daryl had rolled over and faced the wall, Rick slipped from the bed.  Pulling Daryl’s phone from the pocket of his pants, he scrolled through the contacts, what few there were, and entered some of the phone numbers into his own phone.  Most notably, Daryl’s brother Merle.  And he made a point of adding Glenn and Maggie into Daryl’s phone.  He knew the couple would befriend Daryl and keep in touch with him.  Glenn was a good decent guy that cared about everybody, and Maggie, the fierce spitfire she was had a heart of gold and she’d see to it as well that Daryl was doing okay.  While his physical injuries had healed, there was still the emotional impact raging behind those amazing blue eyes.

 

Daryl began to stir, and whimpered in his sleep, so Rick put the phones back on their chargers and slipped back between the sheets, pulling Daryl into his chest and holding him snug. And soon, he too fell asleep.

 

 

* * *

 

Morning greeted Rick with the sight of a shower wet Daryl wearing nothing but a towel standing by the closet pulling out his clothes for the day.  He watched as the muscles moved beneath Daryl’s skin when he reached for a shirt and pulled it on over his head.  His hair still dripped, and he ran fingers through them neatening the haphazard mop.  He dropped his towel and pulled on his boxer briefs and jeans, and when he turned, he jumped at the sight of Rick watching him.

 

“Jesus, dude…”

 

“Sorry, I was just enjoying the view,” Rick smiled.  

 

“Just gettin’ ready, first day at Dale’s ‘nd all.”

 

“I see you’ve gone formal, you’re not going commando.”

 

“Thought I’d pretend to be a valued ‘nd model citizen.  Try to be what one of you people classify as ‘normal,’ whatever the fuck that is.”

 

“Just mind yer tongue, pick up your cigarette butts, and do what Dale asks.”

 

“Ain’t stupid Rick, this ain’t my first rodeo…”

 

“That’s not… that’s not what I was implying, Dar,” Rick pushed back the sheets climbing out of bed, wiping the sleep from his eyes.  “I’m sorry, I was just trying to help.”  He walked over to Daryl, leaning in to press a kiss to his lips, and grabbed his clothes.  “M’gonna go shower, meet you downstairs for breakfast.  Shane will be here in an hour.”

 

“I’ll be gone b’fore then.  Shift starts in an hour.”

 

“Oh…”

 

“Go shower, man.  You stink like sex,” Daryl gave Rick a gentle shove.  Rick smiled at him as he backed out the door, “‘nd I can’t wait until we can do ‘hat again.”  

 

Daryl smiled back at him as best he could.  He wasn’t ready to say goodbye to Rick.  He tried to keep his emotions in check, but they were roiling inside of him.  He didn’t want things to go back to the way they used to be, and he felt there was nowhere else for him to go but down.  To say he was grateful to the Grimes and their hospitality was a gross misstatement, but he had to wonder how long the good was going to last.  He flopped down on the bed, and threw an arm over his face willing away the day for just a few moments, trying to find some inner peace.

 

Rick popped back in the room, dressed and ready for his departure.  He pulled Daryl up to standing and pulled him into his arms.  “I can’t give you the long drawn out sappy goodbye that I want to, so I’m gonna say goodbye here and now while I can.”

 

Daryl tipped his forehead down against Rick’s shoulder, he couldn’t look Rick in the face for this.  “I love you, Daryl Dixon.  And if I could take me with you, I would.  I’ve not had you in my life long, but there’s not a minute that goes by where I’m not thinkin’ of you.  I wanna see you on every weekend I come home, on every break.  I wanna talk with you every day if I can.  I wanna facetime you, so I can see yer eyes…” He pulled Daryl’s face up to meet his, “This hurts, man…” Rick’s own eyes going red rimmed with tears, and he sniffled.  “I’m gonna miss you so bad.  You gotta stay in touch with me so I know yer okay, you got that?”

 

Daryl’s chin trembled and he nodded, a tear slipping down his cheek as he looked away.  

 

“Don’t you fade away on me, Dar.  Don’t you fade away…”  Rick pulled Daryl tight to his chest, swaying side to side as the boy shook in his arms.  

 

“Richard, Daryl… breakfast is ready,” Evelyn called from the bottom of the stairs.  

 

“Be there in a minute, Mom,” Rick called back, not letting Daryl go.  “I love you,” he whispered in Daryl’s ear.  “Always.  Ain’t just sayin’ that.  You’re forever for me.  You’re it, Daryl.  You’re the one.”

 

He pulled back enough to look Daryl square in the eye, “You’re the one.”  And he kissed him on the lips, one last time before they broke apart, wiped their eyes, and made their way down to breakfast.

 

 

* * *

 

 

“Now Daryl, we’ll drop you off at Dale’s on our way out.  Rick, you’re still ridin’ in with Shane, right?” Samuel was drinking his coffee and planning out the day’s events.

 

“Yes, Dad.”

 

“Now Daryl, I’ve got deputies making extra rounds near the hardware store.  Evelyn or I will be pick you up after shift, and bring you back here.”

 

“It’s no bother, Mr. Grimes.  Really-”

 

“Just call me Samuel.  Why can’t anyone in this family call folks by their wanted name?”

 

“I’ve wondered myself,” Rick grumbled.

 

“Richard, honestly…,” Evelyn spoke up.  Rick gave a pointed look at his father, who rolled his eyes.  “I expected you to be more excited for the day, and look at you just movin’ food around on your plate.  You’ll be hungry in an hour, young man, if you don’t eat a good breakfast.”

 

“So, Daryl-”

 

“My bike runs, I can get myself to Dale’s.  Ain’t far.”

 

“No, Daryl, let Dad drop you-”

 

“No, really… I gotta start fendin’ for myself.  I can’t rely on folks forever, gots ta make my own way in the world now.  Ain’t gonna go livin’ in fear of my old man hidin’ in the shadows. I just wanna live my life.  I don’t think that’s too much to ask,”  Daryl eyed Rick, and Samuel before turning his attention back to his plate.

 

“I don’t like this, but if that’s what you want Daryl-”

 

“It is,” Daryl interrupted.  “May I be excused, sir?”

 

Samuel stared at Daryl a moment, and nodded his assent and Daryl cleared his plate placing it gently in the sink.  

 

“If y’all don’t mind, I’ll take my leave now.  Want to get an early start at Dale’s…”

 

Evelyn hopped up from her seat, “Hold on a second…” She pulled a sizeable insulated lunch box from the fridge and handed it to Daryl, kissing him on the cheek.  “You have a good first day, honey.  I packed you lunch and snacks for your break times, and there’s water and soda so you don’t get thirsty, and-”

 

“Thank you, Mrs. Grimes,” he put his hand over hers on the lunch box, taking it from her.  “Much appreciated, m’am.”

 

Mrs. Grimes teared up, and reached out to cup Daryl’s chin.  “You have a good first day, I can’t wait to hear all about it after we get back from droppin’ Richard at school.”

 

“Yes’m,” Daryl gave her his best painted on smile, “Good luck to ya, Rick.  Hope… hope it all works out well fer ya.”  He raised up a hand to wave to them all, turned, and walked out.  Rick stared longingly after him, feeling rather defeated that that was there ‘goodbye.’  Turning back round to his plate, he picked at his food, did his best to smile and respond to his parents when spoken too, but inside, his heart was breaking.  And it shattered completely as he heard the motorcycle roar to life, and fade away as Daryl drove down the road and away from him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Things are taking a twist toward the dark side. I'm writing chapter 8 right now, and chatting with Eleni about the chapters to come. We have spent hours upon hours discussing the storyline, the characters, their actions, what they would say, etc. It has been an amazing journey thus far, and I can't wait for you all to see where it ends up!


	8. The Silent Secrets

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Daryl experiences life without Rick's companionship, and finds it increasingly frustrated. Will makes a reappearance, and it does not go well. Everyone is at increased risk, which sends Daryl on a wild downward spiral with an array of emotion running the gamut between love and hate.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Folks, I have for you a whopper of a chapter. It's just under 7,000 words. Yes, my fingers kind of went haywire on me and oh my gosh... As usual, Eleni and I spent a lot of time discussing the details of these chapters, planning what's coming ahead. This chapter gets pretty intense. Be prepared for Dixon mouth, abusive language, and violence. It's not pretty. Go forth, and enjoy it (even if perversely).

 

Two weeks had passed since Rick had left for Atlanta.  And in those two weeks, Daryl filled his days with working for Dale.  He proved to be far handier than Dale had hoped, and was given the opportunity pick up the odd job or two here and there, and was told to set a rate and the funds would be his.  No splitting it with Dale.  Daryl was thankful for the extra work, and the welcomed distraction from missing Rick.  

 

They spoke as often as Rick was able, which was not often at all.  More often than not, Daryl would send a few texts to Rick at the end of the day, and Rick wasn’t able to respond until the wee hours of the morning before he started his physical training.  His days were filled with classes, the evenings with more physical training and camaraderie with his classmates, and it was often rather late at night before he was able to get away to talk with Daryl.  By then, Daryl was already asleep.  Rick’s weekends soon became filled with volunteer work, odd jobs, or studying for his classes.  Daryl suspected this would happen, and he tried hard to remind himself that it wasn’t Rick’s fault.  But nonetheless, it hurt.

 

Evelyn and Samuel, they too were frustrated with not being able to talk to their son as often as they would like, but they were more understanding as adults often were.  Evelyn fussed over Daryl, and Daryl tolerated it as best he could, but even he grew tired of the attention and often disappeared to his room after dinner, foregoing watching television with the elder Grimes.

 

_10:40 p.m._

_Rick:  I miss you._

_Rick:  Are you there?_

_Rick:  This isn’t turning out the way I thought.  I’m sorry.  Maybe I’ll catch you in the morning.  ILY_

 

Daryl eyed the text messages, but didn’t respond.  He rolled over, and closed his eyes, trying his best to grab hold of the sleep that eluded him of late.

 

_5:47 a.m._

_Rick:  Are you awake?_

_Rick:  It’s probably too early, sorry._

_Rick:  Have a good day, I’ll try calling the house tonight._

 

_7:03 a.m._

_Daryl:  Yer mom said hi, she’ll be waiting on yer call tonight._

 

_9:33 a.m._

_Rick:  I hope to talk to you too Dar_

_Daryl:  Won’t be round, helping Mr Greene load hay until sundown_

_Rick: oh. Ok.  ILY_

 

_7:17 p.m._

_Rick:  Daryl?  Call me, please?  I’ll be in most of the night tonight. Ain’t goin out._

 

_8:43 p.m._

_Daryl:  I called three times, you never answered.  I see how it is._

 

_10:57 p.m._

_Rick:  I’m sorry, again.  Shane challenged us to sprints, then I lost track of time at the shooting range._

_Rick:  ILY_

 

Reading Rick’s texts in the morning only served to make Daryl more angry, and to miss Rick that much more, which only made him angrier and sullen.  It was a vicious cycle that he had fallen into.  Evelyn now eyed Daryl in the morning with a look of concern, and Daryl gave Samuel clipped one worded answers.  He tried his best to be polite, but his patience for dealing with all things Grimes was wearing thin.

 

Being a rainy day, Daryl allowed Evelyn to drop him off at work.  And he set to the given task of restocking the pet food, and reorganizing the gardening tools.  While walking back and forth from the storage room, he caught eye of a familiar figure in the aisle where they kept their hoses and metal brackets.  Daryl blanched at the sight of him, but against his better judgment chose to go over and greet his brother.

 

“Whatcha’  doin’ here, Merle?” he asked.

 

“Ho ho, there baby brother!  What you doin’ in the hardware store?” he asked, fumbling with his armload of supplies of various sized hoses, gas cans, electrical tape, and kitty litter?

 

“I work here, now answer m’ question…”

 

Merle looked down at his arms and back at Daryl, “You don’t ask, I won’t tell…”

 

“Merle, goddamn it,” he swore under his breath.  “Don’t fuck this up for me,” he begged, hoping Merle would behave and not cause a scene.

 

“Ain’t doin’ a thing like that, Darylina!  Hey, did you hear the good news?  Dad’s gettin’ released tomorrow!”

 

“Released?” Daryl asked, his heart beating in his chest.  He didn’t even know that Will had been picked up.

 

“Yep, got hauled in a coupla towns over.  Got that lawyer, Blake or whatever the fuck his name is, he got him off.  Damn miracle worker, that man.  He’ll be released tomorrow,”  Merle smiled wide, as if having the abusive alcoholic junkie patriarch of the family back home was the greatest thing. “So what’s the deal with you, and this place, ‘uh?  Did them uppity Grimes folks put you up to this, make you ‘earn your keep’ or some shit?”

 

“No, Merle.  ’m doin’ it for myself.  Need a job to pay for things like a truck, insurance, registration-”

 

“You lost me after truck.  You sure you wanna be seen hangin’ round them cop folk?  Surely you can find some more interestin’ people to spend yer time with.”

 

“Not interested, Merle.  Want out of this shit hole town some day.  Nose to the grindstone, tryin’ to get myself established is all.”

 

“Well, goody for you then.  I’m doin’ the same.”

 

“By building a meth lab?  Seriously, Merle?”

 

“Shut your piehole, brother!”

 

“Ain’t stupid, Merle.  For god’s sake, you’re doing this for him, aren’t ya?  Dad is gon’ be the death of you, ya know that?”  

 

Merle took a step back, frowning at Daryl.  “You got yer life, I got mine.  Don’t be a stranger.  I’m out, got shit ta do.”

 

Daryl shook his head, and walked away.  He was furious with Merle, his father, and now Samuel for not keeping him apprised of the situation with his father.  Samuel and Rick had both promised him better, that Will wouldn’t be able to hurt him, that Daryl was free now.  And here he heard from his own brother that Will was not only arrested, but apparently due to be released.  For the rest of the day, Daryl kept to himself.  He did his work, clocked out at the end of his shift and sat outside awaiting Evelyn to pick him up and bring him back to the house.  

 

“Hi sweetie!” she called from the car as it pulled up to the curb.  He had been lost in thought and hadn’t seen her come around the corner.   He put out his cigarette, flicked the butt into the receptacle, and joined Evelyn in the car.

 

“Did you have a good day today, sweetheart?” she asked, as they pulled away.  

 

“S’alright, I guess.  Saw Merle,” he mumbled, staring out the window as they made their way out of town.

 

“And how is he doin’ these days?”

 

“He’s good.  Gettin’ himself into trouble no doubt.”

 

“What makes ya say that?”

 

“Oh, just… Merle bein’ Merle is all.  He attracts trouble.”

 

“Hm, guess they all can’t be good boys like you and my Richard,” she smiled over at him.

 

“Did you at least have a nice chat with him before he went on his way?”

 

“Hmm, it was informative.”

 

“Oh?” she questioned, turning the car into the parking lot of the local Piggly Wiggly.

 

“He said… He said Dad was getting released tomorrow, but… I ain’t even heard from Mr. Grimes ‘hat he was ever even arrested?  I thought he was out there this whole time.”

 

“He what?  Are you certain?  Because that is not like my Samuel at all.  He would have been sure to relay the news back to you if William had been picked up. This is unacceptable.  We will get to the bottom of this right now, I swear it.”  She backed out of the parking spot that she had pulled into, and with firmer pressure than was necessary, stepped on the gas and hightailed it back out on the road and in the direction of the Sheriff’s Department.

 

“Mrs. Grimes, where we goin’?” asked Daryl, clutching the handle of the door as she took a corner particularly hard.

 

“Please, call me Evelyn, honey.  And Samuel has some explainin’ ta do!  We’ll get him or one of his Deputies to tell us just what in the sam hell is goin’ on.”

 

“It’s okay, Mrs. Grimes.  We can… we can wait until he gets home from his shift,” Daryl insisted.

 

“I am just furious, Daryl.  Furious!  Oh, not at you, honey!  I can only imagine how much it has bothered you having to live with that vile man lurking around every corner, and them not havin’ the decency to keep ya updated?  Furious, I tell ya!”  She pulled into the parking lot of the sheriff’s department and into the first available spot, screeching to a halt.  “Come along, sugar!  They are gon’ explain this to our faces!”  

 

She gripped Daryl by the arm and dragged him along, pushing him through the door ahead of her.  She was positively fuming by the time she made it to the front desk.  “Mrs. Grimes!” greeted Tracy, the desk sergeant.  “What brings you in today? Has this Dixon boy been harassin’ you?” she asked, upon seeing her gripping Daryl rather tightly by the arm.

 

“This?  This is Daryl Dixon.  And I’ll have you know he’s a good man, and an honorable citizen.  So mind yer manners, Tracy and don’t be disrespectin’ him!  Is Samuel in?  He’s here isn’t he.  Well he owes Daryl a bit of an explanation, so we’ll be movin’ along then,” and Evelyn pushed Daryl through the doorway, past the rows of desks, the evidence room, a line of interrogation rooms to an office labeled “Sheriff Grimes.”  She opened the door without knocking, dragged Daryl over to a chair and sat him down in it, and proceeded to cross her arms over her chest and stare daggers at Samuel who was staring wide eyed at the two of them with a phone on his ear.

 

“Mr. Jones?  Would you mind terribly, sir, if I were to call you back? I have an urgent matter that needs tendin’ to… Yes,sir… Thank you, bye-bye.”  And Samuel hung up.

 

“Samuel Ray Grimes, of all the times to let things slide, this is most certainly not the right time!  Did you or did you not know that William Dixon was arrested, arraigned, and set for release for tomorrow?  Because those are details that should have been shared with Daryl!  And now thanks to your careless actions, he has spent the entire day at his place of employment in a deep state of worry and probably feeling quite betrayed by us!”

 

Samuel slowly stood up with his hands up in an ‘I surrender’ gesture, waiting to get a word in from Evelyn’s tirade.  When she paused to take a breath, he jumped in, “You are absolutely right, Evelyn.  Daryl should have been updated as soon as I knew what was going on, and unfortunately, I only just found out now.  Mr. Jones?  He’s the prosecutor that had the good sense to give me a personal phone call to update me on the situation.  Seems Mr. Dixon was picked up by a new deputy who didn’t follow protocol, which is why we were delayed in receiving this news.” 

 

Evelyn’s mask of fury did not abate at Samuel’s explanation, so Sam turned to Daryl.  “I am very sorry that this happened.  I was not hiding this information, that’s not something I would do to you, son.  I can get right on the judge to get a protective order for you, but just be advised… I don’t think Will is the type to respect…”

 

“No sir, he’s not.”

 

Samuel sighed, and pinched the bridge of his nose, “I was afraid of that.”

 

“So just how are we handling this, Samuel?” asked Evelyn.

 

“Alright, word to the wise, Daryl.  Evie has a pistol permit, she’s authorized for concealed carry of a firearm.  She has a pistol on her person at all times, and a revolver in her purse.  And she knows how to use them… very well.  You do NOT want to piss off my wife, ever.  Do you understand me?”

 

“Is that statement directed at me, sir, or-”

 

“It’s a blanket statement, Daryl, but no... it was meant more in the direction of your sperm donor.”

 

Daryl nodded, and looked back and forth between Evelyn and Samuel.  “And you two don’t think I’m capable of taking care of myself?”

 

“That’s not it at all, darlin’.  We’ve seen how… stressed you’ve been since Richard left.  It’s been weighing on us too, hon’.  Samuel is just sayin’ that as long as yer home with us, there is very little that you need to worry yourself about.”

 

“Hmm,” Daryl hummed, and nodded in understanding.  But the thing they didn’t understand was that even with Evelyn packing heat, this didn’t help make Daryl feel any more secure.  In fact, it made the entire situation worse.  This was now putting Evelyn and Samuel at additional risk.  Will was no fool.  He would stop at nothing to get to Daryl if he so chose.  And if he had any idea how much the Grimes Family meant to him, well… that just gave the man more opportunities to hurt him and his family.  As far as Daryl was concerned, he had but one choice.  To get out, and as soon as possible.

 

 

* * *

 

 

_9:23 p.m._

_Rick:  D, I talked to Dad earlier while you were in the shower.  Call me._

 

_10:07 p.m._

_Rick:  Please call me._

 

_10:19 p.m._

_Rick:  Daryl I’m really starting to get worried.  Please…_

 

_10:53 p.m._

_Rick:  Please don’t make me call my parents and have them check to see if you’re still breathing._

 

_10:55 p.m._

_Daryl:  Stop staring at yer phone, I’m fine.  Some of us sleep._

_Rick:  Did I wake you up?_

_Daryl:  Congratulations, yer a genius._

_Rick:  I’m sorry, you can go back to sleep.  I’ll call you in the morning?_

_Daryl: I’m working._

_Rick:  Before work? What time?  Just give me a time, and I’ll call._

_Daryl:  6:45._

_Rick:  Ok, I’ll call then.  Goodnight, ILY._

_Daryl: Night._

 

_6:45 a.m._

_…_

 

_7:00_

_…_

 

_7:20_

_Daryl:  Shift starts in 10 minutes, looks like you were too busy. Again._

 

 

 

* * *

 

_10:33 a.m._

_Rick:  I cannot apologize enough.  We got pulled into a surprise PT test.  I’m so sorry, I feel like all I ever do is apologize._

_Daryl:  Sounds about right_

_Rick:  I’m gonna make it up to you sometime, I swear it_

_Daryl:  If you say so…_

_Rick:  I mean it_

_Rick: Ain’t going to be like this forever_

_Rick:  You believe me?_

_Daryl:  I want to._

_Rick:  I’ll try calling tonight.  I miss your voice._

_Daryl: I miss you.  And I fucking hate that._

_Rick:  Means you care. Right?_

_Daryl:  Yeah_

_Daryl:  Break’s over, gotta run_

_Rick: ILY_

 

Dary’s break wasn’t over, it had only just begun, but he didn’t want to go back into work with the weight of all the emotion dragging him down.  He stood out on the loading dock behind Dale’s store, under the awning so he was in the shade and out of the heat of the sun.  He pulled a cigarette from his pocket and lit it, hoping the nicotine would help to calm his nerves.  He inhaled deeply, held it for a moment, and exhaled it slowly, sending the smoke away from him with the wind.  As he stood there rubbing his hands over his eyes, he heard an all too familiar shuffling of footsteps.  And those steps belonged to none other than Will Dixon himself.

 

“Well, lookie here… if it ain’t that no good son of mine…”

 

“Y’ain’t s’posed to be here, there’s a restrainin’ order-”

 

“You think I’m gonna let some piece of paper keep me from m’own flesh and blood?  You think a piece of paper is gon’ stop me from doin’ to you and that cop family what y’all don’ deserve?  You got another thing coming, asshole.  Ain’t no piece o’ shit child from a no good whorin’ mother gon’ tell me what to do or how to live my life.  Where I can and can’t go.  Bet you must kneeled on down and sucked the cock o’ that there Sheriff to get the protective order goin’?  Guess what you little fucker, it don’t cover public areas.  I can walk down any old street I want to, just says I cain’t go where you live.  Well, I know where you live.  I know that cop, I know his wife, I even know’d his son.  You think they gon’ keep you away from me?  Mm-mm, ain’t nothin’ gon’ stop me.”

 

“Jus’... get the hell outta here,” Daryl growled, struggling to keep his composure.

 

“You got a lot o’ nerve talkin’ to me like that.  Soon as I get back to the house, I’mma take all yer shit you left behind and I’m gon’ burn it.  Good riddance.  Glad yer useless ass is gone, sick o’ the look o’ ya.  All ya ever did was cause trouble, couldn’t be bothered to earn yer own keep like yer brother.  Musta gotten that laziness from yer momma-”

 

“You leave her outta this,” Daryl glowered, his chest heaving, his hands fisted at his side, the nails cutting into the flesh of his palms.

 

“She weren’t good fer nothin’.  Dumb bitch burnt my house down.  Gave me a useless son.  Waste of breath, you are.  Ain’t got no sack.  Bet y’ouse turned out to be one of them faggoty little bitches too.  You a fudgepacker?  Bet you are, ain’t never seen you with no woman.”

 

“Is there a point to this, old man?” Daryl did his best to keep his voice firm and steady, to hold his own.

 

“You shut yer mouth, boy!  You tried to run me off.  Well, fuck you.  I’mma see to it that you get what’s comin’ to ya.  Ten fold.  You and everyone you hold dear.”

 

“Daryl?” came Dale’s voice from inside, “Come see me when your break is over, need to inventory the holiday supplies next!”

 

“Be there in a minute,” Daryl hollered back, not taking his eyes off of his old man.

 

Will raised a finger and pointed his finger at Daryl, spittle flying from his lips as he spoke.  “I’ll be watching you. Piece a paper don’t mean a damn thing, you hear me?”  And he turned and walked away.  Daryl fell back against the wall of the building, and slid down until he was sitting on the ground.  He took a few deep breaths, hoping to calm the trembling of his hands.  He hated how weak he felt, how his old man made him feel.  But he knew the man’s threat were real.  He wasn’t safe.  Nobody was safe.  

 

 

 

* * *

 

 

“Daryl, honey?”  Evelyn leaned toward the boy at the dinner table.  She held a plate of grilled chicken breast out to him to serve himself.  “You seem awful distracted.  Is everything alright, dear?”

 

“Hm? Oh, uh… yes’m, everythin’ is fine.”

 

“Dale isn’t workin’ you too hard now is he, son?” asked Samuel with a look of concern.

 

“No, sir,” Daryl insisted.

 

Evelyn watched Daryl through the rest of the meal, her concern growing when Daryl declined dessert and excused himself from the table.  Samuel watched Daryl as he left the room, and then turned to Evelyn.

 

“I don’t like how he looked, he’s got dark circles under his eyes.  His hands were shaking…”

 

“And he barely ate his dinner!  He’s a growing boy, he should be eating us out of the house!” 

“Has Rick said anything about him?”

 

“Honey, when was the last time we were able to talk to Richard?  You know how busy he is with the Academy.”

 

“Hmm,” Samuel agreed.  “Something is up.  I don’t like it.”

 

 

 

* * *

 

 

The next day Daryl did his best to act normal.  Or rather, what qualified as normal for him.  He kept his head down, busied himself with his work, while also keeping a watchful eye of his surroundings.  At noon, Dale dismissed Daryl to go on his lunch break, and told him to go down the block to the Post Office and pick up the mail.  Daryl agreed, thankful for a break to go outside.  But that relief was short lived, for when he stepped outside and lit up a cigarette, he eyed a familiar truck parked across the street.  Will Dixon was backed into a parking space, and facing Horvath Hardware.  He had his arm slung out the window, slowly flipping his switchblade open and closed, his eyes never leaving Daryl.

 

Daryl looked around him.  There was a lady walking her dog, a young couple with a baby in a stroller, and an elderly man sitting on a bench waiting for the bus.  Witnesses.  Will wouldn’t make a move with so many witnesses nearby, but that did little to ease Daryl’s anxiety.  He turned and hustled down the street to the Post Office.  By the time he came back with the mail, Will was gone.  Daryl brought the mail into the store and back to Dale’s office.  

 

“Mr. Horvath, can-”

 

“Please, Daryl.  Call me Dale.”

 

“Yes, sir.  Dale… Um, I was wonderin’... that apartment upstairs.  What… what needs finishin’ for me to move in?”

 

“Are you a hurry to move in?  Are the Grimes’ turning you out so soon?”

 

“No, no.  Nothing like that.  I just… don’t want to overstay my welcome.  They’ve done so much for me already.”

 

“Oh, okay.  Well, really it’s just fresh paint and a good cleaning.  I wanted to put down some new linoleum in the kitchen area, and retile the bathroom floor, but-”

 

“I could do that!  I mean, if you’d let me.  I’d like to give it a try.  I’ve stayed in worse places, paint ain’t nothin’.”

 

“Alright, well… I guess… You can move in at your leisure then,” he smiled at Daryl, and reached into the desk drawer and pulled out a key ring.  Pulling off two keys, he handed them over to Daryl.  “Bill the supplies to the hardware store, you can pick the paint colors and tile.  I just ask that you go somewhat neutral.  No flashy colors like neon green or anything.”

 

“No, sir.  Neutral it is.  Thanks, Dale.”

 

At the end of the day, Daryl punched out, grabbed his helmet and keys and headed out to his motorcycle.  He started it up and headed out onto the roadway.  He loved riding the bike, it always helped to clear his mind, the wind taking his worries away with it.  About half way back to the Grimes’, he noticed a familiar truck in the rearview mirror barreling toward him.  Looking back over his shoulder, he recognized it as Will’s truck picking up speed toward him.  The bastard was looking to hit him, or run him off the road!  Daryl sped up in an attempt to get away, following the now familiar dips and curves with the road as tightly as he could.  Will’s tires skidded around those bends in the road in an effort to keep up.  Daryl knew there were a series of dirt roads coming up, and his best bet at losing Will was to make a turn onto one of them.  His tires would hold up well against dirt and stone, but Will’s bald slicks would spell trouble for him.  He gained enough headway that he was able to safely turn down one of those roads, but Will was soon behind him again, nearly sliding off the road and into the culvert while trying to follow.  Daryl knew these dirt roads better than Will, and after making several turns, he managed to lose Will.  He pulled his bike off the road and into the woods, hiding it behind a pile of stone and overgrown brush.  His heart hammered in his chest.  He couldn’t stop thinking about Rick. About Samuel, or Evelyn.  What if Will went after Evelyn?  Sure, she was a great shot, or so Samuel said, but when it’s kind of hard to take aim at someone when they’re trying to run you off the road.  What if Will went to Atlanta?  And attacked him while he walked back to his dorm room late at night.  What if Will sat atop a tall building with his rifle, and waited for Samuel to go to one one day?  Because that was just the type of crazy shit that Will would do.  And there wasn’t a goddamn thing that Samuel or Rick could do about it.  There was no way of stopping Will, no way to protect Daryl.  _Not unless… No,_ Daryl thought to himself.  _No, I can’t do that… can I?  No, that’s taking it too far…_

 

When darkness began to fall, Daryl decided it was safe enough to make his way back to the Grimes’ home.  When he arrived, Evelyn had just set dinner on the table.

 

“Just you and me tonight, sweetie.  Samuel is running a double tonight.  I made stew, I hope you don’t mind.  I feel like I’m comin’ down with a bit of a cold.  Soup always makes me feel a bit better.”

 

Daryl nodded, and took his seat.  The thought that Samuel was still at work, and Will was out there had Daryl's anxiety at peak levels.  He did his best to eat his bowl of stew, and then excused himself to go shower.  Evelyn bid him goodnight, claiming she was going to take some cold medicine and get some rest.  That left Daryl ‘alone’ and awake until Samuel arrived home.  He turned off any unnecessary lights, and held vigil in the window of Rick’s bedroom, keeping an eye out for Will’s truck.  Thinking he saw it pass on a neighboring street, Daryl’s heart leapt into his chest.  Panting against the window, he watched as the truck made it’s slow drive down the lane, around the cul-de-sac, and back out onto the main roadway.  It skipped over the Grimes’ road.  It may not have been him, he thought to himself.  He’s not the only truck in town.  But what if it was?

 

_Rick:  Dar, you home?_

_Daryl:  Yep_

_Rick:  How’s everyone?_

_Daryl:  Fine_

_Rick:  Good.  Work going okay?_

_Daryl:  Yep_

_Rick:  Ok…_

_Rick:  Am I disturbing you or something?_

_Rick:  Daryl?_

_Daryl:  Sorry, was watching a movie_

_Rick:  Ok.  I miss you.  I wish I were there with you._

_Daryl:  Me too_

_Rick:  I’ll be home in a couple weeks for a long weekend.  I can’t wait._

 

Daryl smiled at his phone, but it quickly faded.  He wanted to tell Rick not to come home.  That it wasn’t safe.  Not for Rick, and not for him either.  What if he had just gone back home, he wondered.  What if he had just done what Will demanded of him.  What if he hadn’t listened to the Grimes’, went back to that trailer in the woods, and lived the Dixon life that he was meant to. Then maybe none of this would be happening. He never should have listened to the Grimes’.  Thanks to them, his life was in more danger now than ever before. 

 

_Daryl:  Me either.  Goin to bed soon, g’night._

_Rick:  Good night.  Call me soon, I need to hear your voice._

_Daryl:  Tomorrow, gotta headache_

_Rick: Okay, love you._

 

Daryl paused a moment, but couldn’t help himself.  Despite it all, he still had intense feelings for Rick.

 

_Daryl:  LY2_

 

He knew he’d live to regret it, but it would make Rick’s night to see those words on his screen.  He was probably staring at his phone, the damn fool.  Daryl turned his attention back onto the empty street.  He sat up and watched as the lights went out in the homes around him, as people went to bed for the night.  Samuel arrived home around midnight, made his rounds to ensure the house was secure, just as he did every night, and then he went to bed.  Daryl stayed up awhile longer.  His eyelids heavy with need to sleep, but the wheels in his mind couldn’t stop turning.  He pulled out a piece of paper from one of Rick’s notebooks, grabbed a pen, and sat down at the desk.

 

_Mr. and Mrs. Grimes,_

 

_Thank you for your hospitality these past few months.  Have decided to move into Dale’s apartment ahead of schedule.  It’s ready for me, and I’m sure you’re ready to have me out of your hair.  You showed me a kindness I never experienced before in my life.  I’m not one for long drawn out sappy goodbyes.  Know that you will be missed, and I appreciate all that you have done for me.  It’s time that I move on._

 

_Thank you,_

 

_Daryl_

 

He wiped at the tears that had spilled down his cheeks.  He had found stability in this home, and with these people.  For the short time that he had with them, it meant everything.  Even though the risks were now heightened for him, he doubted he would have changed a thing.  In the morning, he would leave before Rick’s parent’s woke up, and he’d leave out the note for them on the table.  He thought about Will, and the danger that he represented.  The crossbow was still in Daryl’s possession, but that was not one that he could tote around town over his arm for protection.  No, he’d need something smaller.  Something he could hide under his shirt.  He would need a gun.  Evelyn.  She was coming down with a cold that meant she probably wasn’t going to be going out of the house for the next few days.  That meant… if he did things right, he could take her gun and she’d never notice.  He still had their house key, he could sneak the gun back.  He didn’t have a choice, he lacked the funds to get a gun of his own.  _And it wasn’t stealing if he was going to return it, right?_

 

* * *

 

Daryl arrived at work before the store opened.  With his backpack and crossbow slung over his shoulder, and Evelyn’s Ruger .380 tucked into the back of his waistband, Daryl climbed the steps to his ‘new’ apartment.  Steel construction door, lock and deadbolt, it was secure.  Dale had replaced all the windows, which also had locks, there were few ways to gain entry to the place.  That came as a relief.  He found some cleaning supplies in the cabinet under the the kitchen sink and set to work.  An alarm dinged on his phone letting him know it was almost time for his shift to start downstairs, so he cleaned himself up, and put away his bag and crossbow in the closet.  The bedroom had a bureau and bed, Dale was kind enough to leave a change of sheets, a blanket and an old quilt.  There was a couch, chair and coffee table in the living area, and the kitchen had a small table and four chairs. It was more than he needed but he was thankful to have it, and Dale allowed him to lock his bike in the back storage building as long as stock was low enough for there to be room to park it.

 

Daryl began his work day as normal, running various errands for Dale, reorganizing the shelves, and mixing paint for customers.  Early afternoon he felt his phone buzz in his pocket.

 

_Merle: yo brother, you workin_

_Daryl: yeah why_

_Merle: need a couple hose clamps_

_Daryl: yeah so come get them_

_Merle: truck is dead and dad ain't home_

_Daryl: ain't a delivery service for fuckin hose lamps_

_Merle: come on you little fucker do your bro a favor_

_Daryl: can't_

_Merle: why the fuck not_

_Daryl: ain't going home. Not welcome there. Dad tried to run me off the road the other day._

_Merle: bullshit. was probably just messing with ya_

_Daryl: he's pissed at me_

_Merle: don't sound like something he would do_

_Daryl: you wouldn't know, yer high half the time_

_Merle: you should try this meth we're making, got the recipe just right I think_

_Daryl: dude I don't do drugs_

_Merle: your loss bring me them clamps_

_Daryl: no_

_Merle: asshole_

 

Daryl shook his head, exasperated with his brother who could be such a fucking tool sometimes.  But as the day came to an end, he couldn't stop thinking about the stupid hose clamps. And that trailer. And the few treasured things that he hoped might still be there.  The picture of him and his mom, back when she was sober and they both were smiling. The quiver of bolts that he and Merle had made together when he first got his crossbow, he saved a few. And the leather vest with the angel wings.  Those were the only things that mattered to him. If his dad was out, maybe he could kill two birds with one stone, so to speak. Get Merle his fucking clamps, and he could get his things, and be done there. Forever.

 

_Daryl: Dad still gone?_

_Merle: yep_

_Daryl: ok, be there in 20 with yer damn clamps_

_Merle:  heading out with joe in 10 leave the clamps on the counter_

_Daryl: got it_

 

This was even better.  Without Merle there dilly-dallying, he would be in and out quick.

 

* * *

 

_Evelyn: Samuel, my Ruger is missing. Did you take it out for cleaning?_

_Samuel: No_

_Evelyn: I don't want to worry you but Daryl left a note. He's moved out._

_Samuel: What? I thought the apartment wasn't ready yet._

_Evelyn: I don't know honey…_

_Samuel: This don't feel right._

 

 

_Evelyn: Daryl, please call me_

_Samuel: D, I need a phone call asap_

_Rick: Daryl, Please call asap. Me or my parents, I don't care who. Call. We're worried…_

 

_Rick: Merle, my name is Rick. I'm a friend of Daryl’s. I can't get through to him. Is he with you by chance?_

_Merle: you the copper’s kid?_

_Rick: yes, but that's irrelevant. Is Daryl ok?_

_Merle: Ain't seen him, but he's stopping by the house to drop off some stuff_

_Rick: Are you aware there's a restraining order against your dad?_

_Merle: no_

_Merle: for real?_

_Merle: guess the kid weren't joking when he said dad was trying to run him off the road then_

_Rick: when?_

_Merle: the other night_

_Rick: shit, Daryl's in danger_

 

_Rick:  Dad, he’s gone home.  Will tried to run him off the road the other day.  HELP HIM. PLEASE.  I’m on my way home now!_

_Samuel:  10-4, mobilizing now._

 

* * *

 

Daryl slowed the motorcycle to a crawl as he pulled down the road to the old run down trailer.  Will’s truck was in the driveway, much to his disappointment.  He ran his hand behind him to make sure the gun was still in his waistband, it was.  He edged up to the front steps with Merle’s hose clamps in hand.  Peeking in the dirty window, he could make out his father’s figure in the worn out recliner.  He wasn’t moving, or yelling at the TV, so he was either asleep or high.  It was now or never…

 

Daryl slowly unlatched the door, and opened it just enough to squeeze in before the hinges squeaked.  With silent steps, he walked behind the chair, down the short hallway to his room.  It had been trashed.  Will had taken a knife to the mattress and destroyed it.  The drawers of his bureau were pulled out and thrown around the room.  The closet ransacked.  Daryl knelt down within the closet and pulled back the loose trim board, there lay a small box which contained the picture of him and his mother, and the quiver of arrows pushed up inside the wall.  He dug around and found the leather vest stuffed under the frame of his bed.  He put that on, slung the quiver over his shoulder, and stuffed the box in his pocket.  As he stood to leave, he heard those familiar shuffling footsteps, and he froze.  He prayed as hard as he ever prayed before that the man would walk past his room to the bathroom.  But he had made the mistake of leaving his bedroom door open.  The old man would see him, there was no place to hide with the closet door torn from it’s hinges.

 

“You got some nerve you fuckin’ piece of shit…”  Will advanced on him, eyes wide and glazed over, fists swinging.  Daryl swerved and jumped out of the way, scrambling over the detritus of his room making for the doorway.  Will hauled himself up and after him, grabbing hold of Daryl’s pant leg and yanking his legs out from under him.  When he went down, his head hit the corner of the bedside table, blood gushed from the wound down into his eye, temporarily blinding him.  He kicked his feet as hard as he could and got himself out into the hallway, but as he moved to run, Will grabbed a handful of hair on the back of his head, and shoved him hard into the wall.  Daryl threw his arms back, hands grabbing for anything.  He got ahold of Will’s ear and pulled as hard as he could.  The man screamed and let go.  Daryl ran for the door, but it was locked, the deadbolt stuck.  He turned it as hard as he could yanking on the door to open it, but it was stuck hard.  Will came at him with his switchblade opened and ready, he advanced on Daryl once more.  Daryl grabbed a cast iron skillet from the oven and threw it at Will.  It caught him in the shoulder but barely slowed the man down.  So Daryl hopped up on the counter, grabbing mugs and plates from the cabinets throwing them all at the man, watching them shatter on the floor.  Broken shards cutting into the man’s legs and feet, yet not slowing him down.  Daryl leaped onto the table, and with nowhere else to go, he threw himself through the picture window landing heavily on the deck beyond, glass shards flying everywhere.  He heard the sirens in the distance, the police were on their way, he hoped.

 

Will was hollering from inside the house, trying to get out the door and later going for the window.  Daryl picked himself up and ran for the woods, he hid behind a tree, wiped the blood from his eyes and looked back to make sure Will wasn’t coming.  The fool had one bloody leg swung out the shattered window and was making the climb out, with a rifle in hand.  Three cruisers from the King County Sheriff Department pulled into the driveway across the lawn and came to a sliding dusty halt.

 

Samuel hopped out, gun drawn.  “Will Dixon, put the gun down, lay down on the ground, and put your hands behind your head.”

 

“Fuck you!” Will swung his other leg over and stood barefoot on the smashed glass, bleeding from his arms and legs, swinging the gun around wildly as several deputies emerged from their vehicles, guns drawn.  Daryl gasped and shook from behind the tree as he watched Will raise the rifle and take aim at Samuel.  

 

“Put the gun down, Will!”

 

“Y’all ain’t got nothin’ on me!”

 

“You’re under arrest for attempted murder, violation of a protective order, and for being under the influence of whatever illegal drug we’re going to find inside that home.  Now where’s Daryl?”

 

Will laughed, “That little fucker was here stealin’ from me.”

 

“This was his home, Will!”

 

“Ain’t ever been his home, his home was the one his momma burnt to the ground with herself in it.  She shoulda taken him with ‘er.”

 

“Where is Daryl?”

 

“Ain’t here, not get the fuck off my lawn!”

 

Samuel scanned the yard, the windows, the treeline, “Last chance, Will.  Where is Daryl?”

 

Daryl watched in horror as Will raised the rifle, and took aim at Samuel.

 

“Last time I tell you to get the fuck off my property!”  Daryl pulled the Ruger from his waistband, and in a flurry of gunshots, William Dixon took his last breath and fell dead to the ground.  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alrighty peeps, this ends my reign of terror on this story, for now. Eleni will be providing chapter 9, and then Chapter 10 will be a joint effort. I hope you all have enjoyed these last few chapters that I wrote for you. Let us know your thoughts, it's our biggest motivator!


	9. Turbulent Psyche

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The aftermath of the shootout on the Dixon property.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *whispers into the void* Helloooooo? Is anyone still there?
> 
> It's been a few weeks, but we're still plugging away at this story. Eleni started this chapter, and was then plagued by headaches, so I finished it off. The next two chapters will follow suit, with us co-writing the chapters together. This part of the series will end with 11 chapters, we'll take a short break, and then dive into Part 2. We hope you are all still enjoying the story!
> 
> And that premiere? HOLY SHIT! Season 7... I knew what was coming, but I was not prepared. Not by a long shot. It's 4 days later and I'm still processing...

He didn’t stop. His sides hurt so bad that he couldn’t breathe, but he kept pushing as hard as he could. Jumping over broken tree limbs and roots. He was determined to get as far away from his father’s house as well as the Grimes. He pounded his feet into the ground, tree branches struck his face making him growl in pain. He just ran. All his life, that’s all he ever done was run. Ran from his father, ran from his brother. Ran from the police for doing his family’s dirty job. And now, he was running from murdering his father, running from the only man who stepped up to be that fatherly figure. Stealing from the woman who loved him and treated him like her own kin. Running from the cops and he was now embracing the last name he dreaded on taking.

 

Daryl pocketed the Ruger and beelined through the woods. Sure, he knew where it lead but Samuel and the police didn’t. All he heard was the faint hollering of Samuel’s voice screaming for him. Internally, he was scared... He was freaking out. How could he live a life as a Dixon and be known for killing his father?

 

Slowing down he leaned against a tree to catch his breath. He closed his eyes wishing that none of this happened. That he wasn’t born a Dixon, he wished that none of his past happened. He squeezed them even tighter hoping that the more he wished that his whole past would go away. That he was born a different person. Of course, still wishing that Rick was running with him. Not a care in the world. That they weren’t running through the woods to get away from the police. That they were just two teenage kids enjoying nature. That when they’d run out of breath that they’d fall on the grassy wood ground and hold one another. Kiss one another. And just look at one another. He missed Rick, Rick was simply his person and looked passed the last name and treated him like a real person, along with Rick’s family.  When he opened his eyes and let them re-adjust, he looked around and saw nothing but trees until he looked towards his left. Sighing, he pushed himself off the tree and slowly walked to the cabin.

 

“Daryl!” Samuel hollered but it kept becoming faint to Daryl as he moved further through the trees.

 

With nothing but pain in his sides he slowly climbed the front steps to the un-lit porch. He gasped for air as he knocked on the door.

 

“Hello!” he yelled as he began to bang on the door.

 

With no answer from within, he walked around the porch looking in the windows.  He saw nothing, but realized that one of the windows was barely lifted up. He pushed the old wooden window up enough just to crawl in through and made it to the kitchen. He grabbed him a cup of water from faucet and chugged it all gone until he found something that caught his eye. He saw the half bottle of Jim Bean sitting idly on the shelf and he faintly smiled, knowing exactly what he was getting himself into... He was a Dixon after-all, why not live up to the name and the reputation behind it. He twisted the lid off of the bottle and sighed as he took a gulp of the amber liquid. 

  
  


He groaned as the the liquid burned all the way down his chest and into his belly. He groaned and shook his head at the potent drink and chugged more of it. He winced as he took another gulp of water to wash it down. Walking into the living room he scoffed at the raggedy brown chair that sat in the middle of the floor facing the television with antennas pointed in two different directions.  He rolled his eyes, his mother had a television with the antennas before the house caught fire and burned to the ground with her still inside it.

 

He gulped down even more as it warmed him all the way from head to toe. He was more than tipsy as he swung the front door open with one hand as the other was occupied with the bottle of Jim Beam. He wobbly pounded his feet in the ground under the towering trees and pulled the Ruger out of the waistband of his jeans with his right hand. He no longer heard the wailing of Samuel, no longer heard the phone going off as he ditched it. He no longer felt the fear of his indignant father. And he no longer felt compelled to explain himself to anyone about his life and what he’d gone through... Even to Rick... If he ever saw his boyfriend again…  He had a glimpse of what life could be, and it was altogether too shortlived.  He should have known it wouldn’t last. What a waste this time with the Grimes had been. 

 

He laughed at himself for not only the hellacious life he’d been living with William Dixon. Living life as a Dixon. Living life of the son of the mother who was a drug addict and alcoholic that was too miserable that she offed herself. Living the life second to Merle Dixon. The King of Meth-lab city in King County. He laughed until tears were falling down his face and his stomach was hurting. He closed his eyes continuing to laugh bitterly and ran into a tree, but as he regained his balance he gulped even more and began to walk more to the opening tree line of the woods that lead right into the cemetery. 

  
  


* * *

  
  
  


He stumbled in the back entry of the cemetery, passing the old willow tree and walked to the only grave without a headstone. He plopped down with the Ruger in his left hand and the bottle in his right but as soon as he managed to get comfortable, he sat the three fourths’ empty bottle in-between his legs and pulled out the only picture of him and his mother. He was only a few years old and she was holding him while they both laughed. He remembered that day. It was the day his daddy came home after losing his job and took it out on her. He sighed to himself and sat the picture on his leg as he took another swig at the bottle and felt wetness falling down his cheeks. He held his chest in pain as he lost himself right then and there. His heart a flurry of whirling emotions.  Love and betrayal, pain and heartache.  He’d been allowed to feel nearly complete with the love of Rick and his family.  But that had now been torn all away thanks to his father.  He’d felt the love of his mother, but she had been too weak in this life, incapable of being the protective mother he had so desperately needed.  And he had often wondered if that fire that had taken her life, had been of her own doing, of her own choice and free will.

 

“You stupid bitch!,” he screamed at the lumps and rocks that lay there to mark her grave, “How could you! How could you leave me in this world with that monster and my brother! The men who made my life a living hell,” he screamed even more as tears fell like a downpour. 

 

He sat there as he took the almost empty pack of cigarettes out and his zippo lighter and lit a cigarette and inhaled the very beginning of the nicotine as he lit the picture of him and his mother. He was drunk, very drunk, and full heartbreak and hatred, but then he saw Rick’s face when he closed his eyes.

 

* * *

 

 

_ Rick:  Please text me ASAP.  It’s an emergency. _

_ Glenn:  Shit dude, whats going on? _

_ Rick:  Daryl is missing and in danger _

_ Glenn: Ok, so what do you want me to do? _

_ Rick:  I’m on my way back to town now, Dad says he went home, old man tried to kill him and he took off _

_ Glenn:  omg _

_ Rick: How do you feel about walking around the woods near his house? _

_ Glenn:  Is his dad gonna shoot me? _

_ Rick:  His dad is dead, shoot out with the cops _

_ Glenn:  Fuck, man… _

_ Rick:  Can you help? Please?  I wouldn’t ask if it weren’t important _

_ Glenn:  I got it, used to live in his old neighborhood.  Our mom's used to be friends.  I got a couple ideas where he might be.  Tell your Dad to head to the cemetery.   _

_ Rick: ? _ _  
_ _ Glenn:  His mom is buried there, no grave marker but she’s by the willow tree in the back corner _

_ Rick:  I can’t thank you enough for this _

_ Glenn: Haven’t done anything yet, thank me if I’m able to find him. _

 

_ Rick: Cemetery, by the willow tree. Glenn en route. _

_ Samuel: Thank you, drive safe.  Take your time please _

_ Rick:  Just help him, please _

 

Rick pushed himself back into the seat of Shane’s truck, and pressed the gas pedal a little harder, the speedometer inching past 60, past 70, and hovered near 80.  Rick relayed the conversation in his mind that he had with Shane before he left.  Shane had not wanted to hand over the keys to his truck.  He didn’t think Daryl was worth it.  “He’s just a Dixon, all they are is trouble.  You don’t need that, Rick.”

 

“Shane, he’s my friend.  He’s living at my house, he’s damn near family. Just gimme yer keys, please.  Don’t make me beg.”   
  


“What about yer reputation here? Huh?  You miss out on classes and shit...ain’t gonna look good.”

 

“Ain’t gonna look good if we got bodies to bury, Shane,” Rick had bristled.

 

Shane had shook his head, rubbing his hand over the shortly shorn hair.  “Alright, man.  I still say it’s a waste of time, but… do what ya gotta do.”

 

Rick had grabbed the keys from Shane’s hand and took off at a sprint for the truck.  Traffic in and around Atlanta was heavy, regardless of the time of day or night.  So despite the distance not being that great between King County and Atlanta, having to traverse the numerous street lights and the bogged down highways, getting back to his hometown was going to take time. Precious time that he did not have.

 

* * *

 

Daryl sat on the cold ground, his legs crossed, holding the bottle of Jim Beam to his chest and rocking back and forth.  The gun in his free hand, his finger rubbing over the trigger.  Whether it was a means to self soothe or not, it wasn’t working as the tears fell, and he hiccuped.  He took a long swallow from the bottle, no longer feeling the burn as it washed down his throat, his body numb but his mind… oh, his mind would not stop running.  He was assaulted with moments and memories.  His mother, and how she would run her fingers through his hair while he lay his head in her lap.  The one time Merle took him to the zoo, and they spent the entire day there until closing time.  The few people in school that never judged him, yet he was never able to outright befriend.  Glenn, and Maggie, they’d never treated him different.  Or Bethy, even.  And Rick, those blue eyes that could see through the layers of himself that he hid behind, he never meant to fall in love with him, but it had happened anyway.  And what had come of it?  He had a dead mother six feet under.  A dead father, whose body had only just begun to cool.  Daryl could have been at home in his own bed right now if it hadn’t been for that night at the bowling alley.  Sure, he’d have to deal with his old man, but he’d be alive and Daryl would never have had to raise a gun to him and shoot him dead.  No, Dixons can’t have nice things.  This just proved it to him.  

 

He stared down at Evelyn’s Ruger in his hand, the metal now warm from his hand. Evelyn, sweet Evelyn.  A welcomed respite from the storm that was his life.  She’d surely hate him now for having stolen from her.  Dammit, he lifted his hand and dragged the heel of it across his eyes, brushing away the tears that fell endlessly.  The grip of the gun dragged across his brow, and he pressed it hard into his flesh. Pulling it away, and then slamming it back against his forehead.  Over and over again until the blood blinded his eyes, and the gun slipped in his hands, and then he screamed with all that he had.  Spittle flying from his mouth, his face flushed a fierce red with the effort.  And he rocked on his hands and knees as he sobbed, never taking notice of the change in the night sounds around him.  Never noticing the sound of footsteps on the grass, the subtle crunch of sneakers against the fall leaves.  

 

"Daryl?" Glenn called out, his voice heavy as if the whole world is on his shoulder.  Daryl stumbled back on his heels, falling onto the ground nearly bowled over by the sudden appearance of Glenn.  Glenn?  What was he doing here?  It wasn’t safe!   
  
"Get out'a here!" Daryl screamed as he wiped his tears off his cheek with the gun still pressed to his temple.   
  
"Daryl.. Please, put the gun down..." Glenn pleaded.   
  
"I said go!" Daryl was now screaming at the top of his lungs.   
  
"I can't. I'm already invested. You're just going to have to kill me as well.. or kill me first.."    
  
"Are you stupid!? God, fucking chinaman... You's got'a death wish!?”

 

“Stupid?  Maybe… Death wish?”  Glenn shook his head no. “Not at all…  Rick was worried ‘bout you.  He needed to make sure you were okay.”

 

Daryl chuckled bitterly, struggling to get to his feet, swaying unsteadily as he was now three sheets to the wind.  He took another swallow from the bottle.  “He was worried, huh?  He was worried… well, ain’t no need to worry ‘bout me.  I ain’t nothin’.  I ain’t nobody.  Ain’t no reason for him to ‘worry’ about me,” he added in the air quotes.  He stumbled backwards, the willow tree catching him from behind, and holding him steady.  He never noticed how Glenn had moved to the side, and leaned against a particularly ornate gravestone.  He never saw the glow from Glenn’s phone or the way his thumb moved over the screen in the dim light.

 

_ Glenn:  He’s at the cemetery, he needs an ambulance _

_ Rick: omg, T Y !!!!!!!!!!! _

 

“Don’t you want to know how I knew you would be here?” asked Glenn.

 

Daryl was muttering to himself incoherently at this point, his head back against the bark of the tree at his back, his face dark with the blood that was leaking from his self inflicted wound.  

 

“Don’t care, China man!” he growled.

 

“I lived in your neighborhood, back then,” he gestured to the plot where Daryl’s mom was buried.  “I was with you that day… when the firemen came, and we watched as your house burned not knowing your mom was still inside.”

 

“Ain’t interested in no trips down memory lane, Rhee!”

 

“I sat with you on the stone wall, and we waited for hours for the fire to be put out.”

 

Daryl wavered on his feet, his fist still firm around the neck of the bottle.  He barely managed to get it to his lips, it was a wonder he hadn’t passed out yet.

 

“My mom, she brought some food, blankets, and a change of clothes for you.  And she sat with us until your father stumbled home.  She stood up to him when he started yelling at you, blaming you for that fire.”

 

“What… what yer… point…”  Daryl could no longer stand on his own two feet and tumbled to the ground, holding the bottle up so it wouldn’t spill the rest of him in a graceless heap.

 

Glenn held his position, “Daryl, you weren’t even home when that fire started.  We were at the playground.  It was in no way your fault, but he… he wasn’t right.”

 

“Nah, shoulda… shoulda been watchin’ ‘er.  Shoulda been… at ‘er side.  She.... I’s think she set it herself,”  Daryl winced, leaning back against the tree his eyes threatening to roll back into his head.

 

“That fire wasn’t your fault.  And what happened tonight?  That wasn’t your fault either…”

 

“He… he dead.   Ol’ man… he dead cuz ‘o me.”

 

Glenn shook his head, taking a few steps closer to Daryl, sitting himself down on the grass level with him.  “You got the shit end of the sick, Daryl.  The way they treated you, ain’t right.  Ain’t normal.  You deserved to have a family.  And that’s what you got with the Grimes.”

 

The sound of the police siren drew his eyes away from Glenn.  “Nah… they ain’t… ain’t m’family.”

 

He took another swallow from the bottle, and then let it slip from his hands.  A police car pulled into the entrance to the cemetery, Glenn stood shielding the headlights from his eyes with his hand.  Samuel screeched to a halt nearby and hopped out of the police car running to Daryl.

 

“Daryl!  DARYL!  Oh my… Glenn, what happened?”

 

Daryl was now lying on the ground, his eyes unfocused and barely open.

 

“He smashed that gun against his face, been drinkin’ too,”  Glenn joined Samuel on the ground.

 

“Daryl?”  Samuel pulled the Ruger from Daryl’s hands, and shoved the bloody gun into his waistband.  “Daryl!”  He slapped his cheeks a few times, bringing Daryl around.

 

“Mr. Grime-,” Daryl’s face twisted in anguish, “Mr… I… I so-”

 

“Daryl, I want you to listen to me-”

 

“I’m sorry,” Daryl wailed, new tears dripping down his face.  He had grabbed Samuel’s jacket by the lapels and was holding on for dear life.  “I didn’ mean to, I swear!”

 

“Daryl, you did NOTHING wrong, son.  Nothing!  I promise you!”

 

“I stole.  I stole the gun!  I stole from YOU.  I shot my Dad-”

 

“No,” Samuel shook his head emphatically.  “No, Daryl.  You didn’t!  Trajectory puts the shot coming from law enforcement.  There were no bullets from your direction.  You didn’t do it, son.  HE did it!”

 

“He… he… wha-”  Daryl sent limp in Samuel’s arms, his hands falling from the fabric, his head lolling back and flopping down toward the ground.

 

“Help me get ‘im into the car,” Samuel ordered.  They pulled Daryl up, his arms over each shoulder and got him over to the car, laying him out on the back seat on his side.  “You text Rick, tell ‘im I got Daryl.  I’m taking him to the hospital.  I can’t tell you how much I appreciate you doin’ this, Glenn.  I’m sorry you got involved, but… It means a lot.  I promise either Rick or I will keep you updated.”  Samuel patted Glenn on the shoulder, hopped in the front seat of the cruiser and took off for the nearest hospital.

 

It was only the next town over, but a good fifteen minute drive.  Samuel put on his siren when necessary, the entire time talking to Daryl in the back seat as if he were conscious.

 

“I wish… Dammit, son I wish you had just… just come and talked to me.  Wish you hadn’t gone back home to… to him.  Why?  Why did you do it?  There was no reason to go back there!  You were free of him!”  Samuel took the hard turns as gently as he could so Daryl wouldn’t be thrown from the seat.  He kept checking the rearview mirror to see if Daryl was still breathing.  The blood from his wound smeared against the light brown vinyl of the seat.

 

“I feel like we failed you, somehow.  The system failed you, that’s for damn fuckin’ sure, and I could spit nails-”  His phone vibrated on the dash, the screen lighting up with a text from Rick,  _ I’ll be at the hospital in 30.  Mom will meet you there. _

 

Thank God for that woman, he thought to himself.  She had the gentle touch that Daryl would be needing.  She would know just what words to use on him, how to talk to him, how to reason with him.  The woman was a saint, strong and fierce as they come, and solid as a mighty oak.  Bit emotional as any good mother is, but it’s that special brand of love that no man can duplicate  She was Samuel’s rock, and in Daryl’s time of need, she’d be the same for him.  And he needed it.

 

With lights still flashing he screeched to a halt at the doors of the Emergency Room.  Evelyn was waiting just inside the doors, and Samuel saw her holler to the staff.  A gurney and several nurses came rushing out, and they helped to pull Daryl from the car setting him down as gently as they could and then wheeled him away.  “Go with him!” Samuel called after Evelyn, he had to move his car to make way for any ambulances that arrived.  She waved him off and followed as they pulled Daryl into an exam room.

 

“Ma’am, do you have any idea what happened?” a young nurse asked, appearing at Evelyn’s side.     
  


“No, I’m sorry.  He… I don’t know.”

 

“Is he family?  Your son?”

 

“Family, yes.  But no, he’s not my son.  May I hold his hand, if I’m not in the way?  My husband will be here momentarily and he can tell you more.”

 

“Yes, ma’am.  Stand on that side, we’re going to get him hooked up and take some vitals.  Clean off that blood and see if he is needing stitches.”

 

Evelyn nodded as she moved into position, pulling Daryl’s bloodied hand into her own.  Gripping his limp fingers with one hand, she patted them with the other, ignoring the dried crusting of his blood on his skin.  She stood quietly watching the flurry of activity around them, connecting wires to him to check his heart rate and blood oxygen levels.  Intravenous fluids were started, and they began to remove Daryl’s clothes.  First his shoes, then they pulled out the scissors to cut off his pants and shirt.  Evelyn helped as best she could, throwing the sheet over his lap to protect his dignity.  But even she could not stop herself from gasping at the sight of Daryl’s skin as his clothes were stripped from his body.  He had scars, everywhere that might not be visible in standard attire.  The inside of his arms were covered in circular burns, where the flesh is most sensitive.  Thick scars across his back, and thinner knife cuts on his ribs.  Some were recent, others had faded with the years.

 

Samuel arrived in the doorway talking with the doctor, and took a position at Evelyn’s side.  A nurse came in to draw blood, and Evelyn kissed Daryl’s knuckle as she drew the blood from his arm.  

 

“Sam, what happened?” Evelyn cried, unable to hold back the tears at the unconscious boy before her.

“Simply put, he went home for some reason.  Will is dead, self defense on our part but I’m not sure if Daryl knows that.  He found himself a bottle of booze, and he drank damn near all of it.  They’re fixing to pump his stomach…”

 

“Oh, honey…”  Evelyn kept her hand on Daryl’s, but wrapped her arm around Samuel’s waist, and tucked her face against his chest.

 

“I’ve asked that they keep him for observation, and admit him to psychiatric until he can prove he’s not a risk to himself.  I believe he had a breakdown, but we won’t know unless he wakes up.”

 

A nurse came in with wash cloths, donned her gloves and ran a small pan of warm water.  Evelyn shook her head, “please, may I?” She gestured to the cloths.  “The bleeding has stopped.”  The nurse hesitated, but after eyeing a uniformed Samuel standing resolutely at the bedside, she nodded warily.  “If his vitals change-”  

 

“Yes, miss.  I promise, I will stand back and allow you folks to tend to your duties.”

 

“Alright then,” and she handed over the supplies.

 

Evelyn didn’t bother with the gloves, but pulled the pillow from under Daryl’s head, replacing it with a towel.  She dropped the cloths into the pan of water, and pulled one out, wringing the water from it, and placing it on Daryl’s face.  She did that with several cloths, allowing the water to soften the crusted blood, allowing for it to be wiped away gently.  The abrasions on his forehead began to seep again, a few butterfly bandages was all he appeared to need there.  She dabbed gently as the bruises were already forming beneath the skin.

 

Brushing back the shaggy mop of hair from his forehead, she wiped as much of the blood away as she could.  Running her fingers over his eyebrows, smoothing the hairs and marveling at the gentle look of his face.  Despite the dark circles beneath his eyes, his face was relaxed and did not hold that guarded look he usually displayed.  After making him look more presentable, the nurse came in to cleanse and patch his wounds.  It wasn’t until she was finishing up that Daryl began to stir.  

 

Evelyn pulled her chair closer, taking Daryl’s hand gently between her own.

 

“Daryl, don’t panic, it’s just me, honey.  Daryl?  You’re okay, Samuel and I are here with you.  Go ahead and open those eyes, we’re right here with you darlin’.”  She patted his hand gently as his eyes twitched and rolled beneath his lids.  He groaned low and deep, his arms and legs shifting in their positions.  A gasp, and one hand moved toward his stomach.

 

“Grab me that pail, Samuel,” Evelyn ordered, and Samuel handed her the plastic basin and held it near Daryl.

 

“Come on, honey.  You need to roll on yer side,” Evelyn reached over giving his shoulder a tug as the boy groaned his way to consciousness, his eyes going wide and wild before flinging himself face first into the basin and vomiting violently.  His stomach heaved and rolled, and after a few minutes he spat the last of it into the basin and rolled back onto the bed, sweat dripping from his forehead.  He wiped away the spittle with the back of his hand, and looked around the room suddenly realizing where he was.  All the while, Evelyn calmly fussed over him, dumping the basin and getting a cup of water and a wet wash cloth for him.

 

“What… what are ya doin’,” he groaned, laying on his side looking around the room.  “Why am I here?”

 

Evelyn pulled the chair next to the bed, and tucked the basin beneath it.  “You made some poor choices this evening, Daryl.  And as a result of those choices, and being unkind to yourself, you are now her at the hospital.”

 

“Daryl, you’re alive, but you took a mighty big risk, son.  Tell me why you went back to that house?  Why would you endanger yourself like that?”

 

“Merle… He needed somethin’ and said Dad was out.  Figured it was safe.”

 

“You never should have gone back-   
  


“No shit, I fuckin’ realize that now.  So’s ya gonna arrest me or what?  Where’s the cuffs?  I’ll take out the IV and we can be on our merry way,” Daryl held up his wrists to Samuel who had moved to standing behind Evelyn.

 

“Why would I arrest you?”

 

“Well, sir.  Unless I’m mistaken, my Dad is dead and it’s my fault.”

 

“Your choice to go home this evening may have resulted in his death, but it was certainly not your doing.”

 

Daryl frowned, and Evelyn reached out to him, but he pulled back from her.

 

“Samuel, you need to explain, he doesn’t know…”  She sat back in the chair, her hands folded primly in her lap.

 

“Your father had words with the law enforcement, you saw that, yes?”

 

“Mm-hm,” he nodded.

 

“He raised his gun, several times.  The final time he raised it, we had no choice but to defend ourselves.  You raised Evelyn’s Ruger, aimed, and fired.  But you did not hit him.  Trajectory of the kill shot came from the direction of the cruisers, you did not kill your father.”

 

Daryl took a shuddering breath, and turned his head away.  He had been certain that when his father fell to the ground, it had been his gun that did the man in.  Of course, the details were now fuzzy given the alcohol he had consumed, his overall mental and physical exhaustion.  He closed his eyes as a few tears spilled down his cheeks.

 

“Honey, they’re going to keep you a few days, make sure you’re okay.  That any old… injuries have healed proper.  They wanna help you, son-”

 

“Ain’t yer son,” Daryl seethed, turning to Samuel and Evelyn, his eyes flashing in anger.  “Ain’t yer son, ain’t yer family.  I never asked for this!”

 

“Dar-”

 

“NO!  I never shoulda listened to Rick.  I never shoulda showed up at yer house.  Never woulda had to steal no gun, never woulda got my heart broke, never woulda lost my old man.”

 

“He was not a kind man-”

 

“No fuckin’ shit, lady.  But he died, didn’t he?  If I hadn’ta talked to yer son, none of this ever woulda happened.  Fuck y’all and them high horses ya rode in on!”

 

Daryl’s enraged state drew the attention of the nurses and a doctor in the hall, and one came at him with a syringe tucked in her hand.

 

“Oh, no you don’t!” he screamed.  “You get the hell away from me with that thing!”  He scrambled to untangle himself from the sheets, but Samuel strode around the bed and grabbed him by the arms.

 

“Daryl, I’m sorry-”

 

Daryl looked from him to the nurse and back and screamed, a guttural wail as he threw his head back and fought with all his might.  Swinging his arms uselessly against Samuel, and kicking his legs fiercely in an effort to get away.

 

“DARYL!” came a stern yet worried voice, and for a moment, Daryl slowed his battle and looked toward the doorway.   There stood Rick, his too tight Police Academy t-shirt and Daryl’s favorite pair of jeans.  His curly hair gone awry with the worrying and running his hand through it on the ride back to town.  “Daryl, stop!”  His voice gentler, his hand outstretched, “Just stop.  It’s okay, man…”

Daryl’s struggles slowed, Rick’s voice hypnotic, and as Rick took a step closer to the bed, the nurse plunged the needle into the IV and a sedative hit Daryl’s system.

 

“Rick?” his voice slurred, and Samuel laid him back down on the bed gently.  Evelyn vacated her seat, and gestured for Rick to come sit down.

 

“Rick…” Daryl whispered, his eyelids drooping as he fought the effects of the medicine.

 

“I’m right here, buddy.  I’m right here,”  he sat down in the chair, Samuel and Evelyn moving to the doorway but watching to make sure Daryl didn’t strike out at Rick.

 

“I… I didn’ mean it.  I swear… I didn’.... I…. I’m sorry… I… stupid. Sssooo… stupid,” Rick moved to the edge of the bed and pulled Daryl into his arms, kissing him firm on the lips and then holding him as he slipped into unconsciousness.  The last thing Daryl remembered, was Rick carding his hands through his hair, and kissing his eyelids closed as Samuel and Evelyn looked on.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What's coming in chapters 10 and 11? We'll be introducing Jesus. And Daryl and Rick will get to (finally!) spend some much needed time together.
> 
> Still enjoying the story? Tell us what you think, what you liked! <3


	10. Perpetual Changes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The aftermath, Daryl is hospitalized and Rick returns home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Holy crapadoodle on a cracker! This chapter is over 10,000 words long! WOWZA! This chapter was a complete collaboration, meaning we BOTH contributed to it. Can you figure out which parts were written by who? LOL, no worries if you can't, you won't be quizzed on it. As always, comments and kudos are our bread and butter. It is what motivates us (and any fanfiction writer!), so let us know what you liked!

“Fuck…” Merle stood awkwardly just inside Daryl’s hospital room.  The lights were dimmed within, but the light from the hallway cast him in a long shadow across the floor, and lit the bed that Daryl lay curled up on.  He was lying on his side, facing away from the door.  Both wrists in restraints, an IV running off of one arm, and his blankets tossed haphazardly over his lower half.  His johnnie was open in the back, and Merle could see the scars that littered his back.  Thick and pink, and the thin silvery older scars that had been there for quite some time.  There was no mistaking it, Daryl had received multiple lashings across his backside over the years.  Merle hadn’t known.  How could he have?  A regular junkie, or under the influence of alcohol the majority of the time, he simply didn’t see it, or didn’t want to believe.  He stupidly thought he was the only one on the receiving end of their father’s temper.  But those scars, the faded ones that had been there for years, that meant his father had beaten Daryl as a young boy.  Merle being nearly a decade older, that meant… He couldn’t bear the thought, and took a stumbling step back until he hit the wall.  At that moment, the door burst open and in strode a ponytailed blonde in a baseball shirt and jeans, wire rim glasses pushed up her nose, and an armful of files in one arm while pulling the laptop gurney in behind her.

 

“Oh, excuse me!” she gasped, her steps faltering as she caught sight of Merle in the dim light.  “Sir?  Are you aware of the time?” she asked, after setting down the files by the sink and wheeling the laptop over toward the chairs.

 

“Yeah, I…” Merle shrugged, gesturing toward Daryl, “He’s m’brother.”

 

“Ah, okay-”

 

“I jus’ wanted to make sure he was alright…”

 

“I’m Denise, by the way.  I’ll be working with Daryl on his therapy. Hmm,” Denise hummed thoughtfully. “He's sedated right now, obviously. He has had no major physical injuries, his life is not in danger. I can tell you that much.”

 

Merle nodded, his hands resting on his hips as his shoulder sank forward. 

 

“I'm sorry about your father,” Denise offered, standing nearer to Merle, speaking softly given the late hour.

 

“I'm not.  I left ‘im alone with that bastard,” Merle gestured to Daryl.  Had no idea he’d-” Merle cleared his throat and shook his head. “Had no idea he was doin’ to Dar what he was doin’ t’me.”

 

Denise looked at Merle and back at Daryl, who slept soundly despite their presence in the room. “He's going to be out until morning.  Tell you what, I'm going to park myself in that chair over there, get caught up on charts and his case.  He won't be alone tonight.  You go on, get some rest.  I'm think y’all are going to be needing each other.”

 

She made a point to keep her eyes on Merle’s glassy ones. “I promise, the system won't fail him now. We won't let it.”

 

“System fucked ‘im over… and who’s we? I ain't done shit to keep ‘im safe all our lives.  Best thing I could do is leave him the fuck alone. He don't need to be mixed up in my shit.”

 

“I respectfully disagree-”

 

“Ma’am, we Dixons? We're shit. Bottom of the barrel.  It’s drugs, alcohol, loose women, and run-ins with the law for us.  That’s it.”

 

“But you're his family-”

 

“He done got himself a new family. The Grimes? Good folk. They done more for him in the last few months than I could ever think of doing.”

 

Denise stood back a moment crossing her arms over her chest.  “I can see that him being here hurts you. That means you care. He's going to need to know that when he wakes up. He's going to need support-”

 

“He'll get it from the Grimes Family,” Merle held his hands up in surrender and backed his way out the door. “I cain’t help him right now,” his voice cracked, he shook his head and was gone. 

 

Denise stood there awhile before finally taking a seat. Seeking refuge in the quiet of the room so she could review her charts and get up to speed on Daryl’s history. There were copious notes from what Samuel and Evelyn had shared with the admitting doctor, she would now need to make sense of them before coming up with a protocol for Daryl.

 

 

* * *

 

 

Rick woke in his bed, his pillow still smelled of Daryl.  Staring out the window as the sun began to rise, he knew he had to get up and face the day.  And his parents.  And the line of questions they were sure to have after seeing him kiss Daryl full on the lips and hold him in his arms the night prior at the hospital.  With a groan, he sat up stretching his limbs and got himself dressed and ready to greet the day.

 

The scent of eggs and bacon greeted him as he descended the stairs.  He poured himself a mug of coffee and sat at the table opposite his father.  Samuel pushed his glasses up his nose, reading the last of some article in his newspaper before folding it and setting it down on the table next to his plate.

 

“Good morning, Richard,” he greeted Rick with a still sleep heavy voice.

 

“G’mornin’, Dad,” Rick sunk a bit in his chair, eyeing both Samuel and Evelyn, knowing the use of his full first name meant a conversation was coming.

 

“Anything you feel like discussing with us, Richard?” asked Evelyn, she scooped some scrambled eggs onto Rick’s plate, and brought over the plate of toast setting it on the table.  Rick’s stomach clenched, but he took a sip from his coffee cup anyway, giving himself a moment to pull his thoughts together.  His parents would be understandably furious with him.  While he had not outright lied to them, he had kept secrets.  But why should love be kept secret?  Why should something that makes him feel good, feel whole inside, be kept in the dark?  How was that right or even fair?

 

“You have questions, go ahead… I’ll answer ‘em.”

 

“There are no questions, Richard.  I think last night spoke for itself,” interjected Samuel, as he set down his reading glasses and folded up the newspaper.

 

“Are you taking precautions, young man?” asked Evelyn sternly, pulling her chair out and taking her seat opposite Rick.  

 

“I… uh-” Rick blushed crimson, and gaped at both his parents.

 

“Was there any reason you felt like you couldn’t tell us what was going  on?” Samuel asked, blowing on his mug of coffee before taking a sip.

 

“Well, I-”

 

“Do I need to have a conversation with Daryl?” Evelyn interrupted, snapping her folded napkin out and laying it across her lap.  “Do I need to have ‘the talk’ with both of you?  Or can I trust that you two are behaving like responsible young adults?”

 

“Evie, let the boy speak,”

 

“Boy.  You said it.  My boy.  My beautiful baby boy is in a relationship and couldn’t even tell us about it!  Richard!  Truly, what have we done that was so awful that you couldn’t share something like this with us?”  Evelyn had begun to tear up, not so much upset that there was a relationship going on, but rather that it had been kept secret from them.

 

“Momma, I’m sorry,” Rick pleaded.  “I am.  I… to answer your question, yes we are being responsible about things.  They taught us about condoms in Sex Ed.”

 

“Good.  Good boy.  That is a relief, Richard.  Thank you.  A mother worries, you know.”  Evelyn shook her head as she took a nibble from her toast.  Samuel reached out to cover her free hand with his own, giving it a gentle squeeze and she sighed in resignation. 

“Rick and I are going to have a chat after breakfast is over, sweetheart.  You’ve raised a good boy, let’s have a little faith, hm?”

 

“That goes without saying, Samuel.”  She smiled gratefully at both the men at the table, “It’s been a rough 24 hours.  But I’m going to visit with Daryl this morning, replace that phone of his and see if there’s anything I can do to help him get settled in his new place.  A woman’s touch never hurts!”

 

Rick smiled to himself, stifling a laugh that threatened to burst from his throat, his mind dallying on the edge of the gutter.  While he finished his breakfast, he thought of Daryl, of his feelings for him, and of what he and his father were going to discuss once the meal was finished.  He was dragged from his reverie by the sound of Samuel pushing his chair away from the table.  He topped off his mug of coffee and stood by the door to the garage.  “Whenever you’re ready, Rick,” and he disappeared into the garage.

 

“Mom?”

 

“Yes, honey?”

 

“I… We didn’t really mean to keep it a secret, we just-,” Rick cleared his throat, and frowned.  “I don’t know what to say, but we didn’t NOT tell you on purpose.  It just kind of happened, and same sex relationships just don’t go over well here.”

 

“Richard… don’t ever feel like you need to keep that kind of secret from us.  We’re very open minded people, and something that brings such joy to your heart, and warms your soul?  That isn’t something that you need to keep to yourself.  I just want you to be happy.  I am sorry if I was harsh with you, it was just such a surprise, and… well, you’ll understand it someday when you have children.”

 

She cleared the plates from the table, scraping the scraps into the garbage can.  “Go on now!  Yer Daddy is waitin’ on ya!”

 

Rick sighed, getting up from his seat and walked over to the garage.  He passed through the door to see his Dad wearing his safety glasses and working on some piece of metal he had held by a vise.

 

“Anything I can help with?” he asked, grabbing his own glasses from the shelves by the work bench.

 

“Hmm,” Samuel nodded.  “Just plug in that grinder, I need to smooth the edges down on this pipe.  Mom’s tail pipe was rusted up pretty good so I’m going to weld this on.  Temporary patch job.”

 

Rick did as instructed, watching as his Dad’s strong hands went to work, and the sparks flew off the grinder as it ground into the metal, setting off like fireworks on the 4th of July.  He’d set off a set of his own fireworks with kissing Daryl in front of his parents, but he found that despite the initial awkwardness of them knowing, he didn’t care.  He loved Daryl, of that he was sure.

 

“I’m going to keep this simple, because I am old and I am tired.”

 

“Dad, you’re not-”

 

“Uh-uh!  Let me finish, son!”  Samuel’s face shown with the light of his smile.  “This summer… it’s the happiest we’ve ever seen you.  And I don’t know why we didn’t notice it sooner, but we didn’t.  And I suspect the reason you kept things to yourselves was not just this being the south, but also the positions that we hold within this community?”

 

Rick nodded, “Didn’t want you to get any flack at the station…”

 

“I can handle myself, Richard.  But I do appreciate the thought.  We don’t stand for that kind of crap in the Sheriff’s Department, we’re there to do our job, and that’s it.  And I’ve been there long enough to know who to watch out for, heaven forbid there be any unpleasantness.”

 

Rick nodded again, pushing the safety glasses back up his nose.

 

“The only thing that your mother and I will ask of you, is that you make good choices, and that you practice safe sex.  Be responsible.  Use condoms.  Take care of each other.”

 

Rick blushed, hearing his father talk of such intimate things was uncomfortable, but no more embarrassing than ‘the talk’ that they’d had when he was 13.  Samuel looked at his watch, and back to Rick, “It’s almost visiting hours, go freshen up and see Daryl.  You  might want to get there and warn him about the oncoming storm, Hurricane Evelyn…”

 

“Sure thing, Dad,” Rick chuckled, clapping his Samuel on the back as he left the garage to go prepare for the day.

 

* * *

 

Rick pulled into the parking lot of the hospital, pausing when he saw a familiar vehicle.  Momma Grimes.  He was too late.  She had beaten him there.  He hung his head, pinching the bridge of his nose and sighed.  He wasn’t sure how the woman had beaten him there given she had said Daryl’s phone needed replacing.  Must have been that mystical momma mojo where things just magically happen.  Pulling ahead, he parked the car and debated going up to rescue Daryl or sit in the car like a coward and wait for Evelyn to leave.  Split the difference, he decided.  He’d wait outside Daryl’s room instead.  Passing through the automatic sliding doors, he strode over to the elevators pushing the button for the appropriate floor, and then walking down a series of corridors until he was at the room.  He could hear Evelyn’s voice inside, the usual motherly banter, which he took as a blessing.  There was a set of chairs across the hall, so he settled himself down in them and opted to check in with Shane while he waited for his turn with Daryl.

 

“Daryl, honey… how did you sleep dear?   Have you eaten?  Is the hospital food up to par?  I can bring you breakfast, or snacks, or meals if it’s not to your liking.  And I’ve replaced your phone.  I’ll ask that you please not toss it in the woods, as this one I had to pay full retail value on and these darn things are a might expensive.  Let’s open these curtains and let in some sunshine, shall we?”

 

Daryl was sitting up, cross legged on his bed with the pillow on his lap struggling to get a word in edgewise.  But Evelyn fussed about the room, opening the curtains, straightening the sheets and blankets on the bed even with him in it.  Wiping down the counters by the sink in the bathroom, and evening flushing the toilet apparently.

 

She had come in accompanied by her purse and an inconspicuous brown paper bag.  The phone she had handed over to him, placing it on the bedside table and plugging it in to charge.  But the brown bag stayed next to her purse.  Something about it set him on edge.  There was more to her visit and he could feel the nervous energy coming off her as she busied herself around the room.

 

“I uh… I haven’t eaten breakfast yet but the nurse put my order in.  Said it’ll be up shortly.  Pretty sure it’ll be just fine.  Not like yer cookin’ but better than mustard sandwiches I woulda gotten at home with-”  He clamped his mouth shut.  The medication that they had pumped into him over the course of the night left him feeling woozy, and the words were a bit more forthcoming than usual.  He felt warm and fuzzy, some light confusion, and not quite as sharp and snarky as usual.  He hadn’t wanted to think of his old man, yet somehow the man had invaded his thoughts.  But not for long.

 

“Good, good… need to keep your strength up hon’.” Finding no more that she could do around the room, she hesitated in front of the brown bag before picking it up and sliding a chair closer to Daryl’s bed.

 

“There are so many things I want to say to you.  And for once in my life, I don’t even know where to begin…”  She took to pacing the room, the bag gripped tight in her hand.  “So, I’m just going to be honest.  I’m… I’m upset.  Angry.  Furious, really.  And for so many reasons.  I’m disappointed too.  I just…. Daryl, you stole from us.  You stole from ME.  You went into my home, took a firearm from my purse, got yourself intoxicated, and gave me the scare of my life.  If you were my child, I’d have no qualms about putting you over my knee, and-” She caught herself, her lips pressed thin, and her hand flew to her mouth, her chin quivering with the weight of her emotions.  Clearing her throat, she pressed on, doing her best to keep her voice even.  “You’ve not had it easy, honey.  I know that.  I sympathize, and I empathize, but at the same time, I am hurt.  HURT.  If there is anything you ever need, ANYTHING.  I want you to promise me that you’ll come talk to me.  Just ask.  I know asking for help can be the single most difficult thing, but… it would mean the world to me if you took that approach rather than just making poor choices.  Do you understand?”

 

“Yes, ma’am,”  Daryl was sure to look her in the eye, despite bringing his thumb to his mouth to chew the nail, a nervous habit.

 

“That vile man is gone now.  We’ll help you and Merle with the arrangements, don’t you worry a thing about it.  You need help.  You need to be here.  You need to begin to heal.  The path to recovery from this… life that you’ve lead thus far, it’s going to be a long and hard one.  But you can do it.  I know it.  That fire in your eyes… it’s never left.  Don’t lose your spirit, hold to it tightly and it’ll get you through.”  Evelyn smiled at him warmly, her eyes shiny and brimmed with tears.  “The mental health professionals here are exceptional, and there are programs and services that you will be eligible for.  I’m hopeful that you take full advantage of them, you deserve it and you’ve more than earned it.  There will be a social worker here at some point to go over all that with you, I’ve already grilled the nurses about it.”

 

Daryl nodded, clutching his pillow to his chest.

 

“Now onto this,” she put the bag down on the table, and wheeled it over so it was in front of Daryl.  “I took the liberty of purchasing some items for you at the pharmacy on my way in. I wanted to be sure that you had them when you’re discharged.  The doctor said it could be as soon as today, or in a week depending on how things go…”

 

Daryl’s brows rose on his forehead, and he bit his lip.  “You… want me to open the bag?” he asked.  When she nodded, he leaned over, reaching out a finger to unfurl the crumpled edge.  Squinting, he was able to make out a couple bottles, and a box.  Realizing what those items were, he blushed from the roots of his hair down to the tops of his feet.

 

“I, um…” he cleared his throat, wiping the sweat from his brow.  “Wha-, what is… I mean I know what that is, but-”

 

“Safety first.  Whether it’s with my Richard, or… someone else.  Safe sex is important amongst those who engage in homosexual or even heterosexual relations.  Now while it’s impossible for pregnancy to happen in same sex relationships, condoms are used for more than just to prevent unwanted pregnancies.  They protect you from sexually transmitted disease, which I can go into more detail with you should you happen to have any questions.”

 

“No!  No, no.  I’m good… I understand the mechanics of it, the logistics, the… not wanting to get the clap or the syphilis or whatever.  Oh, god…” He hung his head in his hand, praying to God that the earth would crack open beneath him and swallow him whole.

 

“Good… Good.  I’m glad we had this chat honey, but I’ve got several more errands to run this morning.  I’m sure Samuel will want to stop by and check on you, maybe later this afternoon?  I’ll have him text you first to make sure you’re not indisposed.”

“Yes’m, okay…”

 

“Alright, sweetheart.”  She walked over, kissing Daryl on the forehead, and smoothing his hair back off his face.  “Hm, you feel warm, I’ll turn down the thermostat on my way out.  And I’m gonna hit the nurses station and find out where your breakfast is, why it’s nearly 9:00!”

 

She dragged the chair back in place, and fussed over the thermostat before turning to Daryl and smiling.  “We’ll chat again soon, dear.  Have a great day!”

 

Upon Rick hearing his mother’s movements in the room, he opted to leap up from his seat and hustle around the corner to avoid seeing her in the hall.  He had an idea what she had discussed with Daryl, but the last thing he needed was an ‘after school special’ moment happening in the hallway of the hospital.  After hearing the door click closed behind her, he waited for her to move down to the elevators.  Of course she had to stop at the nurses station, he heard her tapping her shoe and giving the nurses a piece of her mind, telling them they better get that young man his breakfast before he starves and withers like an unwatered plant and drifts away with the next breeze.  Finally, the sound of her diminutive steps fading down the hallway gave him clearance to peek around the corner and walk straight into a doctor heading toward Daryl’s room.

 

“Oh, goodness!  I’m sorry!” The blonde wore jeans and converse sneakers, a white lab coat carried her name and credentials, her hair pulled back in a frazzled messy ponytail, and she pushed her wire rimmed glasses up her nose.

 

“Oh, shit… Um, I mean, sorry… I was just… I-,” Rick ran a hand through his hair, taking a breath before stepping aside so she could continue on her way.  “After you,” he gestured.  

 

“Uh, thanks,” the doctor moved toward Daryl’s door and knocked three times before entering.

 

“Oh… is-   
  


“Were you here to see-”

 

“Mm-hm, should I come back?”

 

“No, no! Come on in. Are you Rick?  You must be Rick.  He mumbled in his sleep.  I was with him all night last night, working on charts, and-,” she chuckled, pushing the hair back from her face.  “I was with him last night while he slept so he wasn’t alone, that’s all.  I only saw him briefly this morning and he was none to pleased to see me there with a stack of charts.”

 

“Oh, he’s… somethin’ special, not much of a morning person.”

 

“Right, well… come on in then!”  She pushed open the door and ushered Rick through.

 

“Richard Grimes, what the fuck dude? I just got the fuckin’  _ sex talk from your momma _ !”

 

“Oh!” The doctor gasped, stepping around Rick to better see Daryl. “Do you boys need a few moments, or…”   
  


“Shit, man… a warnin’ woulda been nice.  Your momma or the quack here.”  Daryl was fuming.  He had his arms crossed over his chest, his cheeks red and his face glowering at the two of them.

 

A knock came at the door, followed by a very cheerful, “Nutrition!”  The door was pushed open and an orderly came in with Daryl’s breakfast tray, placing on the table and moving it closer to Daryl’s bed.  “Can I refill your water?  Crushed ice? Lemme just take that for ya and get outta yer hair,” and just like that the orderly was gone. 

 

“That’s Theodore,” Denise explained.  “He works here all day and goes to school at night, going to be a nurse.  He’s got excellent bedside manner-”

 

“He probably don’t stare at people when they sleepin,” growled Daryl, pulling the tray over his lap and digging in without use of utensils.

 

“Alrighty, we are in a chipper mood this morning!”

 

Daryl glowered at her.

 

“So, Rick… you’re an important person in Daryl’s life, I take it?  Daryl?  Any qualms with me discussing matters with Rick present?”

 

“Ain’t got nothin’ ta hide!”

 

“What I mean is, are you giving me permission to discuss all things in your background, therapy, your medical records, etc with him present?”

 

“Like I said….”

 

“Alright, dear.  Get yer tummy fed, and I’ll do the talkin’.”

 

Daryl angrily stabbed at his scrambled eggs, his eyes shooting daggers at both Rick and Denise.  Rick stared helplessly at the floor, and Denise gaped awkwardly at the two before pulling two chairs closer so that Daryl was a part of the conversation even if he wasn’t a willing participant.

 

“Alright, so… As you know, Daryl has been medicated due to his agitation last night.  We will be putting him on some antidepressant medication as well as giving him some for anxiety.  Antidepressants can take up to a month to really have an affect.  During that time, Xanax is going to be our friend, as well as therapy and talking to our friends and family.  It’s important that Daryl reach out to others, and moreso that people reach out to him.  Daily phone calls, text messages, emails, etc, these can do wonders for a depressed state.  You don’t have to watch what you say or do, but remember that Daryl may experience numbing effects from the medications, or manic or depressive episodes.  These are very important to note and keep track of as they may precipitate a need to change dosage or meds altogether.”

 

Rick nodded along as Denise continued.

 

“Daryl, you’re employed, correct?”  Daryl did not respond, but his brows remained furrowed like that of a petulant child.  He didn’t blink as he continued to shovel food into his mouth.

 

“Um, yes… he works at a local hardware store,” Rick offered.

 

“Excellent.  Routine helps.  Having a predictable routine to follow helps one to focus on and manage their day.”

 

“How long am I gonna be in this room?” growled Daryl through a mouthful of food.

 

“Well, that depends on how badly you want out, and how willing you are to work with us and on yourself,” Denise answered honestly, pushing her glasses up her nose.  “You had a bit of a breakdown last night Daryl, you’ve been through a trauma.  Your upbringing, it… leaves a lot to be desired.  These are all things that you would benefit from working through.”

 

“Fine, let’s get this shit show on the road then.  What we gotta do to get my head screwed back on right, and outta this place?”  Daryl brushed the crumbs from his fingers, and ran a hand over his mouth, ignoring the napkin on his tray altogether.  He cracked his knuckles one at a time, twisted his head cracking his neck, groaned and sat up straighter.  “Alright, doc.  Do your worst!”

 

“Um…”

 

“Nuh-uh,  _ Richard _ .  You sit your pretty little ass right there, she said I can get out, yer gonna help.  Especially after havin’ to listen to yer mom talk about sex.  I need bleach in my brain, right now.”

 

Denise chatted away, asking questions and making various notes on her pad in front of her.  She asked about Rick too, their relationship, school, work, etc and before they knew it a couple hours had passed.  Daryl was noticeably tired, having taken to leaning back against his pillows, his head resting tilted to the side and his eyelids starting to droop as Denise and Rick went over medications he might go on, the various side effects, and what to look out for. 

 

“I’m thinking just a couple days stay for him.  If he continues to be… well, agreeable isn’t quite the right word, but if he can go along with our protocol and doesn’t have any further outbursts, I don’t see why he can’t discharge him.”

 

“Yeah, okay doc.  Good.  Now can I have some alone time with my boyfriend, or what?”

“Daryl, it’s been such a pleasure.  I’ll see you again this afternoon before the end of my shift and again tomorrow morning.  No hanky panky, you two.  Save that for the privacy of home, please!”

 

Rick blushed crimson, and Daryl burst out in an honest laugh as Denise waved her hand and disappeared out the door.

 

“I like her,” he mumbled, pulling the blankets up higher and holding out a hand to Rick.  

 

“Daryl, you growled at her.  I’m surprised you didn’t start barking and foaming at the mouth, dude.”

 

“Stop.  Just get her ass over here,” he patted the bed beside him and scooted over.

 

“Awww, does Dar-bear wanna cuddle?” Rick teased.

 

“Shut up, you fucker.  You owe me a week’s worth of blow jobs for not warning me about yer mom.”

 

“What exactly did she say to you?”

 

“I will not repeat a word, but that brown bag there?” He gestured to the package on the counter, “that’s got two different kinds of lube and a super pack of condoms.  Biggest box I’ve ever seen.  How much sex does she think we’re havin?”

 

“She didn’t…”

 

“Mm-hm, she did!”  Daryl pulled Rick’s arm around him and snuggled against his chest, seeking out the calming thrum of Rick’s heartbeat.  “But… it’s okay,” his voice started to slur with the need for sleep, “she’s good people, and I owe ‘er anyway.”

 

Rick hummed, pulling Daryl in tighter, resting his chin on the top of Daryl’s head.  Daryl slept for hours, and later that afternoon Rick finally managed to wiggle out from Daryl’s grasp and grabbed his phone.  He needed to update Shane, call Dale, and then thank Glenn profusely for his help in finding Daryl.  Samuel stopped by, and sat with Daryl while Rick stepped out in the hall to make his calls.  But still, Daryl slept.

 

“Is he at least breathin’?” Rick asked, as he came back into the room. 

 

“Mm-hmm,” Samuel nodded.  “It’s nice to see his face so at ease.  Shame it all had to come down to this.”  Sam gestured at the concrete walls, the sterile hospital atmosphere.

 

“Should only be a few days.  I gotta head back to school, but I’ll be home again next weekend.  You and Mom gonna be able to check on him?”

 

“Of course.  He’s family.  That goes without saying.”

 

Rick nodded his appreciation.  “But your mother is going to expect you home for dinner tonight if you’re going to be running back to Atlanta.”

 

“Yes, sir.”

 

“And he’s not going anywhere anytime soon,” he stood from his seat, his eyes running over Daryl’s sleeping face.  “See you at home soon, son.”

 

Samuel left the room, and Rick took the vacated seat.   He watched Daryl sleep awhile longer, and then wrote him a note and left it on his phone.   _ I’ll text you later, had to go home for dinner. ILY _

 

* * *

 

Rick was sitting at the table in silence as he picked at his plate. The last thing he wanted was to be at the kitchen table with his parents when all he really wanted was to be with Daryl. He blames everything on himself because he went away to the academy and he knew that if he was there with his boyfriend that none of this would have happened. They’d be looking at one another across the table. Cuddling in his bed and leaving his kisses on Daryl’s neck while in his arms. He knew that he’d have his arms wrapped tightly around the man he loved, but not at this moment. 

 

“Rick, sweetie, is everything okay? Dinner not good tonight?” Evelyn asked, concern weighing heavily in her voice.

 

“No, Ma, it’s good. I just... Not really hungry right now, I guess.” Rick sighed, rubbing his temple in frustration, and then felt his phone vibrate in his pocket.

 

He pulled the phone out, and looked at his parents. They didn’t say a word obviously realizing that it had to be Daryl.

 

“Everything okay?” Sam asked pushing his glasses further back.

 

“Yeah, dad. It’s Daryl.” Rick said and looked down at his phone. 

 

_ [D]: Hey. So, ‘m sittin’ here thinkin’ bout you. ‘m thankful that yer ma got me ‘nother phone. _

 

“Do you care if I message back?” Rick asked, out of respect, and as soon as he received the nod he typed back.

 

_ [R]: I’m thinking about you too. I just want to be there with you. I hate this. I hate that you have visiting hours. I just want you home and in bed. _

 

_ [D]: Is ‘hat right? I wish you were here with me too. Wouldn’ mind you bein’ behind me either.. Miss feeling you. _

 

Rick sat there blushing and smiling from ear to ear as he reread Daryl’s text.

 

_ [R]: Feel me how? Cause I know I miss wrapping you in my arms, kissing on you, and breathing you all in.  _

 

_ [D]: I miss all of ‘hat too. I really miss being in yer arms when yer pokin’ me.  _

 

Rick crossed his legs as he looked at his parents who were in a deep conversation about the weather and the neighborhood and just irrelevant topics to him.

 

_ [R]: Poking you? I don’t think I’m understanding... _

 

_ [D]: Y’know what would really make me feeeeeel betterrr?  _

 

_ [R]: Apparently, me poking you? But what would really make you feel better, baby?  _

_   
_ _ [D]: I’d like some portraits of you Richard.  _

 

Rick laughed to himself making sure not to draw attention to him and rocked his foot back and forth. He smiled and went through his phone and found the newest picture of him and sent it to Daryl. While waiting he picked some more at his baked potato and meatloaf. 

 

_ [D]: Very nice picture.. But not the ones I was talkin’ bout... _

 

In mid chew he laughed and began to choke on his food which drew more attention to him than he wanted.

 

“Son, are you okay?” Sam asked as he turned his attention to his son. 

 

After finally being able to stop coughing he nodded, “Went down the wrong tube.” 

 

_ [R]: You used my name as code for Dick? lol. I can’t. At the dinner table with ma and pops.  _

 

_ [D]: Tell ‘em ya need to use the bathroom. Come’n ‘m stuck in this bed, hard and wanting you right now. I feel so deprived right now.  _

 

Rick sighed rereading the text once again. He knew Daryl was sitting in his bed smiling. He could see himself standing there in the doorway looking at the man from the entry way. He knew Daryl would pat the bed wanting him to come sit with him and then pull him into a long heated kiss as he devoured the moaning into his own body. He knew that Daryl would pull him close as he laid on top of him bucking his hips. But the thoughts were cut short with another text from Daryl.

 

_ [D]: Pleaaaseee. I’ve been gooooood! _

 

_ [R]: Gimme a minute. _

 

“I uh.. Have to go use the restroom. I’ll be right back...” Rick muttered as he quickly ran to the nearest bathroom. 

 

Rick unbuckled his pants, unzipped, shoved down the front of his underwear and with his dick and balls perched on top of the waistband, he put his phone in selfie mode and snapped a photo of his member, already perked at half mast at the thought of attention from Daryl.

 

_ [R]:  Here ya go, one Portrait of Richard, as requested _

 

Knowing he had to go back to the table, and preferring to do so without a boner, Rick thought of cold showers, old ladies’ droopy tits, the smell of the water treatment plant as you drive by on a humid summer day, that was enough to produce a gag and he was able to put himself back together and be more presentable.

 

_ [D]:  I’ll return the favor later, fuckin doc just showed up and I’m sittin here with a pillow on my lap.  assholes... _

 

Rick chuckled as he walked back to the table, taking his seat and resuming eating his meal with a smile on his face.

 

“Any news?” asked Evelyn, passing the food to Rick for a second helping. 

 

“Doc showed up, couldn’t talk,” and he stuffed a fork in his mouth.  He couldn’t wait until later, he’d missed Daryl.  All of him.  And he looked forward to whatever Daryl might be sending him.

  
  


* * *

 

 

Three days later, Denise discharged Daryl to Evelyn’s care.  He was already halfway down the hall to the elevator before Denise even finished the discharge instructions, but it was all in writing as well so Evelyn tucked it in her purse.

 

“His meds will be available at the pharmacy for pickup.  Make sure he takes them with food so he doesn’t get an upset stomach.”

 

“Certainly, thank you very much, dear!”

 

“And tell him I’ll see him I look forward to seeing him at our next appointment!”

 

Evelyn smiled and waved as she hustled down the hallway after Daryl.  She threw her purse between the closing elevator doors forcing them to reopen for her to enter, greeting Daryl’s scowling face with her own terse smile.

 

“I trust you’ve made a note of your next appointment with Denise?”

 

Daryl growled and nodded, shoving his hands down into his pockets like that of a petulant child.  Evelyn shook her head, but smiled at Daryl taking a moment to smooth the t-shirt over his shoulders and brush the hair from his eyes.  It earned her an exceptional glower, and his arms crossed over his chest, but she ignored the attitude.

 

“Be kind to yourself, that’s all I ask.  And of course, do as your doctor tells you.  I’ve been through therapy and my own rounds with antidepressants, Daryl.  It’s not easy.  It’s a lot of hard work actually, and there will be days you feel worse before things get better.  But some day, you’ll wake up one morning and the sun will be shining, and you’ll find you’ve got a smile on your face before your mind has even awoken and reminded you of everything that has ever caused you to frown.  It’ll be worth it.”

 

The elevator dinged letting them know they’d reached the ground floor.  Evelyn ushered Daryl out the automatic sliding doors, shielding her eyes from the sun with her hand, her hand wrapped around Daryl’s arm practically dragging him along.  

 

“We’ll get your meds and some food for your apartment.  And I’ll pop in to see Dale and-”

 

“You ain’t gotta do all that!” Daryl protested.

 

“I just want to get you settled on firm ground, that’s all Daryl.  Let Dale know you’ve got the doctor’s clearance to return to work, and-   
  


“What does he know about… what happened?”

 

Evelyn stopped walking and turned to face Daryl, “What happened is a private matter.  Dale knows you were hospitalized, and he knows enough not to ask unnecessary questions.  You’ve got the cuts and bruises to prove something happened, but beyond that… none of his business.  We told him you were indisposed and we’d bring you round when you were cleared to return to duty.  We respect your right to privacy as does he.”

 

Daryl nodded, “Thank you…”

 

Smiling back at him, she gave his arm a squeeze.  “Come on now, dear.  Let’s get you settled.”

 

An hour later Evelyn unpacked the grocery bags into Daryl’s refrigerator and cabinets.  The entire apartment, small as it was, smelled of citrus and pine.  Evelyn had apparently given the place a thorough cleaning while he was away, and for that he was grateful.  This was a new beginning for him, and as much as he wanted to do it all on his own, he knew these gentle pushes in the right direction were what he so desperately needed.  Before long, he was standing in front of him with that adoring smile on her face, “Come on now, sweetheart.  Let’s go see what Dale’s up to!”  

 

Daryl half expected Evelyn to hold his hand as she led the way into the store via the back entrance.  They wound through several aisle before finding him aiding an elderly couple with some electrical extension cords.

 

“Daryl!” he greeted with a wide grin, “I am so glad you’re back, son!  There’s no rush for you to dive right back in, I’ve kept things scheduled light for you for the next week.”

 

“That sounds wonderful, Dale!  And Daryl, you’ll let Dale know if you need a break or if you have appointments that you’ll need to go on break for, rightt?”

 

“Yes’m,” Daryl nodded.  

 

“Perfect.  Well I’ve got someone I want you to meet, Daryl.  Evelyn, it’s wonderful to see you.  Do tell Sam I said hello, and I’ll be in touch about that round of golf he owes me.”

 

Daryl smiled gratefully at Evelyn as Dale led him away, and she waved as she moved toward the exit.  

 

“I did hire a new person while you were away.  Irma and I are wanting to travel more, or at least be able to enjoy a weekend away from time to time.  And in order to do that, I need to delegate more.  So, I’ve hired this fine young man here… well, he’s around here somewhere.  His name is Paul.  He’s about your age.  Interesting character, quite charming, I see a future salesman in him, and… ah, here he is.  Paul?  Paul, come here a second.”

 

From behind a pile of boxes emerged a not-so-tall man, with shoulder length hair and a well groomed beard.  Sky blue eyes with a hint of a twinkle as his full lips split into a warm smile.

 

“You must be Daryl,” he asked, holding out a hand.  Daryl stuttered, distracted by those big eyes peering back at him, before taking Paul’s hand in his own giving it a firm shake.  

 

“Folks call me Jesus too, but I answer to both.”

 

“Lest we not confuse our customers, he’ll be going by Paul in the store.  Even if he bears the likeness of the man on the cross,” Dale smiled cordially.  “You two may share some shifts, or you’ll alternate.  We’ll figure out a schedule depending on the flow of business.  Paul will work up front mostly with me, and Daryl, you’ll continue the odd jobs and mechanical work and whatnot?  Is that agreeable?”

 

“Yes, sir,” Daryl nodded.

 

“Excellent, Paul… let’s go teach you the wonders of sales tax reporting and the monthly reports we have to run for the accountant,” Dale ushered Paul away, but Daryl’s eyes followed as the young man turned back to smile at him before disappearing around the row of shelves.  Those blue eyes, the full lips, the warmth that stirred within… This was a new feeling, and not altogether unwelcome.  

  
  
  


~*~

  
  


The week went by so slow back at the academy for Rick. He did what he needed to do, to the point of skipping the parties that Shane got them into and focused on his homework. He had already had his things packed for the weekend as he had been planning on surprising Daryl with a weekend to themselves. Of course, he chose to go camping and only knew the basics of camping. But, he already had the tent and everything sitting out in his dad’s garage ready to be picked up. Thank god that Shane was nice enough to take him back to town so he could have his own vehicle, but also knew that Shane was doing it so he could pick up some girl back in King County. Monday was the longest. But as they went through Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday, he woke up bright eyed and bushy tailed causing Shane to have to ask questions. 

 

“Brother,” Shane said as they walked over to the next building for one of their classes.

 

“Hm?” Rick smiled and checked his watch. 

 

“You’re, uh, in a good mood today,” Shane stated and looked at Rick who was beaming with excitement. 

 

“Well, it’s the weekend, Shane. I have all my homework done and I have something planned for the weekend,” He said and looked back at his watch. He sighed realizing that it was like watching a pot of water coming to a boil. Slow. 

 

“Like what?” Shane asked as they turned in sync down one of the halls. 

 

“Well, Dad’s letting me borrow the camping gear and all that stuff we used to go camping when we were younger, figured Daryl might like to be alone with peace and quiet after everything.” 

 

“How’s he doing? He seem okay with you having to come back?” 

 

Rick looked at Shane and realized that they never really talked about it. He never asked how Daryl truly felt about him leaving again after less than 72 hours of his father dying, the psych drugs. He just seemed to not worry about it. 

 

“Rick?” Shane asked bumping his elbow into Rick’s side. 

 

“Uhm, better. He’s on some medication now and has appointments with the shrink to help him work through his issues. He seemed better. Happier.” 

 

“Happy to see you?”

 

“Well, wouldn’t you? My face is one of a kind. And, I’m an one of a kind person as well.” 

 

“And your head just grew bigger than Texas.” Shane chuckled and rolled his eyes as they then walked out of one building to head to the building that their Basic Law class.

  
  


~*~

 

It wasn’t long after their Basic Law class that their Firearms and First Responder classes were over and they were back in their dorm room. They were in there long enough for Rick to grab what he needed and then they were out of the door. Within 15 minutes they were on the road heading back to their hometown. He got as comfortable as he could in Shane’s truck to nap so it could make the trip go by in a flash. It didn’t take long that since he had fallen asleep that Shane break checked the car making him fly forward and wide awake. 

 

“Damn, Shane. Couldn’t have just said that we’re coming into town?” Rick sighed and rubbed his eyes. 

 

“Thought that’d be funnier,” Shane smirked and turned down Rick’s street. 

 

Rick rolled his eyes and stretched as best as he could while Shane drove up on his house. 

 

“Have fun this weekend, brother.” Shane smiled his  _ naughty _ smile as Rick opened his door. 

 

“Shut up.” 

 

“I’d rather not. I think it’s cute. Little Ricky is in love.”

 

“Dude, shut up-” Rick smiled, rolling his eyes as Shane cut him off.

 

“You driving back up to school on Sunday?” 

 

“Yeah, I’ll be driving back.”

 

Shane nodded to Rick and waited for him to grab his backpack from the bed of his truck before driving off. Rick watched as Shane drove off and walked in his parent’s house through the garage placing his backpack of clothes and supplies by the camping necessities. His parents were gone for the weekend so he packed some snacks, drinks and whatever else he could find and then walked back out to the garage. 

 

He put the camping materials in the bed of his Ford F250 plus his bag of clothes. He pulled his phone out and texted Daryl to let him know he was on his way, and then he pulled out of the driveway and headed towards the main street where the shop. 

  
  


~*~

 

Rick pulled to the first open spot that was right in front of Dale’s shop and saw Daryl standing outside with a cigarette in his mouth. He sat there realizing that Daryl didn’t see him pull up and all he could do was smile. That was the love of his life and best friend. He was getting 48 hours of alone time with Daryl which meant the world to him. But, it wasn’t long ‘til Daryl appeared on the side of Rick’s window tapping on it to have him roll it down.

 

“What’re you doin’ man?” Daryl asked tossing the spent cigarette to the side. 

 

“Was busy staring. Sorry.” Rick smirked and began opening his door until Daryl pushed up against it stopping him, “What’re you doing?”

 

“If you get out of the truck and hug me-” Daryl stopped looking back at the shop knowing that Dale and Jesus were inside working.

 

“Well, get in then. We still gotta stop and get some lighter fluid,” Rick said as he unlocked the door winking at Daryl.

 

“I’m glad that I really know you. Otherwise, I’s be thinkin’ yer a psycho killer takin’ me to ‘he woods to kill me and bury me.” Daryl said as he climbed inside smiling at his boyfriend. 

 

“How was work?” Rick asked as he pulled out and intertwined his fingers in Daryl’s. 

 

“Eh. It went alright,” Daryl grunted as he kicked his feet up on the dashboard while rubbing Rick’s thumb, “I’s missed you.” 

 

“I’ve missed you too. It’s been what? A week since I had to go back to school. It went by _ so _ slow. Most of my days I just want to quit school altogether, build a shack in the woods and live there with you.” Rick smiled gently and looked over to Daryl who grunted and smiled to himself.

 

“All but a week and you miss me more than I ever could have imagined. It’s-.”

 

“It’s what?” Rick smirked as he pulled into the parking lot of the small grocery store.

 

“Shut up.” Daryl laughed as he took his seat belt off as they parked. 

 

Rick chuckled to himself as they both got out and walked into the store. They walked like friends in the store, chatting about life. Growing up in the south and even in a small town it was frowned upon for two people of the same sex to show any sort of affection unless it were family. Rick was walking with the cart as he grabbed the coals, lighter fluid, and some canned food for them as well. As they reached the register, Rick was greeted by Beth who was working. 

 

“Rick? When did you get back into town!? Get over here and hug me!” Beth squealed as he reached over and hugged him, “You look so different.” 

 

“Back for the weekend. Going camping. I don’t look that different. How are you and the family?” he asked, picking the the bag of coal up for her to ring up. 

 

“We lost mama a few months back. Daddy’s drinking again and Maggie- She’s so consumed with Glenn that well, y’know. We all have our own issues.” she forced a smile and began ringing up the rest of the things, “How’re you Daryl? Don’t think that I can’t see you behind Rick.”

 

“Good. Uhm, Rick, I’m gonna go out to the truck and wait there. It’s a little to stuffy in here.” 

 

“Okay? I’ll be there in just a few moments.” Rick lovingly smiled at his lover who grunted his response and walked out of the store.

 

“Is he okay?” Beth asked as he bagged the rest of his items.

 

“Yeah, he’s okay.” Rick smiled at the young girl who finally hit enter after nodding to his answer.

 

“25.88” 

 

Rick gently sighed and pulled out his card and ran it through trying to get out of there as soon as he could.

 

“Would you like your receipt?” 

 

“Keep it, Beth. Hey, it was nice seeing you again. Tell Maggie and Glenn I said hello,” he said as he walked out of the store. 

He pushed the cart to his truck and saw Daryl leaning against the truck smoking, and he tossed it away from him.

 

“You know, you don’t have to keep tossing them out. I ain’t gonna tell you to.” Rick mentioned as he put the bed down. 

 

“Was done with it.” Daryl muttered and grabbed the bag of coal and tossed it in the back.

 

“Are ya’ okay?” 

 

“Yep.” 

 

“Okay.” Rick sighed as he put the remaining bag in the back, watching Daryl walk to the passenger door. “Daryl, will you just wait a minute?”

 

“Come on, Rick, I am fine. Let’s go,” he said in defeat and then turned around to face the other man. 

 

Rick was standing right behind him and watched as Daryl looked right at him, “Tell me what it is, Dar. Talk to me.” 

 

“Glenn-” He paused and looked down at his feet and placed his hand on Rick’s side, “He saw me at my worst time. You put him in a position he had no right to be in. And seeing Beth, knowing she’s related to Maggie and I even bet that Glenn will be end up marrying that girl,” he sighed shaking his head removing his hand as a older couple walked by the truck, “Can we just go?” 

 

Rick nodded sighing heavily and stepped back away from his lover, “Let’s go. It won’t take long from here to get there.” 

 

~*~

 

Rick turned the radio up to a comfortable level and had his left arm resting on the open window while the other placed on the wheel. He was lost in thought, but was brought back to reality when Daryl put in one of Rick’s mixed cd’s that was in the glove box.

 

“Do ya’ know what’s on this?” Daryl asked as he placed his right foot back on the dashboard. 

 

“Yeah, I do. Shane ended up hiding it because he hated one of the songs.”

 

“Hm. What one is it?” 

 

“Turn it to track 8.” Rick smiled as he put his arm on the back of the seat right behind Daryl. 

 

Rick sat there as the beat to  _ Wrongs What I Do Best _ played over the speakers. He softly began to sing and took his hand through Daryl’s hair. He knew that Daryl hated having his hair messed with but knew that he was the only one allowed to. 

 

_ “ _ _ Some men look for diamonds, Some men look for gold. I’m just trying to find myself, Before I get too old” _

 

“Please, please don’t,” Daryl pleaded to Rick who still went on to singing as he turned the music up. 

 

_ “ _ _ If my ship is docking in the east, You can bet I'd be heading west. I'm right in the wrong direction, 'Cause wrong's what I do best. Right in the wrong direction, 'Cause wrong's what I do best.” _

 

“This is _ why _ Shane hid the cd! You can’ sing to save yer life!” Daryl hollered over the music causing him and Rick to both laugh until they looked at one another with nothing but passion in their eyes. 

 

After a while, Rick pulled onto the dirt road as he drove a further road while rubbing his thumb over Daryl’s calloused hand. 

 

“We there yet? Damn near wasted all day driving.”

 

“Yeah, we’re here,” Rick smiled and parked the truck to the side. 

 

“This is where y’all used to camp?” Daryl asked as he got out of the truck. 

 

“Yeah, this is it.” Rick smiled as he started unloading the truck while Daryl looked around the wooded area. 

 

“Too bad I didn’ grab m’ crossbow.”

 

“Don’t need it.” Rick smiled as he tossed the bag that had the tent in it. 

 

“Could have taught ya how t’ hunt.” 

 

“Could have, but that’s not what this weekend is for.” 

 

Rick began unpacking the food and fuel next to the coal. He sat down as he watched Daryl put the tent together and smiled while watching the love of his life in his element. 

 

“Decide to not help?” Daryl asked as he looked towards the sun setting. 

 

“I like watching you. Figured I could get the food started.” Rick smiled as he started the fire. 

 

“Well, yer lucky it’s almost done. I have a few more pieces to put together. I hate these stupid wire tents,” Daryl grunted as he turned back to the tent giving it his full attention. 

The fire was built and warm. Food had been cooked and Daryl ate while he was finishing the tent up. After dinner Rick was holding Daryl in front of the fire with nothing but dead silence surrounding them. He was content. 

 

“You awake?” Rick asked as he kissed the top of Daryl’s head as he only got a grunt in response, “Are you sleepy?” 

 

“Ehh.” Daryl mumbled as he nuzzled more into Rick while the fire warmed them up some more, “Take it you’re only back for the weekend?”

 

“I’m almost done with the academy, Dar.” 

 

“You’ve been there for forever.” 

 

“I have 2 months left Daryl and then I am home okay. I am home for good. I’ve got a job already lined up here in King County. I’ll be home with you.”

 

“Livin’ back with yer parents while I’m livin’ ‘bove the shop? Sure sounds like a great compromise,” Daryl scoffed as he leaned up off of Rick and lit him a cigarette, moving to the side. 

 

“Who said anything about living back home? Why are you trying to start a fight? I am not doing anything wrong, Daryl. I-” he paused and pressed the bridge of his nose, “You’re mad at me because I went to school to fulfill my dreams? You were all for it because it’s what I wanted to do and follow in dad’s steps and here you are... Throwing it up in my face.” Rick sighed as he sat up straighter. 

 

“I ain’ startin’ nothin. Truth fuckin’ hurts man. I ain’ throwing it in yer face neither. You left, Rick. You left and left me here. You left and never tried to talk to me or anything.”

 

“Oh my god. We’re back on that? I told you that I was busy doing homework, Daryl. You don’t know how much I hate being away from you. You don’t know how much it hurts to know that Sunday I have to go back and leave you here. Goddamn, Daryl. I know life hasn’t been easy for you and I know that you have a hard time trusting people and letting people love you, but whether you realize it or not, I love you and I’m not going anywhere. Even if I travel back all the time just to see you for less that 72 hours than I will-”

 

“Only reason why you came back last weekend was because all ‘hat shit happened.”

 

“If that’s the only reason, then please, tell me why I’m sitting here having this same conversation with you that I have had with you multiple times before. Why am I here then, Dar? If I only came back-” 

 

Rick sat there as he watched Daryl walk into the tent grabbing his blanket and pillow and bring it out by the fire. He laid down covering himself up ignoring the staring of Rick.

 

“Okay? That’s it then?”

 

“I’m going to bed and then I’m going home tomorrow,” Daryl growled and closed his eyes.

 

“Sunday. We’re going back Sunday. And when the fire goes out you’re gonna freeze out here. So when you get over whatever the hell this is, then come into the tent-”

 

“Goodnight, Rick.” Daryl grunted as he turned on his side away from his boyfriend.

 

Rick growled under his breath in annoyance as he rolled his eyes. He walked into the tent and laid down getting as comfortable as he could. He hated going to bed angry. He always heard his parents say that it was never good to go to bed angry. He hated this. Where he was and his relationship. Of course they hit a rough patch when he left for the academy, but that never changed the plans and feelings he had for the other man. The other man was his lifeline and his reason for everything he did. He didn’t have a clue in the world on how adult life truly was, but he did know one thing that he really knew was that he loved Daryl, even when they were fighting or the fits that Daryl threw from time to time. He fell asleep as his mind finally quit running like a nascar race.  _ Go straight, turn left.  _

 

Rick jumped awake with the shuddering and heavy breathing from outside the tent and looked at his watch. He was only asleep for less that 3 hours. Even though it felt like it was at least 5 hours, he growled and stuck his head out of the tent. 

 

“Daryl!” Rick hollered to wake him up.

 

“What?” Daryl growled out in anger still.

 

“Just quit your hammerin’ and get in here!” he hollered and went back into the tent. 

 

Rick rolled over allowing room for Daryl to crawl behind him and they both fell asleep rather quickly. Sound asleep, Rick pulled Daryl’s arm over him and as they began to cuddle Daryl cried out.

 

“I ain’ nobody’s bitch!”

 

“Dar?” Rick whined out trying to calm the other man down.

  
“Get off me! Stop! Daddy, please! I didn’ touch it! Let me go!” Daryl cried out even more as he began tossing.

 

“Baby-”

 

“Get away! No! Please, daddy! Don’t do this to me.. I don’t know him! Daddy!”

 

“Dar!” Rick finally hollered and shook Daryl awake which caused Daryl to back up away quickly from Rick with tears falling down his face, “Daryl, you’re okay. Hey-”

 

“What’re you doing?” Daryl whimpered at Rick who was fighting to hold him. 

 

“You had a bad dream, You’re okay,” Rick sighed as he gently pulled Daryl into a kiss but was immediately shoved away. 

 

“Stop it. I’m-” Daryl stopped with the sudden realization of his boyfriend undoing his jeans in front of him along with his jacket, “What’re you doing. Just-”

 

Rick took a deep breath as he grabbed ahold of both sides of Daryl’s cheeks with his jeans wide open. He pressed his forehead to Daryl’s with his heart beating out of his chest and went into kiss him but was pushed to ground by Daryl. It took only seconds for the metal to be clinking from the belt and his pants to be pushed down to his knees. He wasn’t going to lie to himself, he loved the fact that Daryl was taking control but as soon as Daryl spit on his hand and he felt the warm liquid not only on his pink hole Daryl was already shoving his full girth inside of him. He groaned out in pain and in pleasure as soon as all of Daryl was inside of him. This was the very first time he’d ever been bottom but as soon as his undershirt was being pulled and the thrusting began, he was crying out. Moans he’d never heard escape from his mouth. He grimaced while the sounds kept escaping him and pounded his fist into the ground from the friction and thrust back more into Daryl who gave out a loud groan that sounded almost pained, thin and raw like it clawed its way out of his throat. They moaned as Rick pulled Daryl’s arms around his waist making Daryl fully sheathed inside and Daryl kept thrusting deeper and harder inside of him until he came full force inside of him. It wasn’t long until Rick had followed with his orgasm and they both fell asleep in one another’s arms. 

 

The following morning, Rick had woke up before Daryl. He opened his eyes feeling the hurt from the previous night’s activities that occurred and he sighed while pulling his boxers and jeans up, buckling them. He eased out of Daryl’s death hold and went out to start the fire up once more to make them both breakfast.  It was a new day, which meant a fresh start.  He planned to make the most of it, and absorb every second spent with Daryl in hopes of making those times apart feel less empty.  Just two more months… they would make it.  He smiled to himself as he stoked the fire and got those embers flaming once more.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Up next, the final chapter of part 1. Eeeek! There are three parts to this series. Our goal is to get chapter 11 completed by year end, and part 2 to begin posting in time for the mid season premiere. We HOPE to follow that time line, but as you know, real life sometimes gets in the way of planning, so don't hold us to it.
> 
> So, tell us, what do you think of this chapter?


	11. The Absent Touch

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aftermath of a not-so-fun camping trip, more relationship drama for our fair duo. Daryl meets with Denise for more therapy sessions, and Daryl befriends Jesus.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is it, folks! The resolution to Part 1 of this series. Please note, this chapter does contain a scene involving Darus (Paul and Jesus are used interchangeably). And said scene does include out of character actions for Daryl. Those of you who prefer not to read Top!Daryl will want to skip over that. This is a Rickyl story. There are two more parts to this series, and while we do delve into Rick's marriage to Lori, please keep in mind Rickyl is endgame.
> 
> For those of you who have made it this far with us, Thank You! We hope you enjoy this final chapter, and will stick around for the next part. ~FLTMHASR

Rick was now reaching town. The drive had been less than enjoyable due to Daryl being upset with him still. As he turned down on Main Street and pulled off to the side, he got out of the truck and walked around to Daryl’s side of the truck. He leaned against the truck looking at Daryl through the window who kept staring ahead refusing to look at Rick. 

“Daryl, come on. You seriously can’t be this mad at me,” he spoke and dropped his head and went to open the door but Daryl had locked it, “Damnit, Dar, I don’t want to do this today. You’re acting like a fuckin’ child right now in front of the entire town!” 

“A fuckin’ child!? Seriously? Fuck you and leave me be!”

“I can’t do that because you’re in my goddamn truck so even if I wanted to just leave you alone, I can’t! Now will you just stop and talk to me. You ain’t talked to me the entire drive back home!” Rick screamed through the window. 

“What is wrong with you! You started this!” Daryl yelled unlocking the door and rolled his eyes. 

Rick opened the door and forced Daryl to look at him, “What’s wrong with me? What the hell is wrong with you!? I came home to take you out for the weekend and we fought the entire time! You didn’t want to be touched and every single time I touched you, you flinched! You never flinched when I went to touch you. So you tell me, Dixon, what is wrong with you!” 

“Don’t matter.” 

“Obviously it does, Daryl. Plus, I need to talk to you about school, again.”

“Might as just tell me, Rick. Ain’t got nothing to lose now.” Daryl muttered as he grabbed his only bag and walked away from Rick. 

“You know that I’m going back to school for only two more months. It’s just two months and then I’m all yours. I don’t want you to be upset with me.” 

“Seriously? Mad, upset,- whatever. The point is that you’re gonna do what you’re gonna do. Go back finish whatever you need done and forget that I ever existed!” 

“Forget that you ever existed!? Where is all this coming from, Daryl? You supported my dreams of being a cop and told me to go and that nothing would change! You told me that you would love me no matter the distance but right now, you’re pissed at me because I have to leave to go do my dream that you supported!? What and when did that all fuckin’ change, Daryl? Do you not understand that I am doing all of this for  _ you _ ! Everything I have done has been for you!” Rick was now screaming as spit flew out of his mouth and his face was turning red. 

“For me!? For me!? Oh you have got to be kidding me, Rick! We’ve been together for what? Six months. And then all of a sudden everything has been for me!? I ain’t no charity case for you, your parents or Dale! We’ve barely been together more than a half a year and you fuckin’ pull that line on me!? Think we were gon’ ride off into the sunset? Live happily fuckin’ after? Fuck you, Grimes. The hell with all y’all! You go back to your perfect life and don’t talk to me like you always have and make excuses after excuses! And y’know, I ain’t the only one who’s changed. Think on that!” Daryl screamed back and walked to the back of the store, blowing off steam.

 

~*~

 

Rick watched as Daryl walked off. He could have sworn that he saw steam blowing out of his lovers ear. He didn’t know where he went wrong. He loved Daryl more than anything in his life, but didn’t understand why he was so mad at him. He supported him and wanted him to do what he always loved. He knew that finally having his own place, job and with his daddy gone that Daryl had changed. 

He sighed when Daryl was out of view and walked around his truck to the driver side and got in. He turned the key but let the truck idle as he watched to see if Daryl came out. Deep down he knew that Daryl wasn’t coming back out and he knew that he shouldn’t have lost his temper like that with Daryl. Especially after everything he’d been through, Daryl was fragile. More fragile now after his daddy dying and being around Merle more often. He was scared and of course, Rick understood that. Everyone in his life had left him which in that moment he understood completely. But instead of getting out of his truck to go find his lover he put the truck in gear and drove off. Back to school where he was supposed to be. Or was he supposed to be with Daryl?. He hit the steering wheel feeling his heart break inside of him and turned the radio on as he was now passing the sign,  _ Exiting King County _ .

 

~*~

 

Daryl walked around the corner of the building and leaned against the broken brick wall. He sighed and felt the burning in his chest creeping up then punched the wall as tears began falling down his cheeks. He was upset and pissed off as he wanted nothing to change between them except that they have. Everyone had left him and even though Rick was right about him supporting his dreams and wanting nothing but the best, he couldn’t quite grasp onto why Rick never had him up there or had taken him with him. He had another two months to go without Rick and deep down he knew that everything was going to go back to how it had always been: barely hearing from Rick, missing each other’s texts and phone calls, sleeping alone without having him in his arms. 

He turned around trying to get one last glance of Rick, but all he saw was the truck driving off slowly and he put his head down. His boyfriend was now on his way out of town and away from him. As he made himself back into the store he kept his dead down and walked right upstairs towards his apartment. As he made it inside, he shut and locked the door then stripped down completely as he then gathered all of his laundry and started it. He grabbed him some clean clothes and got dressed then sat on his couch and pulled his cellphone out and scrolled down to Denise’s number.

He sat with his finger hovering over top of the ‘send’ button.  His mind and heart were reeling, and he never felt so utterly lost in all his life.  Abuse be damned, he understood that more than matters of the heart.  And right now, his heart was aching.  He couldn’t reach out to Merle, because Merle would only chastise him and make him feel worse.  He didn’t have any friends, and he was too embarrassed to even consider getting in touch with Glenn.  The Grimes were a wonderful family but he honestly felt the need to separate himself from them just a bit.  So what did that leave?  Just his therapist.  Just Denise.  Now she had encouraged him to get in touch when things got hard.  This was a new experience for him, and given the stresses of his life over the past few months, despite the warmth and love and security had had been receiving, it was still a significant adjustment that he had yet to truly settle into.  It was a mystery to him, and he never felt more like a child in that moment who had lost his way.  

“What the fuck… here goes nothing,” he growled, hitting the send button, putting the phone on speaker and leaning back in his chair with his arms crossed over his face.

“Denise speaking, how may I help you?”

There was a pause, Daryl hadn’t thought this through beyond hitting that send button.  What was he going to say?  Where did he even begin?

“Hello…. Hello?  Okay, I’m pretty sure we’re still connected and I don’t want to make you think I’m a stalker or nothing, but… Daryl I know this is your number.  I’m hoping it’s you, but I’ll gladly speak to whomever I have on the line…”

Another long pause, and Daryl worked up the nerve to respond. “Yeah, it’s me.  I’m sorry…”

“Honey, sometimes that first step is the hardest.  We’ve talked about that.  But given that you’re calling me on the off hours… what’s up.  Tell me what’s goin’ on.”

“You don’t sound very-”

“I take a more personal approach outside the office, and with my special cases. Not that you’re a special case.  Or in need of extra handling. That’s not what I’m saying at all.  Just that there are some that I have more concern for- No, that’s not the right word either. I… dammit.” 

Daryl heard her heave a big sigh, he could picture her frowning and rubbing her hand across her forehead in frustration.  If he didn’t know her better, he’d have thought she came across as a bit of an awkward dork.  Like maybe she didn’t have a clue what she was doing.

“And I thought I was weird,” he blurted out, a mirthful chuckle escaping his lips.

“I apologize.  Okay, I got my game face on now.  You called outside office hours which means you need something.  Tell me what’s going on with you.  We can chat a bit over the phone or we can move up your appointment to... tomorrow morning at 9:30?  Which would work best for you?”

“Both...  Both is good.  Can I do both?”

“Absolutely.  Wanna give me a basic run-down of what’s goin’ on?  What happened that got you so worked up that you stepped outside your comfort zone to call in?”

“I went camping with Rick this weekend.  It was supposed to be a… we don’t do romantic shit er nothin’, but was supposed to be like just us.”

“Was it?  Just you two?”

“Yeah… but it wasn’t the same.”

“Why?  What’s different.”

“He ain’t ever available to talk or text.  Don’t call me back or nothin’.  He done moved on.”

“Daryl, think about what you just said.  He took you camping, right?  That’s spending time with you.”

“Yeah, but-.  Forget it, this was a mistake.  I’m sorry to bother ya…”

“Daryl, don’t hang up just yet.  I want you to take one of those Xanax I prescribed you.  Have yourself something to eat.  If you’re feeling safe enough with yourself, go for a walk.  Play video games, watch a movie, it can help distract you from thinking of Rick. Let that medicine kick in and it’ll take some of that tightness off your chest.”

“But-”

“Rick is at school getting an education.  You have gotten yourself a job, and an apartment. That is an improvement for you as well.  Are there any friends in town that you can get together with?  Anybody that hasn’t gone off to school and isn’t still in high school?”

“Not. Really.”  No way was he going to mention Glenn to her, that was just… no, not an option.  Glenn was good people but he had seen Daryl at his worst, and Daryl was pretty sure he would be red-faced for at least the next decade if he ever crossed paths with Glenn.

“Co-workers?  I’m not pushing you to go out and make new friends.  But it helps to have acquaintances to make small talk with.  Get together after work to go get a pizza or hang out.  Make connections.  That’s what this is all about, Daryl.  We’re going to fix some of those broken connections in your mind, help you get strong from within.  We also need to work on what’s outside you, and that’s working on creating a strong supportive group to aid you when you are feeling overwhelmed.”

“Oh…”

Denise let Daryl think on that for a few moments before she spoke again.  “I still want to see you at 9:30.  We’ll talk over this all some more. Are you feeling okay at the moment?  Little better?”

To be perfectly honest, he did feel some relief.  He still carried the weight of the world on his shoulders, but listening to Denise fall all over herself and then pick herself up by the bootstraps was a wonderful reminder that not everyone is perfect and not everyone is strong all the time.  And maybe… maybe he could meet up with Paul on his lunch break one afternoon.  Sit with him on the back steps by the loading dock..  Paul wasn’t all bad, after all.  He seemed decent.  Dale liked him well enough, trusted him with some of the more important day to day tasks.  His eyes were kinda nice, that same shade of blue as Rick’s.  And his lips, oh those pink lips-.

Daryl cleared his throat, pushing the thoughts from his mind, looking down to see that his pants had begun to fill out in ways that were not for general audiences.

“Yes, um.  Yes, much better… thanks Denise.  I’ll see ya in the morning.”

And he tapped the screen to disconnect the call.  Leaning forward to rest his elbows on his knees, he shook his head and sighed, looking down at his crotch that had betrayed him. 

“Seriously, man?  What. the. Fuck. was. That.”

  
  
~*~   
  
  


“Good morning, Daryl!” Denise cheerfully greeted Daryl, pulling the door wide and gesturing for him to enter the room.  The edge of his thumb was firmly planted between his teeth and in danger of getting thoroughly shredded by his worrying.  He took his seat, not on the couch, but in the sturdy arm chair by the window.  It put him at ease to be able to see the world outside while worked on his issues with Denise.

“First order of business… Are you taking your meds? Eating regularly? Sleep? Exercise?”

“Mm-hm,” Daryl nodded, his mind flashing back to the encounter with Rick in the tent over the weekend lent a nice flush to his cheeks.

“M’kay, tell me about your weekend then.  What did you do?”

Daryl flushed crimson, and slunk in his chair.  “Went camping.  With Rick.”

“And… please embellish for me?”

“Um…”

“Did you have a nice time?  Did you hunt while you were out there?  Fishing?  What did you two chat about?  Stuff like that.”

Daryl ran his hands through his hair, and leaning forward he picked at the seam of his jeans.  

“I’m new to this relationship crap.”

“Ah, now we’re getting somewhere,” Denise lightly teased.  She pulled out her notepad and had her pen poised to take notes.  “Go on, tell me more.”

“Rick and I… we’ve done things.”

Denise looked up from her notepad and seeing the cringe on Daryl’s face, she lightly prodded him forward.  “You’ve been intimate, is what you’re saying?”

Daryl nodded.

“You needn’t go into details and make yourself uncomfortable, Daryl.  But I’m all ears and no judgment if that is an area that you feel the need to discuss.”

“One night… well, I got mad at Rick and decided to sleep by the fire, but it got cold as hell and I guess my tossing and turning woke him up, so he made me go join him in the tent.  It was… a lot warmer in there, fell asleep quick.  But I had a dream.  A nightmare.”

“What was it about?”

“The usual, my dad.  Stuff.  He was not a kind man, I’ll leave it at that.”

“Okay, we’re going to discuss your dad at some point but today we can focus on your relationship as that seems to be troubling you the most today?”

“Mm-hm.”

“Okay, so you had this nightmare.  And then what happened?”

“Rick tried to reach out, comfort me. I was still disoriented, I guess.  Long story short, we started ripping each other’s clothes out of the way and-” Daryl covered his face with his hands, breaking out in a sweat and fairly certain his face was the color of summer strawberries.

Denise patiently waited for Daryl to continue, the words were right there, he just needed to let them flow.

“I don’t usually take charge in that department, but I did.  Didn’t even use lube, just spit and away we went.”

Denise waited again, but upon realizing that was as far as Daryl was going to go, she prompted him again.

“So, you two assume specific roles in intimate situations, is that what you’re saying?  It’s not versatile?”

“Um, what? I’m not sure what you mean.”

“When two men are together, sometimes they refer to one or the other as the Top or the Bottom.  If that’s traditionally how they do things, the terms fit.  Some relationships, it varies.  Depending on how the mood suits, there will be alternating as to who tops or bottoms.  That’s sometimes referred to as versatile.  There’s a lot more to that, but we can keep things simple for the time being.”

“Okay,” Daryl chuckled awkwardly.  “Yeah, so I usually… bottom. But not that time.”

“Do you know why you switched roles?”

Daryl shook his head, “Not really.”

“Without climbing into your head and having access to that mind of yours, I’d say it was more a primal reaction.  Heat of the moment thing.  I can see you as being versatile, with the right person.  But there’s no harm in being the bottom.  Changing things up a bit can refresh a relationship.  Intimacy isn’t just having sex, Daryl.  It’s spending time together.  It’s touch, it’s talking, it’s… just being there for someone.”

“Hm,” Daryl nodded, his eyes narrowing to a squint.   _ Spending time together, touch, talking, being there.  _ That was what was really weighing on him.

“Tell me why you’re looking at me like that,” Denise prodded.  “I see something I said got your wheels turning.”

“That last bit.  That’s what… that’s… Rick and I fought this weekend.  Him being away at school, and me… I ain’t handlin’ it well.  I know he’s busy with class and all but the guy is literally next to impossible to get in touch with.  I’m lucky if I get a text or two a day.  Phone call once or twice a week and even those only last a few minutes.  I get upset, and then he gets pissed and… How do we fix it?”

“When’s he due back?”

“Few months…”

“Mm-hm, okay.  For starters, you’ve not been on the meds long enough to be benefiting from their effects yet.  So you will be prone to more anxiety, more frustration, easy to trigger.  When you feel those episodes starting to come on, take your Xanax.  You won’t always need it, we’ll teach you some coping mechanisms but you’ve had so much trauma, everything is new and fresh and those wounds are gaping open sores.  Try to keep that in mind before you react, ask yourself if your responses are justified or not.  If not, you’ll know maybe we need to talk about increasing meds or changing them.”

“Oh.”

“Our time is nearly up, but I want you to try what I suggested on our phone conversation.  I want you to try to reach out to someone, coworker, former classmate, your brother… anyone.  Give yourself a break.  Do something that you enjoy doing even if it’s hunting or fishing, things you did before Rick.  Create your own bubble, just as he has created his own.  You can and will still meet in the middle, but a little variety might ease your anxieties.  Is that something you think is achievable in your current state?”

Daryl shrugged, “I guess so.”

He didn’t tell Denise that Evelyn still kept in touch.  She would call and leave him messages, and he’d text her back much later.  He was lying to himself when he said he wasn’t avoiding her, but given she had gone out of her way for him with the phone, replacing the phone, bringing him into her home, and not casting him aside after he had wronged her; he owed it to her.  He knew she relayed the information to Samuel, as his texts stopped coming too.  People were busy with their own lives, he didn’t want to be a bother.  He was grateful for the peace of not having someone on him constantly, and it was something he needed to learn to do when it came to Rick.  Maybe he would sit with Dale when he had his lunch one day.  Jesus didn’t seem too bad.  He was polite, courteous.  Dale adored him, as did the customers.  He had a nice smile, and the way his blue eyes sparkled-

“I can’t promise anything, but I guess I can at least try?”

“That’s the spirit!  As long as you  _ try _ .”  Denise set the notepad aside on her desk and walked with Daryl to the office door.  “Thank you for coming in to talk, Daryl.  Your next appointment should be within a week’s time, but as always, don’t be afraid to call if you need to move things up.”

Daryl nodded and offered a small smile and half-hearted wave as he left.  He took the long way back to the hardware store.  He was on the schedule for the day, but Dale had him in the back working on some engine repairs that didn’t need to be completed so he had some flexibility with his time.  Not having to be at the mercy of the customers was a blessing, but he did enjoy being close enough that he could hear the goings on inside and catch up on the little bit of gossip that came through the door when Dale chose to chit chat with a friend nearby.  He always felt emotionally spent after his sessions with Denise, but today there was a touch of hope.  

Pulling into the parking lot behind the hardware store, Daryl parked near the loading dock.  It was late morning on a weekday, a quiet time when many of them took their breaks.  And there was Jesus, leaning back against the wall, lighting a cigarette.  He smiled and waved at Daryl when he hopped out of his vehicle.

_ Oh god, what do I do now? _ Daryl thought to himself.   _ Don’t be stupid, just go say hi to the guy.  Ain’t that hard, asshole. _

He cleared his throat, and walked up the steps standing near Jesus, nodding to him in greeting.

“Want one?” he asked, gesturing with the cigarette.

“Uh, sure,” Daryl responded.  Jesus handed Daryl the one that was between his fingers already, the one he just had his lips on moments ago.  Daryl tentatively reached out and took the cigarette, holding it between his fingers, looking at the burning embers before raising it to his own lips.  It still held the warmth of Jesus’ mouth, slightly damp where his lips had touched it.  With his eyes on Jesus, he set it to his own, and took a long drag, holding it a moment before letting it slowly angling his lips so the smoke blew away from them.

Jesus’ eyes darkened minutely as he lit another cigarette for himself.  “You having a good day today?” he asked, cocking his head to the side.

“S’good, I guess.”  Daryl looked down at his feet sheepishly.   _ This is just small talk.  Be cool, man.  Be cool. _

“You gonna be around later?”

“Uh, yeah?”

Jesus chuckled, “Relax man, you’re wound tighter than a monkey’s nuts.”

Daryl huffed out a chuckle and willed his shoulders to settle down, and rested a hand on his cocked hip.

“Was thinking of hitting the diner next town over,” Jesus continued.  “Don’t much care for eating alone.  Want to come with?”

Daryl blinked.   _ Dinner? People had to eat, right?  You can do this, Dixon.  It’s not a damn date or nothing.  Why are you thinking it’s a date?  You’re with Rick, idiot!  Paul is just bein’ nice.  And a burger sounds better than the leftover pasta hiding in the back of the fridge. _

“Dar?” Jesus questioned, “Where’d you go?”

“Oh yeah, sorry.  Um sure, yes. I’ll be ‘round.”

“Good,” he smiled, a toothy grin.  “I’ll come see ya after.  Alright if I come knock on your door if you’re already finished with your work for the day then?”

“Mm-hm,” Daryl squeaked, clearing his throat again.  “Yep, that’d be fine.”

Jesus finished his cigarette, putting it out against the concrete at his feet before tossing the butt into trash can nearby.

“Glad we had this chat, Daryl.  You have yourself a good afternoon.”  He smiled at Daryl as he backed through the door.

And Daryl’s cheeks went aflame.   _ Good god, what the hell is wrong with you? _

His phone buzzed in his back pocket, and he pulled it out looking at the screen already knowing who it was.

R:   _ Hey. _

D:  _ Hey _

R:  _ I’m sorry _

D _ : Me too _

R:  _ Been thinking about you, didn’t sleep last night.  I miss you _

D:  _ Miss you too _

R: _ I’m trying, I swear it.  I’m almost done with Academy, then I ain’t ever leaving your side again _

D:  _ K _

R:  _  You don’t believe me? _

D:  _ Ain’t that.  Just don’t want to hold my breath or nothing. _

Daryl waited for a response but there was none.   _ Figures. _ So he sat down at his workbench and started removing the screws on a lawn mower carburetor that was in for repair.  It was a half hour before his phone dinged again.

R:  _ Sorry got caught texting in class. _

D:  _ Don’t get in trouble on account of me _

R:  _ I don’t want to fight, please _

D:   _ Wasn’t fighting.  Busy.  Got shit to do. _

R:  _ Oh. Alright, I’ll leave you to it then. _

Daryl shook his head and tossed his phone back down, trying to focus on his own work.  An hour later he was done, and still fuming.  Sure, Rick had tried to reach out to him, but how long was this going to last?  He almost couldn’t wait for Jesus’ shift to be over so he could have the distraction of good food, and those big blue eyes to look at.  He needed a break from the tightness in his chest and the frustration of not having his lover near.

 

~*~

 

Daryl waited for Paul’s shift to end from the comfort of his apartment.  He had gone ahead and ordered basic cable television service, so he could be kept aware of the current goings-on in the community via the local news.  He also included an internet service so he wouldn’t run the Grime’s phone bill by using all the data on his phone.  Eventually, he’d get it swapped to his name to handle his phone bill all on his own, but that would come in due time.

He got lost in playing a game of Candy Crush on his phone, and actually jumped when Jesus knocked on his door.  He was dressed in what he thought of as comfortable clothes, a decent pair of jeans and a clean t-shirt.  That was about as dressed up as he ever got, and besides, they were only going to a diner.  And it was NOT a date.

He pulled the door open, and was greeted with a wide toothy grin from Jesus. 

“Ready to roll?” Jesus asked.

“Yeah, sure,” Daryl responded, walking out and pulling the door shut behind him.

“Ride together or you wanna follow?” asked Jesus.

“Oh, uh… I guess if you’re already headed back this way after, we could ride together.  Don’t make a bit o’ difference to me.”

“I drive a motorcycle.  You opposed to ridin’ bitch?” Jesus asked, with a grin.

“Oh hell,” Daryl chuckled. “As long as the weather is gonna hold… I got my own helmet.”  He stepped inside his door long enough to grab his helmet and followed Jesus down the stairs. 

He climbed on the back of the bike behind Jesus, strapping his helmet in place and then placing his hands at Jesus’ hips as he started the bike.  He had enough experience driving a motorcycle that he knew what to do as the passenger. Wrapping his arms tight around Jesus’ waist was unnecessary, as far as he was concerned.  Even if he would delight in the warmth of another body against his.  

_ Oh shit.  No.  Brain, do NOT go there.  Seriously, wtf? _ He scolded himself as he felt his groin becoming aware of the closeness of Jesus’ body.  Blessedly, the other man made no reaction other than looking over his shoulder to see if Daryl was ready to go.  Daryl nodded, and he slowly accelerated, taking it easy as they got going down the road.  Daryl was able to relax enough feeling the wind in his face.  His knees and thighs were pressed tight to Jesus, there was simply no avoiding that.  And he leaned into the turns with him, they moved together nearly as one.

It was a short drive to the diner that Jesus had mentioned.  And thankfully Daryl had been there before so he was familiar with the menu, and the waitresses.  These things were important to those that dealt with social anxieties.  And lucky for him, this diner was so far out into the sticks, they didn’t give two flying craps who you were, who you were with, or what you were doing as long as you paid your bill and gave the waitstaff a decent tip.  So two men riding into the parking lot on the same bike was hardly something to bat an eyelash at.

Even so, Daryl made quick effort not to linger. And was prompt with removing himself from the bike, and hanging his helmet from the handlebar.  The had parked close enough that he would be able to see the bike and helmet from their seat within the building.

Hayley greeted them, and showed them to their seats; handing them menus and letting them have some time to peruse it before taking their order.

“So, Daryl… what kind of food do you eat?” asked Jesus from behind his menu.

“Meat?” Daryl responded.

“Right… ok.  So burgers?

“Pfft, duh,” Daryl grumbled.

“I don’t recommend the steak here, but their burgers are top notch.”

Daryl hummed as his eyes ran over the menu.  He settled on a bacon cheeseburger, with a side of onion rings and fries, and a soda to drink. Skipping lunch had not been a smart move and his stomach eagerly let him know it was ready for sustenance by emitting a long low growl that could be heard by Jesus across the table.  

Jesus dropped the menu down, peering over it at Daryl’s stomach and back at Daryl’s now reddened face.  

“Their sundaes are outstanding, fresh ice cream made right here on the premises-”

Daryl’s stomach rudely interrupted and spoke for him, groaning in agreement that an ice cream sundae would go over quite well after gorging himself on his dinner. Daryl dropped his head to the table with a thud, took a few deep breaths and sat back up chuckling.  His cheeks cherry red, but his eyes amused as Jesus’ shoulders shook with his silent laughter.

“Don’t skip out on meal breaks, dude!” he chided, with a grin, to which Daryl merely rolled his eyes and nodded.

Hayley returned to take their orders, delivering their beverages swiftly, and leaving them alone to chat while their meals were cooked up.

“So… Daryl, tell me your life story,” Jesus stated, leaning his elbows on the table and taking his straw into his mouth, between those two full pink lips, letting it loll on his tongue a moment before he took a sip.

“Uh…” Daryl frowned, leaning back in his seat and crossing his arms over his chest.”

“I’m joking, man.  Relax. I mean, I’d love to get to know you better and all, but I respect your privacy too.”

Daryl huffed a sigh of relief, and nodded.  “M’kay, ain’t much to tell really.  Shitty upbringing, rather not get into that.”

“Mm-hm.  But you seem like things are better now? Or, you’re at a different place in life?”

“Out on my own for the first time ever, yeah.  It’s nice, but I’d rather have my b-,” he cleared his throat and shook his head.  No, he wasn’t going to talk about Rick.  He wasn’t going to tell Jesus how much he missed Rick, and the feel of his hand on Daryl’s, and the warmth of sleeping beside him in bed.

“Rather be with… your boyfriend?  That guy with the curls and the sky blue eyes?” Jesus teased, taking another sip and smiling knowingly at Daryl.

“Don't want no shit about it,” he growled out. “I know that type a thing ain't approved of ‘round here-”

“Shhh, Dar it's okay. Ain't got a boyfriend myself these days. Nobody seems to fit the bill, so to speak.” 

“So, you're…”

“Like you? Yeah.”

“Huh, interesting…”

“What makes you say that?”

“What makes you say that?”

"Didn' think you were like... Y'know..."

"What? Gay?" Jesus whispered squinting at Daryl who looked uncomfortable with the word.

"Yeah, that."

_ Ding _ .  Daryl’s phone dinged with an incoming text, interrupting the conversation.  Looking down, he saw that it was Rick.

“I uh, gotta take this…” He stood up from his seat.

“It’s a text, not a phone conversation.  Please, sit down, enjoy your meal, you can text and eat at the same time.  I don’t think it’s rude.”

So Daryl sat back down, holding the phone in his lap for privacy.

R:   _ You busy? _

D:   _ Eating dinner _

R:  _ Oh, anything good? _

D:   _ Burger and fries _

R:   _ Fries?  You out? _

Daryl frowned.  How was he going to explain this?  Going out to dinner with another man?   _ Fuck it _ , he thought.   _ I’m allowed to have friends.  If Rick can go do his workouts and study sessions with other people, then I can have dinner with a friend. _  He nodded to himself, approving his own thinking.

D:   _ Diner.  With Jesus.  We were hungry. _

R:   _ Good.  Social interaction is good. _

_ What is that supposed to mean?  _ He thought to himself.   

D:   _ And food.  _

R:   _ Right.  And making new friends is good too.  I know how hard it is for you to make friends, that’s great Dar. _

With a derisive snort, Daryl pocketed his phone with more force than necessary, then shoved his burger into his mouth taking a far larger bite than he should have.  His cheeks puffed out like a chipmunk, he stabbed a fry into his ketchup and shoved that in as well shaking his head angrily as he glared out the window.

Jesus stopped mid-chew watching it all play out.  When Daryl had finally chewed and swallowed and was at a point where he could talk without food in his mouth, Jesus made the attempt to talk.

“You ever go to the movies?”

Daryl cleared his throat, “Uh, no.  Not really.”

“Hm.  If you ever need a break, from that?” He gestured toward Dary’s phone, “We should go.”

Daryl stared at the pocket his phone was tucked into, knowing Jesus was referring to Rick and whatever had just gone down.

“You don’t look like you’re in the mood tonight, but… sometime, maybe?”  He scraped the last of the food from his plate and signaled to the waitress for the check while Daryl came up with a proper response.

“Is that like… code, for something?”

Jesus chuckled, “You mean is that like a _ gay  _ code language we  _ gay _ guys use, to be all  _ gay _ ?”

Daryl blushed crimson, he was new to all this and here Jesus was making him feel entirely more awkward.

“No, man! Breathe,” he laughed.  “It’s just hanging out.  Just cuz I’m into dudes doesn’t mean I’m going to jump your bones.  I believe in platonic friendships too.”

Daryl shook his head, chuckling quietly to himself.  “Yeah, man, I guess we could do that sometime.”

Daryl and Jesus met for dinner more nights of the week than not.  They even went to the movies once to see the latest action adventure movie in the small theatre in town.   Daryl had taken to ignoring Rick’s texts while they were out, rare as they were; unless it was an emergency, he could respond later.  His time was important too, and he found these excursions with Jesus to be relaxing and stress-free.  Jesus expected nothing of him.  If he couldn’t have Rick to share his time with, Jesus was a viable alternative.  It was Rick that he wanted by his side on those lonely nights he slipped into bed.  And it was Rick’s hands he wanted on his body, pulling him close while he slept, feeling Rick’s heartbeat against his back.

 

~*~

 

“Daryl, how you doin’ today?” asked Denise.  

Daryl responded with his usual shrug, and “Okay, I guess.”

“What do you think about tackling some of the bigger issues today?”

“Bigger issues?”

“Your past, your childhood.  What happened with your Dad-”

“Mm-mm,” he shook his head vehemently.   No way did he feel up for that.  There was not enough prescription medication and alcohol for him to consider discussing what went down that night.  The lowest of lows, it was not something he wished to relive.

“At some point you will need to talk about it.  These thing sometimes have a way of building up inside.  It can affect your life, your relationships.  It grows, and then like a volcano-”

“I have accepted that my life is irrevocably fucked up.  It ain’t ever gonna get any better.  I’m always gonna be ‘that good-for-nothing Dixon trash.’”

“Now that’s not true-”

“It is.  Ask anybody in this podunk town,” Daryl hopped up from his seat and began pacing angrily across the room.

“You’ve got a job, a boss that thinks you’re lovely, and that friend… Paul, is it?  That’s more positive than your father or brother have seen from what I gather.” 

Daryl growled low in his throat, rubbing the heels of his hands against his eyes trying to remove the faces of his family from his mind.  Merle would always hold him back, he knew that.  His Dad?  The man had ruined him forever.  His dreams were still filled with the jeering taunts, and the sounds of the leather belt ripping his flesh.  He could still smell the blood, the coppery notes as the blood had flowed freely from his back.

“Daryl?  Where did you go just now?  In your mind, where were you?”

Daryl shuddered, hands still pressed to his eyes as he shook his body from side to side as if to say ‘ _ No _ .’

“The dreams… no.  He’s there, when I sleep.  I can’t… I can’t get that asshole out of my head,” his hands fell away from his face and hung limply at his side, his eyes wet with tears, and his bottom lip trembled as he spoke.  “It’s like he never left… He’s there!” He pointed to his head, “He’s always _ there _ .”

“Is it your fear that you’ll someday become him?  Is that why you shut yourself off?  And think so poorly of yourself?  Make yourself some untenable sack of human flesh?”

“Oh, how does that make you feel? Doc?” Daryl sneered, making a mockery of Denise’s profession.

“It makes me angry! That’s what, Daryl.  But we’re not here to discuss my feelings, we’re here to discuss you!”  Denise inhaled swiftly, brushing her palms along her thighs drying the sweat while at the same time pulling herself together.  A few calming breaths later, she continued.  “It makes me angry, because you are so much more than that.  It doesn’t matter where a person started in life, they are still worthy of decency and respect.

“Please, come sit?” she pleaded.  “You’re not your father, Daryl.  You’ll not become him.  Your relationships are not worthless.  These connections you are making are not meaningless.”

“I need a break, doc. Can I take a break?” Daryl begged, his hands fisted into his hair and pulling it tight.  “Please?”

“Do your breathing exercises, center yourself… like I showed you.  You’re welcome to go at any time, but I’d like you to come down from this outburst first.”

Daryl turned and leaned his head against the wall, banging it against the wallpaper none too harshly.  A steadying cadence likened to the sound of Rick’s heartbeat when he slept.  Rick, it always came back to Rick.  He needed to hear the sound of his voice, the calming timbre of it.  But would he answer his phone or would he be too busy with classes?  Daryl pushed away from the wall, still tremendously agitated but visibly calmer.  It was enough for Denise to nod at him, calling out to him as he walked out the door to remember their appointment in two days.

Daryl flew down the steps, jumped on his motorcycle and drove straight home.  Taking all the shortcuts he could think of in a hurry to get back to his apartment, his own space, and the sweatshirt Rick had left behind that still held his scent. He pulled into the lot behind the store, hopped off his bike and yanked his helmet from his head.  Immediately fishing the phone from his pocket and dialing Rick.

“Come on, come on…” he muttered as the phone continued to ring.  Inevitably going to voicemail, so Daryl hung up and dialed again.  He did this half a dozen times and sent message after message begging Rick to call.  It was a Friday afternoon, neither too early or too late.  Where was he?

“Fuck,” he hollered, rounding the corner of the building to head toward the stairs.  Jesus was tucked just under the overhang with a cigarette in his mouth.  

“Whoa, there!  Easy fella!”

“Fuck you!”

“Hey, now.  Man, that’s a bit rude-”

Daryl spun on his heel and got into Jesus’ face, poking a finger hard against his chest, 

“Never. Asked. You.”  

He turned to continue on his way to the apartment, when Jesus reached out to grab Daryl’s arm.  With a snarl, Daryl pulled back his free arm lightning fast and swung his fist with all his might toward Jesus’ face, just grazing the man’s chin as he darted back and away from the punch.

“Ah, rough day then?” he asked, “Come on, little sparring to burn off that anger then?”  

Daryl ran at him, lunging toward him and throwing his full weight at the man knocking him to the ground.  Jesus started to laugh which only served to infuriate Daryl more, he pulled back an arm to swing, and Jesus swung his legs knocking Daryl off kilter and straight to the ground.  Hopping to his feet, Jesus gestured with his hands, a “come ‘ere” challenge.  Daryl chased after him, Jesus hopped up on the concrete landing, running across the length of it before jumping over the metal rail on top of the dumpster, and then to the ground.  Daryl did his best to keep up, his ire waning after circling the staircase for the third time.  Jesus finally stopped, three steps up from the ground, “I give!” he conceded, breathing harshly after all the effort.  

“I, wow… haven’t had that kind of a workout in a while, felt good.”  Jesus smiled, a wide toothy grin.  His head falling back, gasping.  Daryl squinted, staring at his neck, the stretch of the flesh.  When Jesus straightened back up, Daryl’s eyes met his, that blue… that amazing shade of blue, and those lips… that bottom lip, so full and plump.  Daryl took a step at a time toward Jesus, his chest heaving, no longer with need for oxygen but just plain need, and want.

He grabbed a fistful of Jesus’ shirt and shoved him up the stairs.  He watched as Jesus’ face fell, changing from mild amusement to recognition of something deeper, something dark and needy. Daryl held him in place, his eyes locked on his while unlocked the door with his free hand and kicked it wide open.  He shoved Jesus hard, who fell back against the couch tumbling over it but managing to right himself, back to standing.  Daryl came at him, positively primal, his shoulders hunched and moving like a feral jungle cat his head dipped and his eyes in a dark glare as he shoved Jesus toward the kitchen.  Pushing him back against the refrigerator, he slid a hand up Jesus’ chest, over that delicious line of his neck and back up into the nape of his neck, filling his hand with his hair and pulling him directly onto his lips.  He sucked Jesus’ bottom lip into his mouth and bit down hard, not hard enough to draw blood or bruise, but hard enough to leave a bit of a mark.  Jesus grunted in surprise, a deep growl that sent a wave of need through Daryl.  He rutted his hips against Jesus, licking his way into Jesus’ mouth and sucking his tongue.  Jesus wedged a leg between Daryl’s lifting it to give Daryl more surface area to rub himself against.

A grunt, and a sigh, and Jesus moved his hips in rhythm with Daryl’s, feeling his own cock swell. The soft grunts coming from Daryl delicious to his own ears, “Ah, this was a most unexpected surprise,” he whispered against Daryl’s ear, licking the lobe as the man set wet sucking kisses in a line down his neck.

“Shut. UP.” Daryl growled, as he bit down on Jesus’ collarbone, his hands wandering, grabbing hold of the bottom of Jesus’ shirt, he pulled back long enough to yank the shirt from his head.  A smattering of hair across the chest, Daryl’s fingers danced through it roughly, and he looked Jesus in the eye as he grabbed a nipple and rolled it firmly between his fingers, the gasping O of Jesus’ lips and the throaty moan that escaped urging Daryl on.

“What I wouldn’t give to have you fill me right here, and right now,” Jesus whispered in a sultry tone.  Daryl’s hands flew to Jesus’ belt, unbuckling it, pulling the snap and yanking down the zipper.  He reached his hand in past the waistband of his underwear, feeling the long smooth cock within.  He grabbed it with his fist, pulling up and down several times in succession until the tip began to weep.  He bent down, taking the head into his mouth, licking the salty drops away, while simultaneously opening the front of his own pants, and taking his erection in hand, fucking into his own fist as he shoved Jesus awkwardly forward.  Bending him over the kitchen table, he spat into his hands. One hand on his cock, and the other rubbing the wet between Jesus’ cheeks against his puckered hole.  Thrusting his fingers in, one, two three spreading him wide open.  Jesus’ hands flew back, pulling the cheeks apart opening himself further, and with one final spit into his hand, Daryl wet his cock and pushed hard against the pucker.  The saliva not nearly slick enough for what they were about to do, but he would be done in mere seconds.

A series of short thrusts, and he pushed past that tight ring of muscle, a guttural groan as he slid home.  He ignored the keening from Jesus, and fucked into him, their skin slapping together, his balls smacking against Jesus’ backside.   Every thrust producing a grunt as the heat within his pelvis burned brighter and hotter.  His fingers gripping Jesus’ hips tight enough to bruise, his back hunched so he was nearly bent in half as he put all his focus into fucking that tight hole.   Three hard thrusts, and the white light burst behind his eyes as he came.  He took a moment to capture his breath, pulling out and stumbling backward to catch his balance on the counter.  Through his gasps, he heard a thud by the door.  His ducked down and grabbed his pants, hoisting them back up as his face aligned with one very shocked Richard Grimes.

“Oh, shit…” Jesus jumped up, pulling up his pants and tugging his shirt over his head.  He looked at Daryl and then Rick, “I’ll leave you two to it…” Righting his belt, and straightening his shirt, he walked to the door.  His fingers resting softly on Rick’s shoulder, “I’m sorry…”

Through red rimmed wet eyes, Rick managed to look at Jesus and nod before stepping away.  His hand on his mouth, biting a finger and struggling to understand what he had just witnessed.

Daryl stared wide eyed at Rick as he buttoned his pants and buckled his belt.  “I… I called,” he offered weakly.

“Yeah,” Rick nodded, wincing.  “I was only 15 minutes away.  Wanted to surprise you with a long weekend.  I tested out early on one of my classes.”

“Oh,” Daryl ran his hands over his face to brush his hair out of his eyes, catching the scent of Jesus on them, he walked to the sink and washed them quickly with soap and water.

“Why… what.  I guess I didn’t understand the… urgency?  How long you been fuckin’ him?”  A tear threatened to slide down Rick’s cheek, not going unnoticed by Daryl.  Rick’s hands began to tremble, he held palm up, out by his side shaking his head in disbelief.  “I thought you were just friends… What happened?”

“Ain’t never done that before,” Daryl admitted.  “I don’t know what happened.”

“You don’t know-,” a mirthful chuckle escaped Rick’s mouth.  “You don’t  _ know  _ how your dick ended up in his ass?  Are you fucking kidding me?” he roared.

Daryl’s chin begin to tremble as the full magnitude of what he had just done fell down upon him.  His mind flashing back over the course of their relationship.  Their times together in delicate intimacy, watching Rick throw his head back and laugh, the genuine smiles he got from the Grimes family when he joined them at the dinner table.  

“I don’t know. I… had an appointment this morning and it went bad.  I wasn’t right.  I needed you. I called you and called you and called you, and texted.  And you never responded.”  Daryl’s voice escalated in pitch as he desperately let the words spill from his mouth as fast as they could.  “I needed you, and you weren’t there-”

“So you, what… replaced me?  With him?”

“No. NO. Never.  You.  I want only you-”

“And where were you just 5 minutes ago, but to the hilt inside Jesus.”  Rick fell back against the wall, his face turned away no longer able to look Daryl in the face.

“I don’t know what to say…” Daryl pulled out a chair from the table, and flopped down onto it, leaning forward onto his knees trying to draw the strength and willpower needed to fix this disaster.  The radio was playing softly in the background, he kept it on round the clock as a form of white noise, finding it calmed him at times.  A voice crooned out along with a familiar melody, 

_ I’m right in the wrong direction, _

_ Cuz wrong’s what I do best. _

“Like the song goes,” he feebly responded, gesturing toward the radio.  “Ain't right, but wrong’s what I do best...”

“No,” Rick shook his head. “That’s not true.  You were the best thing that ever happened to me.  Don’t you dare tell me that what I feel… that what I felt was wrong.  Maybe I’ll regret it once I get past this.”

“I’m sorry,” Daryl whispered taking steps toward Rick.  He threw up his hands and backed away.  

“I can’t…” Rick picked up his bag and walked to the door, stopping a moment to right himself against the doorjamb.  Over his shoulder he spoke low, “It’s not right… what you did.  It’s not right, but it’s okay.  If I’d just answered the damn phone-” Rick punched the doorjamb until his knuckles bled, and Daryl stood behind him crying softly.

“I’m sorry,” he reached out toward Rick, but he was gone.  “Oh, god…” he fell to his knees.

 

~*~

 

Rick sped home with tears in his eyes and pulled his phone out. He was about to call Shane but as soon as he would tell him what happened, he would instantly hear an “I told you so” but he refrained. He sighed and looked at the house as he was parked in the street and turned his truck off. As he got out and headed inside, he saw his parents sitting in the kitchen. His dad was reading the newspaper as usual and his mom was doing her crossword puzzle. 

“Hey, Ma.” Rick whispered bending down and kissed her cheek. 

“Why, Richard. Why didn’t you call to let us know you were on your way home!” She squealed and got up out of her seat pulling him into a tight hug. 

“Tested out of my last class and decided to just come on home for the weekend. Hey, Dad.” Rick sighed as he received nod from him. 

“Well, how was the drive?” She asked as she went to the stove, “Are you hungry, dear?”

“It was okay. And no, I’m not. Pretty tired, I think I’m gonna’ go lay down for a hour or so.”

“Did you stop and see Daryl? I’m sure he’d be excited to see you.” She hollered as he started walking away, causing him to stop in the hallway. 

“No, I didn’t go see him, Ma. Like I said, I just wanted to come home and see you guys. Maybe tomorrow.” He sighed forcing him to swallow his tears that were building up and continued walking up the stairs. 

“Rick!” She hollered from the kitchen but received no answer. She turned and looked at Sam who sighed and continued to pretend to read the newspaper. 

“Samuel,” she paused waiting for him to put the paper down. 

“What, Evie?” Sam huffed and took the last sip of his coffee. 

“I’m worried about Rick.” 

“He just drove hours to make it home. Why are you worried. The boy’s tired. Let ‘im be.” 

“That’s just it! Every time he comes back home, he sees Daryl first! And now, all of a sudden, he comes home first. And he’s not hungry!? He’s always ready to eat my food,” She scolded with her arms flailing all over the place. 

“Damnit, Evie! IF something is wrong, Rick would tell us. He probably stopped and got him something to eat on the way here. The boy is probably just tired.” He growled and stood up then went out into the garage. 

Rick made it upstairs and shut his door. He looked around realizing that nothing changed from when he moved to Atlanta. He sighed and looked at the unmade bed with two pillows as he set his bag down. He walked over to his bed and sat down then grabbed the pillow that Daryl had used. He pulled it to his nose and inhaled deeply feeling tears pool in his eyes and as he blinked they fell like a waterfall down his cheeks and onto the pillow. He laid down with the pillow in his arms and gently began crying and then heard his phone go off. He pulled it out of his pocket, seeing the first letter of Daryl’s name and he tossed the phone out of the window not even caring about it breaking and went back to crying into his pillow until he cried himself to sleep. 


End file.
